Vulnerable
by TrueHeartsGlow
Summary: After Itachi's death, Sasuke plans a new revenge. His goal: To kill Naruto. But will he make it?
1. Prologue

_Hello!_

_This is my first yaoi fanfic. It is a collaboration, though, with a friend I rp with. __Her username on FanFiction is _thesurreal.

_This fan fic was initially intended for roleplay purposes, so the format might now seem a bit off to you. Well, that's why. I tried making it a bit more clear and easier to read by adding Naruto and Sasuke POVS. _

_I am writting as Sasuke and she is writting as Naruto. Please, bear with us and with any mistakes in the flow of the plot or any OOCness, because as I said it was written having it in mind as a rp. I am sorry for any inconvenience._

_So,...: _

_ **thesurreal: **Naruto**  
**_

**TrueHeartsGlow: **Sasuke**  
**

_The rp hasn't been completed yet so updates' frequency may vary from time to time. Please, tell us what you think, we'd appreciate it greatly!  
_

_**Plot**__**: It starts off with Sasuke aiming to kill Naruto in order to revenge Konoha. **_

_(We started the rp long before the current events in the manga, so it wasn't bound to follow the manga plot.)_

_Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, credit for characters goes to Masashi Kishimoto. _

_

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_Naruto's POV_

Time was like a film reel in his mind.

He'd stand at the window in some stiff outfit for hours, feeling uncomfortable and exposed as people blabbered on, smiling but shaking from their nerves. The missions would start, and he'd be the only one to remember the names, the only one who really paid attention. All eyes were on what was beyond that window, except him.

He'd be watching someone's reflection, trying to gauge how much they looked like _him_, how much they differed. His consultants would drone on and he'd tune out the words and the old people would start sniffling into their handkerchiefs. It was all a game, really. Bundles of temporary worries, tied in a neat little bow.

Finally, the words he wanted to hear: ''**It seems to be getting late, Naruto. Shouldn't you be heading home?**'''

But inside he would be screaming

"No! We can't! The works not done yet! _He_'s not back!''

but the words wouldn't come out and he'd watch everyone walk out the door, to their families. And then he'd follow the crowd as a second wave, wishing he wasn't so tired or lonely. His apartment was but a short walk away, to the point he knew exactly how many footsteps it took to get there from the gravel road.

_Maybe I shouldn't go_, he told himself as people blurred past, barely able to even nod at their comments, a blank smile drawn on his face. How much would it bother them if he just took a break?

Naruto sighed, stuffing his hands into his pockets. A number of lights illuminated up ahead, prying a set of blue optics to stumble that way. Like a moth to it's flame. He fell into a routine here, greeting shop owners and buying the same groceries. But none of it felt right... none of it felt _safe_.

''**Yo, Lee!**'' Raising his hand in mock wave, Naruto plopped aside the ninja with a grunt, shaking his head.

''**Ramen, please.**''

The tiny woman flitted before him, just on the other side of the counter. She nodded then, scuttling off to get his order in record time. She seemed scared, frightened... almost. And that made him even more tired, because she was thinking the same thing they all were.

'_He's going to fall over dead one of these days._'

''**Hey, Naruto. Glad to see you're finally relaxing.**''

The blond blinks, looking at Lee. Naruto shrugs, laying an elbow on the counter. He props his cheek against his hand, grinning that trademark smile of his. Hokage or not, he'd never lost that goofy spark.

''**Yea, no kidding. I was beginning to think they'd lock me up for good with all that paperwork!**''

* * *

_Sasuke's POV_

Sasuke was sitting on a sharp cold rock, his head leaning downwards, his mind lost in old memories, back when he, Sakura and Naruto were all 3 together, in team 7, struggling to make a difference among the other ambitious little genins of Konoha.

And there they were now, him being a missing nin with a goal of killing the current hokage, Naruto being the said hokage and Sakura somewhere lost in her ambition to become a common but good medic nin.

With a bit of frustratingly tiring effort, he pushed his emotions away, locking them in a part of his heart he didn't know, as always. A small part, like a small wooden dusty box, where everything unecessary-like emotions and feelings- was kept in.

He had a goal, to kill Naruto and to take over Konoha. It was mostly a revenge plan: To avenge his family's and Itachi's death. Konoha had to pay. And the ones rulling it ought to suffer most of everyone else.

Once the blonde ninja was dead, there went also the only person that could compare to his strength in the whole existing ninja world.

This time he was alone in this mission. Sure, team taka would accompany his every step till he reached Konoha but then he was alone: just him and Naruto.

And knowing Naruto, he wasn't a coward. In the end, he had no other choice than facing him himself with all the consequences, good or bad, that might bring.

As he polished the stealth of his katana, he stood up in a superficially calm motion, recognizing the familiar sound of his female teammate's footsteps, Karin's.

''Sasuke-kun, the rest of us are ready. We are to part for Konoha whenever you give command.' 'the red head said, eyeing Sasuke with a dreamy obedient expression in her eyes.

''Hn.'' Sasuke looked over at the horizon hesitantly, momentarily losing focus on Karin and on what she was blubbering at the moment.

Did he have it in him to kill Naruto? He knew he felt nothing for him but sometimes he felt doubts torturing him. Was it his long lost conscience nagging to him for having let himself get lost so much in the darkness in order to waste his childhood friend for his revengeful aim?

Karin noticing the hesitant motion that had taken over Sasuke's stance, she broke the silence.

''We can always wait , if you need some more time alone.'' she said remembering how he had wished to stay alone since early this morning and it was near noon now.

''No. I am fine. Let's get going.'' Sasuke answered rather sharply to her, snapping out of his delirium. He didn't need to come out as a hesitant coward.

It was a rather simple-yet dangerous plan. But he had to appear confident about it to his team…because inside him he wasn't.

The girl, intimidated, nodded and turned around to alert the rest of the team.

Sasuke looked at her rather annoyed for her girlish assumptions-which still held some truth, not that he'd ever admit it out loud, and set off after her, taking his time.

Doubts still torturing him, he decided to turn his conscience off, taking on his path serious and silent.

* * *

_Naruto's POV_

''**Hey, I've been meaning to ask you, Hokage,**'' Naruto closed his eyes. That word. God, how he hated that word. ''**What do you plan to do about the-**'' Words blotted themselves from his mind, and he tried his best to seem remotely interested in what his companion said.

Lee was a trusted ally, he reminded himself. Anything he asked should hold unmentionable value. Unfortunatly, Naruto was starting to find that a number of his friends had been slipping through the cracks lately, and the ones that remained.. well..

''**Do you agree?**''

''**Huh? Yeah, sure.**''

Lee didn't look so convinced. After a moment though, the green-clad man sighed. One had to be patient when dealing with Naruto. It was part of the game, after all. Just like everything else.

''**Look. Perhaps it's time to...**'' there was a pregnant pause, and it confused the blond. He hadn't even touched his meal yet, simply let his fingers graze over the edge of it's lip. It was getting hard to feel hungry anymore, when he knew that at that moment, he could be doing something more valuable. ''**..Stop searching for Sasuke.**''

It was over now.

He wanted to go home. No, he did not know what he would do when he made it there or how he was going to even manage a decent nap. But he needed to leave. Sneaking money to pay for both their meals (though Lee was probably more than aware) out of his pocket, he spoke charmingly in correspondence, as if he didn't intend to start walking away without looking back.

In other words, Lee had questioned him about the one thing he did not want to approach. And he even had his mouth open to say no when Lee decided to butt in for him, spotting the blanks with red.

He was a good friend, and would not reveal to Lee that something was wrong. Cus' god forbid, the almighty Hokage be anything short of the perfection he must ensue. Searching for _him_ had been a waste of money and resources for a long time, and it was understandable that Lee broach the subject now: when the economy was in such a crisis.

But still, he would not answer him.

The walk back had given him time to formulate what he needed to do for tomorrow. Yes, he hadn't slept in the past three days and he should have gone home earlier but he did not in any way want to fall behind in paperwork.

He was really trying, hell, he had been trying for years to make things better and he could try harder now. But he just needed some time away to get over Sasuke's betrayal and make himself happy for the village.

Because that's how their lives were destined to be. Uchiha was just an old stain that needed to be washed out. Then, everything would be pristine again. If only he could take things back and if only Naruto would forget and if only he didn't feel that all that was left inside of him was a hardened, blackened lump of a heart. This. This thing Naruto held onto had changed everything.

And he was afraid that despite his perfect little role, where he could not stutter or choke on his emotions, he could not fufill his promises.

''**Heh.**'' Tilting his head to view the moon overhead, Naruto frowned in the caressing light.

It was surreal, how much that lonely figure reminded him of the Uchiha... and how much it hurt to simply breathe the night air. But still, he walked on, entering the small apartment he knew so well, and falling back on his bed.

_Sasuke's POV_

Once reaching the rest of his teammates, following after Karin's narrow path, Sasuke's eyes lifted for a moment from the suddenly so interesting ground and fell on the people that surrounded him.

Karin, Suigetsu and Jugo. Each with their own personality, in which he too very little interest in but he had come by time to learn and appreciate their good points and correct their negative ones.

After all, they were serving his own purposes and they were well aware of that. That was his ninja way, doing everything for his own reasons and in his own way, faithful to his path of hatred and darkness.

What did it matter if people hated him, admired him, feared him, disrespected him for that? He couldn't bring himself to care a single bit for the rest of the world resting outside his goal...

And his aim now was the fifth hokage, his ex teammate and childhood friend. The one he so despised and cared for in the same time, back then…When the innocence hadn't left completely his childish soul.

He pushed the melancholy that was threatening to paralyze his determination away from his tired soul and he nodded to the people that were looking at him with a familiar unconditional devotion, he so rarely took appreciation in, being so drawn in his own aims and dark reasons.

''Let's set off. We need to be by Konoha early tomorrow morning.'' he said in a low but commanding voice, to let them know once again he was the one pulling the strings in the team. Not that it was needed, seeing as no one in particular felt like rebelling to him, but Sasuke enjoyed a subtle demonstration of power every now and then.

''Whatever, let's just start.'' Suigetsu said.

''At your commands, Sasuke-sama.' 'Jugo said with his kind eyes taking in Sasuke's depressed dark figure.

''Hai, Sasuke-kun.'' Karin exclaimed, with something like a worried expression on her face that she couldn't manage to hide that well.

Sasuke felt annoyed that he had her worrying over him in her own girly obsessed way but he ignored her, as he always did and took on walking slowly, leading the road in a false determination for his companions to follow.

It had been many hours that they had been walking now and the sky was dark, with small sparkling shivering stars decorating the nightly veil.

Karin was the first, as typical of her womanly sensitivity- to notice that they needed to take a break or even perhaps a rest as they had been walking for 7 hours non stop till now.

She had tried but failed to initiate a conversation with Sasuke numerous times during the journey.

Her teammate seemed to be lost in deep thoughts- of course, it was typical of him to be always distant like that-but something about his overall stance told her that he was having a sort of an inner struggle about his up coming effort on claiming the hokage's life.

Of course, she couldn't understand how he could feel, she had never been in the need to kill an ex teammate of hers for any reason, but she was a woman-even if ruthless at times- and a woman's heart can reach to great depths of compassion when she loves someone the way she loved him.

Sasuke spared her a tired glance, noticing the pensive look on her face and thought he'd try to ease her down.

''Ok, we can rest for the night. We are only 5 hours away. We can resume our road first thing in the dawn.'' he said calm but coldly as he turned around to look at all of them looking back at him.

''Hai, Sasuke-kun.''Karin said, glad he had noticed their need for rest, too.

''I will go bring some woods for the fire.'' Jugo suggested and Sasuke nodded in comprehension.

''And I will just rest my tired a** on this nice soft grass.'' Suigetsu spat out rudely ignoring Karin's death glares, as he sat down on the ground, letting out a sigh of fatigue.

Sasuke motioned to Karin to get some rest , too, as he sat down on a round rock, waiting for Jugo to come back.

* * *

_Naruto's POV_

''**Lee's right.**''

He stopped as if to think this over, deciding that it might be taken the wrong way (well, the right way, but he didn't want to comprehend it in such a manner).

''**I mean, come on Naruto. How stupid can you be?**'' he joked, trying to the voice screaming in his head that he couldn't give up yet.

How he had to stay focused.

Naruto stretched blandly, his back arching from the stuffy mattress in a tremoring manner. To be honest, he'd offer his own soul if it meant getting over this ex-teammate of his. The images of their battles cycled in his head, making his heart knock painfully against his ribs in a constant manner.

Naruto had hoped lingering on the bad memories would give him a bit of courage, a bit of sense to just be pissed at the other and leave him behind. But he couldn't. And it seemed as though the world around him had made the boy masochistic with time.

_Naruto naruto naruto naruto naruto!_ The harsh sentiments broke in his mind, disrupting the dilluted reflection of his personal torture. Everyone needed him for something. Everyone wanted his answers.

''**Just do what needs to be done.**'' he whispered, trying to reason with himself. As if it would make things better, albeit the fact remained no one would care if the Uchiha remained lost.

In fact, no one else even cared about the number of people who had died since he took over as Hokage.

Naruto wasn't well versed in which mathematic problem could help answer a situation or what limit of chakra was required to accomplish a task, but he did know that he would always be the one who looked back on life because of what he'd lost.

The one who remembered, the one who was to blame.

It's only when he accepts this fact, that he sleeps.

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_**R&R, plox? **_

_***puppy eyes***_


	2. Closer

Thanks to the people favoriting this story, you are wonderful! :3 If you like, please do bother to post a review. It would make me very happy. See ya!

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_Naruto's POV_

''**Okay, calm down. I'll have the paperwork in a few moments. **''

The warmly lit room erupted into an airy groan. He had figured on owing his assistant some extra paperwork for sleeping in, but everyone knew at once it was going to be a rough day. Naruto slipped a shaky palm across his face, trying to calm down.

The office was decorated from head to toe in all sorts of genuine symbols, with plants hanging from the corners, and chairs that were covertly placed near random doorways. In all, it made the room seem comforting. Friendly, even.

But when the eye moved toward the main table, one realized it was overflowing with everything made by Naruto's leadership. It was a room that choked the life out of him, slowly but surely.

''**Really, sir. A-are you s-sure I c-c-cant...**''

''**No, no! I have it here. Just-**'' Shaking his head, the Hokage skimmed through a number of papers on his desk, knocking half of the assortment onto the floor. His assistant, Mai, motioned to help him pick up said things when Naruto snapped backward, beaming like a fool.

''**Here it is! The Rank B mission statement, right?**'' Looking to Mai as an acceptance, she grew somewhat poised under the rapt attention. So, when she said nothing, the taller male pursed his lips, and handed her the slip anyway.

It was only six in the morning.

He'd gotten three hours of sleep last night(which to him, counted as sleeping in), then tumbled back to the office in hopes of getting on with some actual conferencing. What he found.. was _this_.

A whole new load of incoming information about various requests or missions that had been completed while he was away. Atop this pile was something Naruto recognized as Lee's writing, requesting the immediate termination of the Uchiha search.

''**Pardon, Hokage-sama. I was wondering...**'' Perching at the edge of his chair, Naruto shuffled the papers closest to him. He was just starting to skim over the second page when he heard somebody clear their throat; obviously determined to have his attention. ''**Hokage?**''

''**I'm sorry, what?**''

''**I said, some of the jounin have requested to know if you have..**''

It would never end, would it?

_Sasuke's POV_

It was just early dawn when the roosters were heard singing their morning hymn. Sasuke was still asleep and far from waking up yet.

Karin was the first one to wake herself up and then the rest of the team, passing from each one with a different good morning message.

To Jugo, it was a soft tag on his shoulder and a faint uneager whisper of ''wake up.''  
To Suigetsu, it was a harsh kick on the ribs accompanied by her deadly silence and a death glare shot right at the slumbery eyes of his.  
To Sasuke , it was more of an intense lovesick stare on his closed eye lids, before finally deciding to put her fan girlish obsession aside, with a soft caress on his pale cheek, which was more than enough to send him perfectly awake and alert for any thread in his surroundings.

Then, once he made sure it was his teammate's soft hand which he had felt brushing against his facial skin so lovingly, he gave her a soft glance and muttered a good morning, faking his mood for the sake of the team's ethic.

Detaching his teen body from the ground, he stood up, clenching his fists and facing the rising sun, with a bold look on his overall figure.

_''Today, you are going down, …hokage_.'' he thought to himself, his dark side surfacing inside him, hungry for revenge.

Karin wrapped a vest around him and took on tying up the laces for him.

Upon his frustration growing bigger on the womanly gesture, he gently but surely placed his hand over her soft one and hold it in his, looking in her eyes intensely for a few but yet infinite moments, before pushing it away and ending any physical contact between him and the worried red head.

''Don't worry about me. Just take care of yourself and the others.'' he told her as he walked past her without looking back.

Karin nodded silently. Even if everyone knew Sasuke's powers were equal or even bigger to Naruto's, she couldn't help but worry , being well aware that a missing nin wouldn't just have it easy walking up to Konoha and fighting with the hokage.

Probably, a whole village would walk out all the way against him in order to protect its hokage and fight him to death, or even Naruto's hurt feelings for his ex teammate betrayal would eventually surface and allow him to let the world see the terrible but powerful demon residing in him, the nine tailed beast.

Karin knew Sasuke wasn't as stupid as to walk up straight to Naruto in front of everyone else and say'' I want to kill you.''  
or even attack him out straightly for that part. But also she knew the hokage was surrounded by high security guardians-ANBUs- all the time and it would be hard if not impossible secluding him for the needed amount of time for the battle to initiate, take place and get over with, with either of them dead, neither, or maybe both.

She didn't want to see Sasuke dead but she was under his orders and she placed the devotion she had for him over his life.

So under all and every dark thought that crossed her mind and tormented her infatuated heart, she was nothing more than a mere pioneer in Sasuke's hands in order to achieve his revenge to Konoha, just like the rest of the team Taka.

They had already walked a long road, while Karin was thinking of all that stuff but Sasuke didn't seem phased.  
And this weirded her out since his deeply pensive image of yesterday still wandered in her mind, creating a big contradiction between his past and present attitude.

She walked right after him, not missing a step. It didn't matter what she did to protect him now, out of Konoha. Cause once there, she wouldn't have the chance to do anything. She looked at his retreating back in sadness, which Suigetsu noticed and thought he'd tease her for that.

''You dumb red head, you'd better focus on the journey than your little silly worries on what color you're gonna paint your nails next.'' the purple haired man said which had Karin snap out and slap him viciously across his head.

''Shut up, you moron. I am just anxious for this mission, thats all. So, please, do mind your own business, water boy.'' she said, the last two words pronounced mockingly.

In reality, Suigetsu was only trying to piss her off in order to take her mind from the dark thoughts she replayed in her head non stop over her Sasuke-kun's future to be.

Sasuke shot them both a frustrated glare, which spoke volumes on its own and soon Karin calmed down while Suigetsu still insisted on angering her by doing improper hand signs which she ignored with a cold heart.

Jugo following closely after Sasuke, he was the only one of his companions to remain as calm and determined as Sasuke was about this.

They were very close now, just standing out of the borders of Konoha and Sasuke came to a halt, the rest of Taka imitating him.

Suddenly, a weird emotional aura surrounded them.

Even Suigetsu seemed to be worrying over their leader now.

Tears threatened Karin's eyes but Sasuke gave her a pleading look, he didn't have time for such girlish scenes and Karin not wanting to burden him more, masked her worry behind a serious mask and nodded calmly.

''You've done your job so far in this. All you got to do now is to hide in these woods here and wait for me till I come back. If I don't after the period of 4 days, then leave and don't come back for me.'' he said, in a rather emotionless way, which would make them admire his bravery if it wasn't for his typical self to be so unexpressive.

''Just don't make us come in there and kick some ass.'' Suigetsu said, looking at him rather embarassed for the sake of the moment.

''I won't.'' Sasuke returned, looking at him in a neutral way.

''Are you sure you don't want us to come with you?'' Jugo asked, looking at Sasuke in a warm friendly way.

''No, I need to do this alone.'' Sasuke said, clenching on his katana and stabilizing it on his shoulder, and everyone automatically knew that their brief and dry bye scene had come to an end.

He made some steps forward but Karin ran after him and wrapped her arms around him, hugging him from behind.

''Sasuke-kun,..please,… take care.'' she said , her voice broken from her effort to hold back her childish tears.

''Karin, let go.'' Sasuke said after a prolonged silence, during which he had remained completely still.  
Karin wiped off her tears that had finally fallen and stained her pale cheeks and forced herself to pull away.  
A soft and relieved sigh was heard from Sasuke's part at that.

Once he felt himself freed from Karin's grip, he turned his head and shot them all one last glance.

''Bye.'' he said dryly and with that he resumed his walking and with a steady but unreadable pace, vanishing behind the bushes that covered the borders which connected the forest to the village.

_Naruto's POV_

Naruto was a little concerned about how he was going to get these papers distributed. Especially since he doubted Mai would let other ninja deliver them while she was filing reports. And he most certainly didn't want to spend the night here, like always. Not with everyone's stupid stares digging into his back. Honestly, couldn't they find something better to do?

... Maybe he could just- no, no slouching! He was anxious to get this work done, knowing some of it would mean the difference between life or death for his people.

''**I-i'm back, Naruto. I-is there... anyt-thing else?**''

Well, ********. Did she really want an honest answer to that? Naruto peeked up at her through heavy lids. He noticed her dark hair had been set in tendrils today, poofed out in a mild assortment of curls. No, he realized. She didn't. He could not say what it was he really wanted, no matter how many times she asked. It wasn't good having this thing (although it seemed pretty invisible to others) hanging over him, yes, since it was ready to crush him if he couldn't keep a good hold on it. But he wouldn't share it. Nor speak of it.

Because Mai was a sweet girl, and didn't need to know about his imperfections. Wasn't allowed to, actually. Cus' he was a 'role model'.

''**Um.....**'' She fidgeted, waiting for him to continue. Unfortunately, an errand wasn't coming to him. Nothing, absolutely nothing.

''**Well I...uh...**'' He shrugged, scratching the recesses of his mind for the things he had just been worrying about. When he finally remembered, the male frowned.

''**It's not important, just some stupid stuff.**'' He lifted a rather large stack of crinkled papers, handing them off.

Mai nodded in her own little way, slipping her arms around the files and shuffling out. It was probably best to just keep his distance today, maybe start writing slower. His name had been scribbled across countless papers already, to the point Naruto had to stop once in a while to massage the crimp in his arm.

''**s**t. I forgot one. Hey Mai-?**''

Lifting the letter of recognition, Naruto reread it's content afore cursing inwardly. This was Lee's request. The one about Sasuke. And there, at the bottom of the page in frail lettering.. perhaps a bit too neat and precise.. was his name.

''**I'll just do it myself. Those papers are gonna take her forever.**''

Sighing, Naruto tucked the letter into his large overcoat, automatically rummaging around for a scrap of paper to entail where he'd be going. She may have had a problem with one of the ninja delivering her messages, but he was her _boss_. He could get away with stuff like that, right?

One of the Anbu guards, regarded his actions with interest. The other, seemed resolute. Naruto tapped the curious fellow on the shoulder as consequence, just as he was passing. It was a silent request of sorts. If only, so Naruto wouldn't be lectured later. God knows how many times he'd heard that one. An anbu guard was plenty of protection when considering that he was already capable of protecting himself.

''**Hokage-sama, where are we going?**''

''**Lee's.**''

''**Wouldn't you rather I do this for you?**''

''**No, no. I need the exercise.**'' He faked a smile. It was easier to do this with the aid of sunlight blinding his companion for a moment. ''**As your fellow ninja, I believe it would be poorly noted if I got fat.**''

_Sasuke's POV_

While his team taka had stayed back in his angonious awaiting, Sasuke made his way through the little old familiar side roads of Konoha, that weren't often used by civillains, if only for some emergency reason.

He knew his secret ways around, what paths and ways to take in order to be the least noticed. It was like he was planning his suicide, only procrastinating while at it, by following less popular routes.

He just needed to keep attention off of him till he had managed to make Naruto's heart stop beating. Till he fulfilled his revenge against the ignorant village.

He threw his hood over his head, completely covering his spiked raven hair and his pale, tired but determined face where his onyx eyes shined dangerously with murderous instinct.

His katana, his shurikens and kunai were resting well hidden inside the plains of his vest and pants.

He could come off as someone slightly suspicious or even as a plain villager minding his own business.

It wasn't uncommon for villagers of Konoha to walk around in hoods and robes every now and then and even if this didn't pass, he knew that he might be considered an evil b*****d but not a crazy one so far.

So who would expect Sasuke Uchiha to make a direct attack to the fifth hokage, entering Konoha completely unaccompanied and lightly armed?

He was to play his greatest cards with his raw powers and jutsu, the armor was just an extra burden he had to carry with him for the sake of old typicalities regarding a ninja's physical safety revolving around armory protection.

Every now and then he'd run onto a simple villager on his way into Konoha-they'd pause briefly to look at him weirdly and then they continued their way.

As the raven villain had guessed, no one was crazy enough to think Sasuke Uchiha would ever dare such a suicidal act.

He knew where he wanted their battle to take place.

The hokages' heads at the other end of Konoha seemed like the perfect place.  
How dramatic and spectacular would it be if he cut the present hokage's life string in front of the souless ''eyes'' of Konoha's past heroic benefactors?  
But the thing that kept torturing his busy mind the most was how to get the hokage there. And with no protection to guard his skin whatsoever.  
He had to base on his luck for that but he never liked letting himself go on unsure things like this. But he had really no choice though at this very situation, since risking to lure Naruto along somehow would be far too risky, even for the actions he had engaged himself into so fearlessly, so far.

He lost no more time thinking about this for right then he had to get himself out of the dangerous for him village and onto the rocky surfaces. He fastened his pace till he made it unnoticed to the end of the village, spread in front of the rocky leaders.

He looked upon them from under his hood. Time didn't seem to have had a notable effect on their surface. And it seemed as if Naruto and Konoha as in general had taken good care of them.

His heart racing in the renewed thought of Naruto as someone he knew personally and not simply as the current hokage of Konoha, he looked one last time back at the village in struggling melancholy and after making sure he didn't sense any foreign chakra around, he set off for the cliffs.

Once, there, the missing nin, started climbing the big rocks, till he had made it slowly to the top of them.

He nested behind the rocky heads. He had a good view of the village from that spot, spreading as a color pallet in front of the feet of the soulless giants.

He brought out his water bottle and drunk some of it, as he had forgotten to make use of this essential liquid long ago after the sun had risen.

Once letting some drops slid into his thirsty mouth, he regained his composure , as characteristicall of him, and placed the bottle back inside his robe's folds.

He sat down and rested his back against a brown rock, the back of his head coming in contact with the hard and cold surface as he let out a relieved sigh and closed his eyes in fatigue.

The hardest part had been done. He was where he wanted to be, and in the position to inspect all of Konoha on top of that hill ,visible by no one, the great hokages' heads protecting and hiding him from human view.

Now it was a matter of fate if he'd leave this village again alive or if he'd fall on these grounds dead by the hokage's hands or someone else's.

He wished with all his heart that he could only be as lucky as to have the chance to encounter Naruto on his own, deprived by the ANBU guardiance.

He remained still, eyes closed, all of his senses still alert for any chakra located around his spot or any sound that should worry him, the singing of the birds being his only companion in his agonious awaiting.

_Naruto's POV_

The worst part about bringing a guard with you, was that everyone had to acknowledge your presence. It didn't help that he was required to wear such an overbearing coat, either. The sticky heat melted down his neck, making the Hokage yawn with an exaggerated sense. It really wasn't so bad out today, but definitely not a type of weather he'd like to sit in for long. Naruto was careful to smile at passerby's, wanting to seem polite as he made his way through the town. Some would even follow him, asking small questions or requesting further council at a later hour.

Nonetheless, all were handled with the utmost gentleness, provided his guard wouldn't let them get within an arms reach. Dust kicked up underneath his toes, making a loud scratching noise as they walked. Maybe that's why he kept kicking his feet, long after they left general population and came upon Lee's estate. Because the noise kept him more at peace than anything else had in a long time.

His guard on the other hand, didn't seem to share the same opinion. He frowned openly from underneath the tilt of his mask, no doubt cursing the Hokage for such a childish manner. They approached the home in record time, a few swift gusts breaking past the pair as they proceeded to enter the gate and move upon the grounds themselves. Naruto almost became distracted by the heavy greenery in this place, blue eyes flashing to every hue and meager whim of the home.

_How am I not surprised it's all green?_ Snorting, Naruto branched outward to the east entrance, knowing that by this time, Lee was probably still training. His mind raced with images of the boy he was about to forsake with this letter, and god, it hurt. Had he been alone, Naruto would have surely clasped a hand over his heart.

''**Uzumaki? What are you doing here?**'' Naruto smiled as he came across a familiar figure, already putting up his best charade to the question. Quietly, he began to withdraw the paper he had been keeping tucked away for safe keeping. Lee watched him then, trying to remove the fact that Naruto's hand was shaking as they entered the building.

He just... couldn't stop. The blond teetered on his feet, shifting from one spot to the next. He was so nervous.

Naruto's search had meant the world to him; everyone knew that. And ending it meant breaking a promise to Sakura, giving up on a friendship, and so much more.

''**Oh Naruto, I could've..**''

''**No.**'' A slight sting of irritation stabbed at his spine. Did everyone think him incapable of delivering a message? Besides, he didn't want to risk someone finding out about this. He heard the door close and then the Anbu guard moved to sit on a nearby table.

Naruto sighed, rubbed his temples and decided that perhaps it wouldn't hurt to just let Lee take over as Hokage for a while. He'd keep the village in line and it would show everyone that he could be a responsible person, permitting Naruto vanish for a while. Make this search more private, yeah? Nothing could go wrong with Lee in command.

''**Thank you for getting back to me so quickly.**'' Lee's hand brushed along the paper, opting to remove it from Naruto's possession in one swift move. Once it was gone, the blond realized how empty he felt, and stumbled away.

''**Yeah, well... I think your right.**'' he said. The last thing he needed was for Lee to get all sappy on him, exploring the reasons why Naruto might still feel attached to the Uchiha.. even after all these years.

''**The money would be better spent on weapons.**''

Inwardly, he rolled his eyes. People had been pushing for this new weapon exploration lately, and it was beginning to annoy him. The weapons they had were fine, by all means. Shuriken and scrolls had worked for years. Why did they need something more sophisticated?

''**..Do you **_**want**_** to stop searching, **_**Naruto**_**?**'' The thought hadn't even occurred that Lee would ask him that. Naruto chuckled his little forced sound and then started toward the door.

''**I'll see you later, Lee.**'' before he left and felt his guard jog up beside him, the other's last words ringing in his ear,

''**Wait Nar-**'' By now he had made it to the gate and hesitated for a few moments before putting on a serious face and crouching down to the ground. He felt like he was gonna puke, and as luck would have it, as soon as he had lurched forward to the grass...

He did.

For a moment Naruto just sat there, his back to the iron door, arms at his sides, eyes down. He realized that he was going to have to go back to the office and finish up his work now, cheerful and charming just as he always was. But it wasn't going to be easy. Because now, he knew it was over. All his researching and silent prayers for finding their lost friend, was finished.

Minutely, he remembered how before, his life had been so simple. He had a goal. He had friends. He had _Sasuke_. Now, there was nothing left for him to do but carry out his life, safe-guarding the village like the others had. He had lost two of the things on his list, and was left to wander aimlessly in the dark.

Or was it light?

''**Hey, would you do me a favor?**'' Naruto suddenly said, looking up at the Anbu.

''**Sir?**''

The anbu was obviously worried, after seeing his Hokage start barfing on the lawn. The man was even hovering at an abnormal range, his hands extended in a state that it seemed he was prepared to catch Naruto from a fall.

_Everyone thinks I'm so weak lately.._

''**Trade me clothes.**''

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R&R?

Until, next time!

hohoho


	3. Reunion

Thanks to the wonderful people who favorited this story, it really moved me to see people enjoying it. Also, a special thanks to xXMikomiUchihaXx for commenting! Woohoo, first commenter! I know my writting sucks compared to my friend's so I apologize if the Sasuke part doesn't do the job for you! Either way, please comment to let us know what you think!

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Sasuke's POV

Sasuke had taken his katana out, careful for any menacing chakras around. He had been polishing it for some time now, impatient but hesitant in the same time for the moment that the steal would cross the kistune's heart and rip it in little shreds.

Various dark thoughts kept playing in his head, as he was polishing his precious weapons.

He couldn't forget Naruto's persistent efforts to get him back because he could never get why the blonde was so obsessed with this. Any other human being would have just accepted that their friend had long been lost in darkness and would have let go and move on.

Sasuke was well aware he had lost his road back to a happy life but he didn't regret it. All he cared for was his revenge, until he died. He wasn't destined to live as other normal human beings with normal lives and without worries or huge past traumas that no amount of time or love could wash out.

Naruto would never get how Sasuke felt. Why he was shaped the way he was, why he did what he did. To Naruto it all seemed pointless. And it was. But Sasuke didn't care, his life did'nt have any point either way ever after his family had vanished.

He lived for their memory and his revenge. No one and nothing else.

Naruto was far from getting this and thus he'd pay for his foolishness. One should never play with the fire and if they can't put it out, they should at least run from themselves. But no Naruto had the hero syndrome, he had to shove the salvation down his head, either Sasuke had a say on this or not.

Sasuke couldn't put reason in his ex teammate, he had tried but it had been without use. Naruto was just too damn stubborn.

Sasuke never ever believed that his blonde rival would love him. He thought he only wanted to surpass him, to show off as a hero by bringing him back, that he had convinced himself that he loved Sasuke so as to feel as a better person, something he was not.

But all that was meaningless to him. He was actually a depressed scared traumatized little boy inside him, but no one could see. But he prefered it that way, since he was trying to come out as tough and strong in order to keep everyone out.

Thinking back on it, Naruto used to be important to the raven back at the time. And that was one of the reasons he left. If he could come to care for an annoying failure of a ninja that did nothing but mock him and antagonize him, then Sasuke must have been weak himself.

And he needed to be strong, for his revenge. Feelings were a luxury he couldn't afford to indulge into in his lonely life.

He snapped out of his thoughts, realizing he had been pointlessly polishing his weapons all this time since they were already sharp enough.

He hid his katana back under his robe, hanging it on his shoulder. He stood up, kind of taken aback by the long silence.

Even if himself was a cold and distant unsocial person, he was used to people talking all the time around him, was it his teammates, or enemies.

It wasn't often he stayed completely by himself, in absence of any human presence whatsoever. Even if he didn't want to admit it, he felt less lonely when people were around him.

He started walking around the cliffs, looking down at the village.

He could make out small figures passing by, to their houses, to the shops, to and off their jobs.

Konoha seemed too busy for such a small place.

But come to think of it Konoha wasn't unimportant at all, as it was one of the few powerful ninja villages in the whole known to them world.

Naruto's POV

Sometimes, Naruto thought he'd have been better off as Anbu rather than Hokage.

Albeit the current situation was making him feel like a cheap quitter, the opinion remained. His legs could stretch and maneuver freely unlike when he wore his coat, and the long-sleeved shirt? Wow. It actually breathed!

This inspired the fact that since he wasn't a real anbu, Naruto would eventually be back to having people hang on his every word in the stuffy office he dubbed hell, sorting out papers and dooming himself to endless paper cuts. Because he belonged in the office - forever and always.

Why couldn't he get that through his head? He had been selfishly thinking about himself and Sasuke lately, with their messed up past and how they both ended up. It wasn't right. And all Naruto had from the experience were regrets. Of not being faster, stronger, more perceptive.

But just because he was ******** up, didn't mean that he had the right to jeopardize the foundation of Konoha's future. If he ever did anything right, it would be to ensure that it would be around for years to come. There'd always be this guilt about Sasuke.

He knew he couldn't fix things. They'd probably never even see each other again. But he had to move on. He had to stand in front of his people, and act like nothing bothered him.

It was his duty.

''**I won't be gone long, all I want is some fresh air.**'' He added quickly, ''**And you can't come with me so..I'm..I'm gonna go.**''

Admittedly, just thinking about _him_ was like ripping out the stitches from a fresh wound again and again. Remembering them as kids... hearing Sasuke say his name...He couldn't stand it. At this rate, he'd never be whole.

''**I'll see you...**'' When? In an hour. Probably not. He didn't want to upset anyone but he needed space. ''**Just walk around for a bit, okay? Take the back roads. No one will know the difference.**''

''**But sir-**''

''**See ya!**'' His words were faltering because he doesn't have much of a plan. Blond hair juts out in patches from behind his mask, the only distinction of Naruto's golden appearance.

His feet are taking him someplace, someplace he doesn't even care to register. People are everywhere, but for the first time in months, no one stops him. It's kind of a relief actually. It would be a while before anyone realized his replacement wasn't him. So to Naruto, time seemed to stretch on in an endless expanse.

Beneath his mask, Naruto smiled. He felt so free, so calm. _Maybe I should go visit Sakura._

No, he wouldn't visit. Even thinking it he knew that the idea was a bad one. She would probably nag at him for missing work. Besides, she worked at a hospital now. Remember? Sakura was as busy as him!

He walked a little further until he spotted a sloping roof, immediately leaping up it's broken tiles and running along the tip of it's arch. He had no sense of restriction in these clothes, only the idea that he was going to have fun.

''**Maybe I'll go to the markets.**'' mumbling to himself, Naruto crept passed a window, listening to the distant rumble of someone's footsteps. Naturally, he ignored this, opting to jump back down into the street. Some people eyed him as he landed; probably questioning his intelligence(or the gold hair, not many had as bright a color as him), before continuing on.

A laugh broke his lips, erupting into a joyful sound as he strolled through the streets.. listening to what people said, and how they reacted to each other. It was brilliant, actually, to feel so normal again.

''**Yo, Anbu!**'' Naruto inclined his head, looking toward a shopkeeper with interest. The man was larger, and a bit more hairy than some. But his face was disgruntled, catching Naruto off guard.

''**Do so'good, would'ya? Kids keep prankin' meh round har.**''

Folding his arms, the pear-shaped man glared at Naruto, expecting some kind of response. But what was there to say? Don't worry, he'd protect the potatoes?

''**I'm on it.**'' He supplied. The man seemed startled at the sound of his voice, but didn't mention anything. Naruto, of course, took this as his chance to leave, and sprinted onward.

And by some stroke of luck, he felt it.

A sinking feeling. Like a stab at his heart, pulling him down to the mud. Naruto stopped dead in the center of the market, his eyes wide. What was this feeling? This sense of worry? Naruto tried to look at each of the passing faces, but found few people left on the street. As a last resort, Naruto looked upward, toward the past Hokages' images. A wind ruffled through, shifting his hair at an awkward angle. But he didn't notice. All he could think was...

_Something's going on._

Sasuke's POV

Sasuke looked down at the village once more, his hand clenching onto the cold steal.  
An anbu figure seemed to be watching the mountains carefully, which made him anxious for some moments. Could it be that someone had recognized him and had informed the Konoha elders? This wasn't good.

Something,though, about this figure seemed familiar. The way he stood, they way he looked towards the cliffs. There was a weird aura around him, he could swear he had it felt before somewhere.  
And his hair…was golden blonde. So much like the color of someone he knew…

Could it be Naruto? No, wait, Naruto would never mask as an Anbu and go out freely in the village like that. He was a strictly guarded as far as Sasuke was informed. But knowing Naruto he had it in him to be wild and naively bold like that.

And come to think of it, wasn't it in those plains, the hokages heads that his old friend had made his first prank before he had enrolled into the ninja academy ? He still remembered that day, not without a feeling of melancholy stinging his heart.

He still remembered how upset everyone at the village and at the ninja school was with the little ''cursed'' boy, how mad Iruka was and how disappointed in Naruto he made himself out to be.

Yet now, Naruto was a hokage . Sasuke admired the blonde for his route so far and considered him a worthy rival, able to compete with his power.

And this is what made the fight even more exciting. All he had to hope for was to find it in his cold heart to not give in to the memories or feelings Naruto could wake up inside him, upon their reunion.

His thoughts reverting back to the ANBU , his stress returned ten fold and snapped him out of his deep thoughts.

He clenched his fists and walked away from the edge of the cliffs, as he climbed onto a tree and hid in its branches, planning his next move if that person was really after him and did plan to go up alone or with help-the latter more expected if he was really an anbu- to hunt his head down.

Suddenly, a thought made him freeze in agony,as his eyes fell on his akatsuki vest he wore from under his black robe. There was a good sized piece of its right down edge torn.

It must have been when he was climbing up the hills, having his outter robe untied, so the vest had come in direct contact with the rocky surface and thus it had been trimmed so much that a piece of it was torn.

And where could that piece have fallen now? How stupid could he have been to not notice it before? If someone found signs of akatsuki around, they would be alert on in no time.

Now, he knew what this anbu was on about.  
He probably had found the piece. But he couldn't leave now and cross the village again,or he'd get caught if they already knew.  
Going the opposite way wouldn't work either, seeing as he had no food or water with him and the road back to another human civilization close enough was pretty long and deserted.

He sighed in agony, he really shouldn't have based on his fortune so much. He never had much anyways and he should have known better ever after he happened to be born in a family that was slaughtered from their own member.

Naruto's POV

He should be turning away. Be marching right back to his office, and forget about this feeling. Yea, that's what he _should_ do. But he didn't. Couldn't.

Naruto studied the faces of his Hokage, mesmerized by their features. Each one seemed a lot older than himself, so much more prepared. In retrospect, the blond presumed to be nothing more than a spec compared to them. They all had the makings of great courage and leadership... Naruto didn't think he could do half the things they did. So what led him to chose this life in the first place? He wanted to try. Be remembered, like them. Be admired. It had been exactly four years since he took over as Hokage.

The disbelief, confusion and surprise was still vivid in his mind. Now, he found that a little bit of horror was mixed in, too. Looking back, all he could see was Sakura's awarding smile, Kakashi's smug expression. And naturally, all he could hear was the joined voices as they congratulated him, or sang with joy. They thought he was going to make things so much better. Magically attain all the answers.

Naruto also remembers that his training ended that day, and how he'd always wondered if he had taken on this role a bit too soon.

_What's that?_

Catching sight of something fluttering in the wind, Naruto studied it for a long moment, pensive. Eventually, it peeled itself from the face of the rock, permitting he watch as it fell right into the sky. On instinct, the boy's heart beat with the tempo of the falling piece, depicting another sense of dread for the situation.

Naruto couldn't help it. His body coiled downward then, blue eyes captured on the bit as he leapt straight up into the air. When he reached the top of his jump, the boy stretched. His fingers grazed the soft fabric before snatching it. When he landed, Naruto eyed his treasure, gasping for breath. _Is this...?_ Glaring up to the faces, Naruto paused. Atasuki couldn't be here. He'd ensured Konoha of that long ago!

''**Dammit.**'' His shoulder stung from the stretch, but he ignored it. He had bigger problems at the moment. This piece of fabric was evidence to that. Naruto felt a headache coming on with this knowledge, because dealing with the cloaked sort meant lots of trouble.

The smart thing to do would be to go and get help. But that would mean tattling on himself, and being locked up in his office. He wouldn't get to see if the Atasuki were trying to invade Konoha, or if they were plotting something bigger. No, that wouldn't calm his concerns. But it should be what he was doing.

''**Just a quick look,**'' he promised. No harm could come from that, right? Naruto scaled the mountain in a matter of minutes, whimpering once when he cut his palm on a jagged rock.

Thus, he made quick work of wrapping his hand with the cloth, bundling his palm. The sun made things a bit harder up here, but with a little perserverence, he reached his destination.

This was probably the worst friggin' idea he'd ever had.

''**.. Show yourself!**''

Sasuke's POV

Sasuke's loneliness and peaceful silence was suddenly invaded by sounds of someone climbing the rocky hills and the sense of a familiar chakra filling the area around.  
It was a strong kind of chakra , one he knew very well and would never forget, no matter how much time would pass.

His heart started racing faster. Could this really be Naruto? His chakra and sounds alert followed the sound of his voice, echoing around with a weird unseen strength Sasuke hadn't witnessed in his past friend before.

It seemed as if the years of working as a Hokape had paid off for Naruto's personal growth and the once stupid ninja was now an intimidating rival.

Sasuke could now lay his curious eyes on the anbu figure, that was letting out such a familiar aura.

Now that he had heard his voice, even if it had matured somehwat since the last time he had heard it, he was sure that this very voice belonged to Naruto.

His onyx eyes shining with primal instinct, he observed better as the man moved around the the rocks.

A sly smirk made its way up to his face, as his hand slid down under his robe and clenched on his katana.

This would be interesting: Naruto in an anbu form.

Last time he checked he was still a Hokage. If Sasuke had to take a wild guess, he'd say that probably, he was just going around fooling everyone in order to steal some brief deeply desired freedom.

Maybe Sasuke himself wasn't one but he could only guess how busy a Hokage ought to be, given that even mere ninjas of low ranks were never left in peace, either, filled with constant difficult or easy missions.  
After all, he had worked for Konoha once. He knew how the story went.

He moved around the branch and jumped down silently, so that Naruto wouldn't hear him or notice any light movement . He stayed hidden using the thick chain of trees in front of him as coverage.  
Staring at Naruto silently, like a snake watching its prey, he took two kunai out, throwing them from two different directions towards the blond, never ceasing to move around in his great speed.  
The point wasn't to attack him or scare him. This would only alert him after all.

What he wanted to do was two things: first, cause the anbu mask to fall off-which he managed with the second kunai while Naruto was busy dodging the first-after all they came from two totally different directions- and second check if Naruto had come up there with any other force or guardians to get him down. Once attacking their hokage, he knew how anbu would work.

They wouldn't be able to resist but fall in the battle in order to protect their Hokage. Then again you couldn't be sure, and that's why he was willing to take his risks with it.

Coming all alone to Konoha for the hokage's murder was enough of a great risk on its own.

He started making his way to Naruto from behind, silently and cooly, sure that the blonde couldn't spot him just yet in his great speed. His steps as soft as ever, he made no wrong moves on the ground.

He had caught a glimpse of Naruto's tanned face before, the second the mask had dropped to the dusty hard dry ground.

He expected the moment he'd meet with his past teammate for his heart to go racing in astral speed and emotions of melancholy, regrets and past caring fill him , but nothing of the sort happened and now he was walking silently and steadily in a calm way towards his prey, as if nothing else mattered in the world other than his aim.

Yep, when it really came down to it, Sasuke was a professional at what he did…or was he?

With one swift move, he was inches away from Naruto, his chest facing the blonde's back.

Now he was sure that the fifth Hokage could feel him but it was too late anymore.  
In a matter of seconds, he unsheathed his katana and placed it in front of Naruto's neck and chest, holding it tightly with his right hand, while he pressed the blond ninja's back against his chest with his free hand.

For some reason, his pale hands were shaking in the physical contact but his husky voice didn't, when he whispered in Naruto's ear, brushing his lips lightly against his earlobe.

''Long time no see, …Hokage.'' he said, his voice dripping from sarcasm but in the same time a hint of honest emotion.

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Plox, comment?

_

**Comment and save a life! Muhahhaha jk!**

Sasuke: Yeah…okay…_R&R _sounds more proper, don't you think? -.-

Me: I don't like typicalities, plus no one is going to comment no matter how I phrase it, either way! Gee, you smartass!

Sasuke: Then why do you keep on posting this?

Me:…Huh! Oh god you should just be thankful I put you in the story, you teme! So now hush yourself!

Naruto: Hey! Only I can call Sasuke-teme that!

Sasuke: *sigh*

Me: Uh, I think I forgot my line, damn you guys! Aaah… Oooohh, yeah, that's it! :

Until next time!


	4. Confrontation

Thanks to the people who reviewed me. Your comments are most appreciated!

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Naruto's POV

The blond hokage knew that something like this was inevitable. But when it actually happened? He was still shocked. It was one of those things that you didn't want to believe would happen, that you could put off until the last minute when it was rudely shoved into your face and you were forced to face the fact. Not alone, though. Naruto had never thought he'd be caught by himself.

I mean, sure. He'd had his suspicions when it came to the loyalty of his ninja, but he'd never questioned anything. Never thought he'd had the reason. After all, who would be stupid enough to attack the nine-tailed fox? _s**t!_

Sensing the first attack, Naruto ducked, giving plenty room to dodge a proceeding hit in the same direction. Though he was not on good terms when the second knocked him in the face; forcibly removing his mask. Time seemed to slow as the mask fell, it's cracked exterior colliding with hard rock as Naruto stood, shocked, at how quickly someone had hit him. The amount of force was impeccable, and the speed... it was-

It had to be him.

Without even sensing all that chalkra, or even trying, he just knew. Sasuke's presence hung like a palpable air, tremoring in his bones. Naruto could never forget a thing about it. His attention raked the nearby trees, thinking that he might be hiding in one of them. He wanted to speak, but no words escaped. All he could think, all he could breathe, was the other's name.

_Is this a dream?_ He found it hard to keep from smiling. A crazy, naive grin that had to be his most honest expression in a long time. His body twisted, kicking up rubble as he tried to get the lay of his surroundings. Blue orbs bore into everything with a new intensity, thinking that if he stared hard enough.. Sasuke would appear in front of him. Because he had to see it for his own eyes. He had to know!

Did Sasuke Uchiha really come home?

He'd had all this happiness pent up inside of him, it was impossible to believe that it could all come flowing out at one time. He had always been that way around Sasuke, though. Naruto didn't understand it, nor did he want to. It was simply part of the other's affect. That's all. He knew he probably looked stupid, a bit of blood drooling on his cheek from where the mask was hit, grinning like an idiot when death was imminent. But Naruto didn't care. It seemed nothing could make him care. Because Sasuke was back!

And before he could react to what he knew was coming, a murderously sharp weapon stroked his chest and neck. A hand crept along his side, pulling him closer to the figure behind him. Naruto blinked, doe-shaped eyes widening. In all his excitement, he'd forgot this was a battle. Which meant, he'd just lost. Well, wait! He wasn't winning, but Naruto certainly wasn't going to admit defeat, either! He was quite the fighter and had kept himself in shape, however exhausted he may be. And with every second, Naruto could feel his chest getting tighter, the ache for his missing friend getting bigger. People fought harder when they had something to fight for. That's what Tsunadi had said. But what happens when they didn't want to fight at all?

When the words slipped from those pale lips, Naruto felt a part of his heart stop. Naruto had every intention of finding Sasuke.. and look. Here he was. It was almost justifiable, in a sense. How long had he been trying to find him?

''**... Sasuke.**''

The word tumbled from his mouth, unable to be kept inside. Sasuke's voice was deeper than all those years ago, firmer. Naruto's head tilted in the opposite direction from his attacker, eyes captured on the sword resting at his chest.

He could feel the dull warmth of the steal, barely cutting into his chest. But Naruto wasn't scared. He'd taken a lot more than a simple cut. His hands clenched into fists, useless in the current position.

''**Are you..are you real?**'' he whispered. What a stupid thing to ask. Naruto knew better than this! So why was he holding his breath?

Suddenly, his leg swept backward, attempting to wrap around the Uchiha's. He leant forward, into the sword, and raised his bandaged hand to tug it out of his way. When he'd rolled out of the hold, bleeding and gasping for air, Naruto planted a knee to the ground and looked up.

_He wants to kill me!_ Blue captured pure obsidian, startled by the others' porcelain features. It took everything Naruto had not to run right back into those arms, knowing at his current rate, he would no doubt lose.

Sasuke's POV

Sasuke was startled when such a question came out of the blonde's lips. What a thing to ask after such a long time they hadn't seen each other. But it's not that which bothered him. But the emotion with which Naruto let it slip out of his fine lips.

He'd expect Naruto to be vicious and unforgiving to him when he'd seen him again after such a long time, bitter for his betrayal, with a flaming hatred and aim to revenge him. But what Sasuke always refused to believe was that the boy loved him truly and genuinely and was the only and one reason behind his every actions.

But before he had time to respond, he felt the blonde's leg attempting to wrap around his own and he moved his leg back in a flash, causing the blonde to trip and fall forwards, Sasuke's katana cutting superficial wounds across his chest.

He didn't plan on hurting him ever so soon, but it seemed as if the dobe hadn't changed so much after all and was still the same emotional clumsy idiot he had known ever since the ninja academy.

Sasuke watched down his tan shaky figure, as the blonde's eyes bored into his cold black ones.  
If Naruto wasn't to fight back, it only made it harder for him to resist to his ever protesting conscience.

He stayed still, refusing to break eye contact. It was over his powers. Now that he had the chance again to look into his ex teammate's eyes, he couldn't stop taking pleasure from the familiar optimism and energy they were giving out. Even if he was loud and annoying at times, somehow, Naruto was the one who had givencolor to Sasuke's ''grey'' life, back then.

His eyes slowly sliding from Naruto's cerulean ones to his wounded chest, he regained his composure and answered coldly:

''Judging from the scratch on your chest,… yeah…, I'd say I am real.'' he said, his eyes returning to Naruto's ones, not wanting to miss the emotion in them.

Without leaving him any more time to react, he said  
''I am here to kill you, Naruto.'' he said emotionlessly and if words could kill, then his were like shurikens aiming coldly for his prey's heart.

He didn't fear Naruto for the time being. If he did decide he would like to finally get up and fight him, he was able to dodge him just as easily and fast.

A small wave of air blew around the hills, and Sasuke's hair swayed lightly around his face for some brief seconds, giving to him an even darker look.

He leaned his face slightly downwards, thinking he'd let Naruto at least stand up before he attacked him again.

After his initial ''hello'' attack, it was time to get serious about it and do what he went there for.

''Of course, you can always quit your leader position and I'll be relieved to spare your life.'' Sasuke said, wanting to test Naruto's persistence.

He knew Naruto wasn't a coward and therefore he'd refuse it, but it was fun teasing him.

He broke their eye contact again to scan the area around for any anbu. He could feel no other chakras besides his and Naruto's.

He looked back at the blonde Hokage, observing his tanned handsome face as it was surrounded by his blonde frizzy locks, care freely shading it.  
If nothing, he was an image of false innocence and foolish bravery.

Somehow, he admired Naruto for having insane guts. Now if only he could combine them with brains, he wouldn't be there now, risking his life with his enemy.

He closed the distance slowly between them and looked down on Naruto with something as of a hostile expression coloring his pale characteristics.

He closed his eyes for a moment as if he was trying to find some peace inside him and then he reopened them, extending his hand to the boy on the ground as of an act of help and of a deal in the same time.

''Fight me.''

Naruto's POV

In an instant, he saw Sasuke. To be specific, not _this_ Sasuke, but all of his incarnations. The small child with a crooked smile and a pinky promise. As a pre-teen, with a frozen touch and prodigetic talent. In teenage-dom, perfect yet traitorous. And now.. a total stranger. Someone who reflected a face Naruto cared for; a person he'd failed.

Slowly, the hokage was beginning to recognize that he wasn't here on a permenant stay. But it didn't keep him from wishing. Never would. Because as much as someone might expect Sasuke to be a ruthless, heartless b*****d.. Naruto always saw what he use to be, and what they'd been as kids.

''**S..Shuddup.**''

The point Sasuke made was a good one. The hokage had asked such a stupid question, it was sketchy that he even be rewarded with a response at all. It also made him realize that they were far from any source of help; though he could have very well run back in the opposite direction, in viewing limit of Konoha. In fact, it would have been logical. But he didn't. Why? Because he was foolish. And too enamored by this encounter to risk losing the Uchiha.

''**I won't let you hurt anyone.**''

All face, all show. With those words, the blond tried to done his hardest mask, despite how easily it fell apart under Sasuke's withering stare. Naruto had always wanted to give people the benefit of the doubt. Even if those people had nearly killed him in the past. But Sasuke had also been a traitor, so like it or not.. he had to pretend that he believed-

''_I am here to kill you, Naruto._''

And all at once, his world fell apart.

Naruto raked his head for alternatives to what was said, but found none. In fact, the blond was so shaken by the words, he fell backward onto his rear. Then froze. His clumsiness had always cost him many things, that much he knew. A good grade, an unscarred body, chances in general. But suddenly, he felt as if he couldn't handle it. If anything, he felt like he'd been slapt in the face.

_Keep it together, you idiot!_ He would have preferred if this didn't happen, if he didn't have to face this monster. Yet he prepared himself anyway, eyes burning with a hidden passion and unmistakable fury that kindled from fear. Still, he didn't run. Because unfortunately, losing Sasuke frightened him much more than dying in the heat of battle.

''**Give up?**''

Naruto's voice was clipped. He was putting up any emotional barrier he could manage, while he scrambled for a way to get out of this. To be frank, he was much too tired, too worn down, too _everything_ to get far. And consequently growled in frustration.

''**Relief?**''

Why did he have to make this so hard? Naruto studied Sasuke, not believing a word of what was said. It had to be a jest. Mockery. Sasuke didn't care about his welfare. Somehow, the fox-container used this as a fuel to his hurt. His heart beat wildly, pumping adrenaline into his veins and prying that warm light from his gaze.

_He's here to kill me._

It was stated like a fact. Naruto repeated the words like a mantra, even as a wind crippled past. Not once did his eyes ever stray from the Uchiha, not even when the man took on a more sadistic and deviant expression.

Because he still hoped.

''**Is that all you came for?**'' Nevertheless, the hokage paid little attention to the value of his life. Attended such frail regard, one might think he didn't care at all. The fact that his chest ached from the shallow wound whenever he breathed in too quickly, added to this.

So instead, he paid attention to the task at hand—no matter how much it pained him (literally and metaphorically). Naruto figured that, whether or not he might die soon, he should do something to help his village. His reign had been fairly short lived and totally eventless (which was the way he preferred it). Taking out Sasuke, or even slowing him down like this, would be the greatest act he ever gave.

''**Then take your best shot.**''

Sasuke's POV

Sasuke looked at Naruto emotionless as the blonde repeated his words or the meaning close to what he had said.

Yeah, give up pretty much summed it up.

What about the relief part didn't fit in though? But of course, thinking of it Sasuke realized that Naruto couldn't find it easy to believe that the monster the Uchiha had become could ever bring himself to care for him.

Sasuke didn't care, or that's what he told himself. Actually the most ridiculous excuse he used to repeat inside him whenever he felt guilty for being sentimental towards Naruto was that it wasn't Naruto who should really pay for Konoha. But then again who was? He represented them, killing the fith all mighty hokage would be a revenge towards the whole ninja village.

And in addition to that, no matter of how soulless the raven haired villain was, he wasn't in it for it to terminate a whole village, not yet ,at least.

''Trust me, I won't take pleasure in your death. It is just my path of an avenger and you are standing like an obstacle in it. Simple as that. ''Sasuke said coldly, pretending it really didn't mean a lot to him, but inside him his heart was a bit aching.

Even if he had convinced himself that the blonde had no place in his heart, he knew things wouldn't be the same once they wouldn't breath the same air, once Naruto was gone...

The next question came as off shock to him. What did Naruto mean if that was all. What else did he expect? To run and kneel in front of him, asking for his forgiveness.

Sasuke smirked sadistically at that, nothing showing his real emotions. If for different occasions, he wouldn't mind spending some time out of fight with the dobe, but now he was his aim and he was the avenger.  
He still couldn't understand why Naruto clang on to his hopes so much. He really had only proved so far that he was a traitorous evil and selfish b*****d to the blond. So why, or even better, _what _did Naruto base his hopes on till now? Well, if for failing before to cut him off, today was the day he would, and even maybe literally.

He took a step forwards to take Naruto's soft hand in his, helping him to stand up.

It was less an act of help and more one of agreement and confirmation of the deal Naruto had accepted when he said the last words.

Sasuke's onyx eyes bore into Naruto's, the two bodies only inches away.  
He examined his face carefully, fearless, as if nothing he could find in those eyes could affect him.

He slowly let Naruto's hand go and trickled his pale fingers from Naruto's wound on his chest up to his tanned face.

The wound didn't seem deep. But look what clumsiness did.

Even if he knew he was the one really more in risk, he was willing to risk it all in this day. Especially if that meant getting an advantage in this _dangerous _battle.

His long fingers brushed softly upwards against Naruto's soft cheeks. His youthful skin felt so nice on his touch, so familiar and distant in the same time.

Letting his hand fall lazily onto Naruto's right shoulder , his cheek almost brushed slowly against Naruto's, as he leaned his head in closer to whisper huskily in his left ear, his lips haunting over his earlobe.

-In the meantine, his free hand had been busy untying the laces of his black robe and the Akatsuki one under it.-

''As you wish...''. Not before the sound of his voice had even faded completely in Naruto's ears, he jumped on a tree some meters away in a flash, leaving the clothes fall in the ground in front of Naruto,as if a reminder of whom had been standing there a few seconds ago.

He had done this to confuse and startle Naruto right from the start of the battle as so to gain an advantage.

Knowing Naruto being so emotional when it came to Sasuke himself, he knew the blonde would probably be startled when Sasuke demonstrated that sudden physical familiarity with him. This would gain him time to do other things with his hands while Naruto's mind was busy thinking other things.

And this wasn't the only thing he had put his hand onto.

He stood on a branch, silent and perfectly still, his breath almost inexistent, as he watched Naruto, waiting patiently but not without a little stress for a sudden or any attempt of the blond to attack him.

Naruto's POV

_..What happened to us?_

Naruto looked up into Sasuke's face one last time, trying to find any reaction to what'd been decided. One seconds, two seconds. That's how long he waited. Unfortunatly, it seemed that the last shred of emotion had left the young assasin long ago, and even though Naruto never doubted him, he would not be spared a glimpse of remorse. Because now, Naruto had become an obstacle. Nothing more than an object to be conquered.

The boy opened his mouth to say something about it, but found no words could form. And hence, he showed the understanding in a different way; by letting his hand be grasped by the dark man's for the briefest of moments, while relishing in the electricity that stung him afterward. It seemed no matter how many times they met, each one was always just as bitter as the previous, maybe even angrier.

Of course, this meeting was rather unique and underlined with finality, but it was melancholy all the same.

When Naruto pulled back, a weak smile instantly graced the Hokage's face. Because even in the face of death.. he had no regrets.

''**Don't lie to me. You're a terrible liar.**'' he murmured softly. Wrapping an arm around his small yet muscled waist, it appeared he might be trying to hold himself together.

''**You won't miss **_**me**_** at all.**'' He was always looking for Sasuke. Always trying to catch his attention. So it was a symbolic ending, he guessed. Dying under the one he'd lived for. And considering the look that he had gotten, he was right.

Naruto's jaw tightened as Sasuke looked at him; a strong, impossible mask that Naruto wished he could remove just as easily as the Anbu one. So, in a last ditch effort to patch things up, he tried to express emotions for what the other wouldn't, a twinge of guilt and misery lacing over him like a broken promise.

''**.. wait.. I-**''

He didn't understand why Sasuke inspected his wound, but remained frozen all the same. I mean, what else could he do? His hand itched to touch the dark tresses that fell into his face, but knew better than to try. He'd almost expected a stab in the back, for even thinking such things. Anything in fact. Some sort of ripping pain that would end his life. Pale lids fluttered closed, reveling in the silence.

_I don't want to die._ He wanted to scream the words out loud. This just wasn't fair! It's not right! Can't we hold on a second here? Naruto's cheek tilted into the fingers without knowing, almost seeming to embrace the touch. When it ended, he fell stagment again, a statue against everything Sasuke represented.

Those sweet words circled in his ear, brushing away any idea Naruto might have conjured on the spot. _This wasn't what I wanted!_ Trembling, Naruto glared at the clothes that had fallen to the floor. He knew the game had begun- cat vs. mouse. So, in correspondence, the boy knelt down aside the cloaks, eyes watering.

''**Don't hold back, Teme.**'' Naruto ran his fingers along the back of the dark patterns, trying to ignore the rush of memories that came with their owner. When he felt he had a better composure, the boy stood again, cloaks in hand, and thrust them into the air. And just like Sasuke, he vanished under their passing.

The blond leapt high into the air, attention lingering on his feet. His hands joined to make a wild variety of symbols; most of the defensive variety. A number of clones disappeared into the surroundings, ready to pop out or provide a distraction when necessary.

Naruto didn't plan to do much, but was glad that he had disguised himself as an anbu. A shuriken weighed heavily in his palm, acting as a ready shot as he came back down, landing on a slope of rock. Blue eyes ran flippantly to the nearby trees, but made no move for cover. Made no move to do _anything_, actually.

He just.. stood there.

_Come on, Teme. This is what you wanted._

_

* * *

  
_

_R&R?_

_Sasuke: I thought you said you didn't like typicallities?_

_Me:…Depends on the mood, really._

_Sasuke: Make up your mind. You sound stupid, you know that?_

_Me: Remind me why I still haven't kicked you out of my story?_

_Sasuke: Pfftt…cause you're a fan girl._

_Me: Whhaaat?!!! Listen jerk, if you want to know I am a lez!_

_Sasuke: Yeah, right._

_Me: Exactly!_

_Sasuke: You can always prove that, you know._

_Me: Hey, I don't need to prove anything to you! Uh…wait,what do you mean?_

_Sasuke: Me and you, alone, in your room…you can tell the rest._

_Me: Wtf, you pervert, are you trying to seduce me now?_

_Sasuke: You do are a lesbian, afterall._

_Me: -.- I'd punch you right now if you were real, you know that?_

_Naruto: Don't worry, Ria-chan, I shall kick his ass pretty nice next chapter!_

_Me: Yeah, sure thing. *rolls eyes*_

_Naruto: Wait, what was that supposed to mean?_

_Sasuke: *__chuckle__*_

_Naruto: Hey, teme! Do you know something I don't?! I will do kick your ass next chapter, won't I?_

_Sasuke: * Stares at me* *cough cough*_

_Me: __ …_

_Naruto: Hey!!_

_Me: Until next time!_


	5. Fight

Thank you for the comments. I love them!

* * *

Sasuke's POV

Sasuke looked as Naruto created his countless clones and spread them around the trees, in a pointless attempt to create confusion.

Sasuke smirked. This wouldnt do. He had seen Naruto using the same technicque many times ago and it didn't phase him anymore. He knew how to react to that and how to work his way around.

Somehow, though, watching him fearless and relaxed as the blonde prepared his defense against his enemy, the hokage's words repeated themselves inside Sasuke's head.

_''You won't miss me at all.''_  
He didnt know why but those words annoyed him. Sasuke Uchiha was known to be a selfish brat but not a liar in the same time.

And even though Naruto had every reason to doubt him, seeing as Sasuke was the one coming after his head, deep down he knew it wasn't true. That somewhere in his traumatized heart, he'd ache for Naruto when he'd gone, in his own unreadable weird way.

Sasuke's eyes narrowed, as he snapped out of his annoying thoughts, watching as Naruto stood as an open aim on a rock.

There had to be a trick behind this, he thought.

The clones didnt seem to do a good job spotting him, he had only encountered two so far, spying him on his branch and he had eliminated them into mere air with the rapid throw of a kunai.

As far as it concerned Sasuke, he didn't want to give Naruto, the hokage and ex teammate, a painful or torturing death. Actually, he wanted to make it as easy as possible but he had never dared to think a hokage would let him have it just like that. But then again, with Naruto, it was a whole different situation and not so different in the same time.

When feelings got in the middle...things turned out more complicated.

Still knowing the blonde, he had great amounts of stored pride inside him, which was by far what had given him the motivation to make it to the top of Konoha's food chain.

He could handle him a straight forward attack and take him down as he stood on that very rock there, but he thought this could be as well either a cheap clone or a substitute that would turn to rock or wood when the first kunai would strike its aim.

What did he have to lose in any case? He had come to risk his life, and that meant he had to accept defeat and even death if he was willing to fight the hokage in the first place.

For one thing, he knew that this fight had to be brief. The anbus would be alarmed pretty soon when they noticed their hokage was absent for a weirdly long time and they'd come out seeking for him.

For a moment, the thought of hypnotizing him and dragging him to a place where they could carry on their fight unbothered seemed appealing to him.

But then again, he could hypnotize him and kill him on the spot for all he cared. It sounded easier and faster. But something of the like wasn't in him. His pride would be terribly hurt if he couldn't prove to Naruto that he could defeat him in full battle.

If things got worse with the anbus, he could always make a deal with Naruto and knowing him he probably wouldn't refuse.

Not wasting any more time in thoughts, as time was precious to the fight, in a flash he stood in front of the rock Naruto was standing on.

He leaned his head slightly upwards to get better view of him.

He didnt have to go all the way there to find out. A simple kunai and he'd know. But if this was indeed a trick he thought that was what Naruto would have wanted him to do, so as to spot his current position.

Might as well walk out himself, if that was the case. And so he did.  
If Naruto was to come to him from any other direction, he knew better to expect and dodge it.

He jumped on the same rock the Naruto figure was on and unseathed his katana.

Naruto didn't seem phased, and Sasuke knew better to not pay attention to this.

He covered the distance between them, their breaths mixing, as he ran the edge of his katana softly against Naruto's wound.

''It's a foolish trick, isn't it?'' he asked, with an ironic smirk on his face, waiting for Naruto to attack him from his in front or any other direction possible at any given moment.

Naruto's POV

He could feel them. His clones. The few that managed to stumble across Sasuke, he could feel them as soon as they died. He also knew the instant their chakra slipped back into the air, and became nothing. However, his focus remained trained on the one section where the most clones had gathered; barely noting how they looked to him for orders. When he uttered nothing of value, several vanished into the trees, while the others made sure to hover nearby. This was not a fight he intended on winning, they realized, merely on stalling.

_He found me._ To be honest, the hokage saw the katana in Sasuke's hand before he saw _him_. He did not flinch away from either, simply stood his ground. A gust of wind ruffled his disheveled hair, while one hand gripped the shuriken, ready to use. In a whim, he couldn't help but memorize the rough outline of Sasuke's form, poised and cold. Naruto let out a belittled sigh, letting both of his hands sway against the wind.

''**Took you long enough.**'' he said,

''**You get lost or somethin'?**''

Naruto's grin was wide, childish. Though his overall expression was rather tired. He looked down at Sasuke, then snorted. He wasn't taking this threat very seriously. After all, why should he? Yes, he was closer to dying now than two minutes ago. But, for some reason, the hokage was seeing this as some sort of joke. So much for bravery in the face of death, eh?

_It's not over._

the blonde presented Sasuke with a shake of the head, acknowledging this fact. His weapon shook in his hand, daring him to make a move. If he were going to do anything against Sasuke, he figured, now would be the time.

Too bad he still wasn't much for planning.

The hokage leaned forward slightly with the soft slice, breath catching on a dribble of blood. Blue eyes locked with black once again, permitting his smile twitch to a lower degree. The cut didn't hurt much, sure, but when re-slicing his already existing one..? Naruto wouldn't deny it hurt a bit more than it should.

''**Yes, it is.**'' He was lying. But hey. If Sasuke was allowed to do it, why couldn't he? The man raised an arm, thrusting the shuriken forward. His chest protested the movement, but he ignored that about as much as everything else. A soft whimper parted from his lips, yet the boy continued to try his best to strike at the Uchiha.

A few clones darted up from their remaining positions; mocking their creator with a growl. It was moments before the first actually took a swing at Sasuke from behind, while the other's alternated between ideas of kicking, or pulling Naruto back to safety.

_We have to finish this quickly, or else..._

His friends. _Their_ friends, to be more precise. They would start wondering where Naruto was soon. Probably were already. Guilt washed over him when he thought about the chances of being found by Sakura… her horror - stricken gaze washed out by tears alone.

It was enough to make him feel like scum, though he didn't stray from the blade. Didn't avoid his attacker, or try to do much more than his previous strike. Pride or not, Naruto was ready for this. He needed it, actually. In Konoha.. he was miserable. He could barely handle paperwork without withering away, or smile at people with unkempt strain behind his laugh.

His other hand felt an alerting shock start to throb throughout it, a heat that rose up his forearm and into his heart. It was the start of his Rasengan, something he didn't even consider conjuring enough to attack with. Sasuke was too close for any type of move like that, lest, important to him in general.

''**.. You always have to win, don't you?**''

Sasuke's POV

''Shut up.''Sasuke ordered in his bold but emotionless voice. He didn't like people playing with him but something inside him told him that this was the real Naruto by the way the blonde's face grimaced lightly when his katana slid up his reopened now wound.

Feeling his tension slightly rise as he could feel the dobe's clones gathering around him some in order to attack him and others in order to defend him, he realized Naruto was lying:

''You might be a foolish liar, but you were no coward last time I checked.'' he said huskily, leaning slightly closer to him, the katana digging a tad bit deeper into the superficial rash, causing more blood drops to roll down the hokage's bare chest.

Then, noticing Naruto's calm expression, almost serene, something in Sasuke tingled. Did the dobe think this was just a game that he could have fun with? No, letting the blonde idiot take him lightly was the least of the things he'd ever dreamed off.

Angered with Naruto's foolish fearless attitude- he didn't know if it was because he dared take him lightly or because he didn't enjoy the fact that Naruto wasn't going to do anything to protect himself against him, he let out a sadistic smirk, his attention gathering to Naruto's hands, where something as the start of a rasengan appeared to start its formation.

Then, hearing Naruto's last words, his onyx unreadable eyes shifted back into cerulean one's, not without something as slight frustration.

A simple rasengan wasn't going to be effective against him but the more he thought about the hokage's moves so far the more it seemed to Sasuke as if the blonde boy didn't have any urge to fight him.

He seemed emotionally worn out. What had happened to Naruto while he was away? The past optimism and energy he had acknowledged in his former friend seemed absent now from the blonde guy that was standing in front of him.

And this was angering him. It made it harder for his slumberous conscience to attack him as ruthlessly and emotionlessly as he had planned to many weeks ago.

''It is only cause you let me do so.' 'he said and not leaving him any more time to react, he jumped in a flash highly in the air over his previous post and dodged the clones that were gathering around and behind him with swift throws of multiple and well aimed kunai.

Landing as fast behind Naruto, he captured the blonde's wrist tightly in his hands and flipped his arms behind his back, dragging his back against his chest all in the same time.

Getting hold of both wrists with one hand, he used his free hand to pull out a poisoned kunai and placed it on Naruto's lowest part of neck.

Naruto didn't seem to do any protest so far and this was only fueling his actions.

He leaned his head down on Naruto's neck and let his nose brush against the blonde's skin, slowly as he took in his scent.

''Is this the scent of defeat? Cause it is all over you, Naruto.'' he whispered in a slow tone.

He jerked the blonde harder against his chest, his grip tightening on his thin wrists, as he ran the small but dangerous kunai from his collar bone to his chest. The little sharp item came to a halt right above Naruto's heart and dug superficially in the spot.

''In case you want to know, I watered this kunai with poison I gathered especially for you. You see, my longing to kill you was as much. But little did I know the real Naruto I once knew, was already dead.'' Sasuke said, raising his head to look into Naruto's eyes from the side, his face taken over by an arrogant insulting expression as if he was trying to wake him up and provoke him to fight - give his best shot.

His hand holding the kunai was slightly shaking, he wasn't still accustomed to the idea of ending Naruto's life with his own hands. And mostly when Naruto was passive as he was now. He was making it too hard for him and he cursed inside him for getting so emotional.

gear. No doubt that the raven could tell, being as close as he was.

There was only one way to make Naruto take him seriously, right now.  
If he didn't care for himself, the hokage would sure care for the village he was ruling, though.

Sasuke leaned his face over Naruto's neck again, his eyes slowly taken over by the sharingan as he felt his anger growing bigger the more apathetic Naruto stayed.

Closing his eyes, he took in Naruto's scent once more. It felt so mesmerizing, so magnetizing- as it did in the past though he'd never admit it- and as from an instinct he didn't know he possessed inside him, he dove his teeth in the hokage's neck, biting him a bit roughly and sucking the bruised skin with his thin lips in the same time.

Parting his mouth from the young but tired boy's skin, Sasuke whispered emotionlessly.

''If you want me to kill you just as simply, I won't protest. I bet it'd be more fun to slaughter the entire Konoha afterwards. They surely will express more fear than their brave hokage.'' he whispered, his hot breath still ghosting over Naruto's tanned neck.

Naruto's POV

His hands were still shaking. He hated that. The aching twang that hammered into his joints because it too closely resembled the throbbing agony in his chest. A ferocious animal had ripped everything from him. But it wasn't really an animal, it was just Sasuke.

And now he was dying from the metaphoric wound. The minutes were dragging by and for a while he just considered digging the damn blade into his chest himself. But it was too late, since Sasuke leaned closer, doing the deed for him. Slowly but surely, Naruto's head leveled downward, seeming astonished by the measly cut.

Naruto hated how weak he was acting, at how hard it was keeping a shred of normalcy. And a part of him, however deep, wished that he could hate Sasuke for it. But he could not. Not ever. Naruto was only half listening to what the other was saying now; since he was too busy deciding whether he really like it when Sasuke furrowed his eyebrows like that, or if he just missed seeming him irritated.

''_**I'm**_** the coward, huh?**'' The tone he used was accusative, but he pushed no further. He just kept breathing deep, contemplating how long Sasuke would prolong this conversation. Because quite frankly, he didn't think he could take much of it. Every time Sasuke spoke, it was like a jarring hit. Every word circled in his head over and over before giving him a chance to respond.. as if secretly, his brain was looking for something.

His throat felt tight with pressure because he was holding back. But not from the anger. Or any odds at yelling. No, it was from fear. For the things that should have been said a long time ago, and all the apologies. He needed to stick to the plan though, and just let this be the end of things. It's what had been decided.

Everything else was frivolous. If anything, it caused more stress in his head, like a rehearsed line that should have been spoken at one of his long-winded speeches, back at Konoha. All these years of build up, and he was almost glad to resign with a fate such as this. He didn't want to hurt but then again, Sasuke's absence had been hurting him, even though it was unknown to most for years.

He could not lie to himself and say that he could ever forgive Sasuke for this. He could not lie to himself and say he was not repulsed by his own feelings or concerns. But they remained. He tilted his head back up, a sudden urge overwhelming his body to look at those eyes again.

_Can't he just be satisfied?_ He had always wished he could predict Sasuke's reactions. Sometimes, he pretended to know, but ended up short. The Uchiha was just too wild, too untamed, for him to ever pin a single word that came out of his mouth. To prove his point? He never would have guessed Sasuke would jump like that, and take out all of his clones at once. It appalled him, really, how easy he destroyed them. But still he remained in his place, like an obediant fool. The shallow wound on his chest created small streaks of red, little paths along his tan skin.

''**H...Hey!**'' Digging the soles of his shoes into the ground, Naruto shifted the few feet into Sasuke's chest, his back pressed firmly against the planes of the other. And instantly, he was tense. Because last time, he had a sword to his neck that had rendered him powerless to death. Now, he was just being held - quite painfully, he might add - by the wrists. He didn't struggle, despite this discomfort, meerly whined at the bruising skin. Even though he could have easily fought his way free, Naruto didn't find himself enough will to try. When the kunai was placed to his neck, he admits to stretching his head away from the object, cerulean orbs connecting with the sky in a timeless embrace.

''**Defeat?**'' that voice wasn't his. He felt like he was reading from the script of someone else's life. Disconnected and broken. With Sasuke's breath pressed against his neck, Naruto also admits to feeling entirely bewildered. What exactly was he doing?

''**.. Don't know why you care.**'' He cringed, feeling the grip tighten on his sore wrists, while being thrusted closer to Sasuke's chest. If that were even possible. He could feel every part of his captor, the pale skin making his own incredibly warm.

The sharp tool had moved, albeit he barely cared, and dug a tiny spot over his heart. Heh. How appropriate. He really wanted to reach out and touch him, but balled his hands into fists instead, still staring up at the sky. He felt ashamed. He felt stupid. But most of all he felt nothing but regret. He shouldn't have let himself get caught in a situation like this. He most certainly should not have been this comfortable with dying, either.

_He's been... planning this. For a long time._ He wanted to be embarassed at how pathetic he was. How easily he'd become loyal to a man who wanted nothing more than to destroy him. But it didn't. And Sasuke's admittance did nothing but destroy Naruto's fleeting heartbeat for a moment, before kicking it into a higher gear. No doubt that the raven could tell, being as close as he was.

''**..Your right.**'' After all those years, he couldn't remember the countless times he had ever admitted such a thing. His voice was shallow, careful. The small smile still played on his lips, but fell somewhat with Sasuke's thought.

''**He died a long time ago.**'' You could always count on Naruto to say something stupid. By tally, he was on a roll today. Silence cloaked the pair in an unbearable sense, making Naruto shift from foot to foot.

_But that kid died searching for you._

Just a little longer, and he'd be off in oblivion. Before tonight he could count how many times he had during the year on his hand that he'd actually felt _alive_ and now, here he was nearly s**t - faced with adrenaline. His eyes watered again, if only for a moment, before returning to their usual hue. He wanted to be strong, to prove to Sasuke that he wasn't a total wimp.

_God, I am such a__xx_ The moment the teeth sunk into his neck, Naruto found his mind wander into a haze of _this_. A place where white spotted his vision, and the surroundings swirled in one. A gutteral moan ruptured from his lips, followed by a suppressed 'ah!~' He didn't know what was happening, but he was freaking the hell out.

''**Sas...**'' The darker man's lips suckled on the mark, prying for a blush to coat his cheeks. Bursts of questions conjured themselves in his mind then, most of which were unnecessary and stupid.

The words that followed however, managed to strike a nerve. His eyes grew wide with panic, a variety of images dominating his vision. Horror, fire, and carnage.

Man, he should have known this would happen.

Sasuke would never be satisfied with him. Never had been.

''**No!**'' The word exploded from him. The shout gave him courage, however small it may be, and he immediatly started squirming. He could barely focus with Sasuke breathing on him like that, but he had to try. For goodness sakes, he threatened Konoha!

''**Don't... don't!**'' he took a shaky breath, practically vibrating.

''**I'll...**''

* * *

.

Sasuke: So…uh…you were saying something about not being able to find the beggining of the next chapter, right?

Me: Why do you feel the need to empty me out in front of our readers? -.-

Naruto: Yeah, Sasuke-teme, why?!!! Wait, whaaatt? You don't have the next chapter?!! Do you mean this??!!

Sasuke: Heh… dobe, you're too slow.

Naruto: Don't call me that, teme!

...

Hey! Also, I am not slow!

Sasuke: Heh...

Me: Hey, hey, guys! That's not even the point right now! God!

Naruto: What's the point?

Sasuke: Tche…idiot.

Naruto: Teme!

Me: Shut up, you two!

Okay, here's the deal, I don't know when I will update again and if the story is going to have an end, because apparently I am missing a file and if I don't find it then…there will be a big loop in the story and I wouldn't like that. So…

Naruto: So…let's go eat ramen!

Me: -.- Is this guy ever serious?

Sasuke: No.

Me: Yeah, my dear fans , you heard the deal. Sorry for any inconvenience. I will let you know if I will continue the story or not. Until next time!

Oh and... **R&R, please?**

Sasuke: Hypocrite…I am sure you did this on purpose because I talked back to you…Very low.

Me: I guess we'll never know, now, will we? ;)

-To my fans, I was serious. :3 ~


	6. Break Down

**Break Down**

Sasuke's POV

Hearing his accusing tone, Sasuke pushed softly but confidently the kunai lightly a bit deeper into Naruto's skin. It was easy to think of him as a coward when he was the one that had given up on Konoha and all, but of coruse Naruto was always too busy playing it a hero to ever understand how hurt deep down Sasuke was.

That all that was leading his steps deeper into the path of revenge was his irreversibly scarred and hurt soul.

Sasuke's furry only grew bigger with Naruto's admittance of his own defeat someway. So, it wasnt just his idea, the blonde had lost indeed a part of himself that made him who he was.  
Sasuke didnt know why but he felt an intense urge to quit any fight and come back only when Naruto would be himself again, to fight him on equal terms.

The man he was facing now was nothing more than en empty shell of the person he used to know.  
Even when he mentioned Konoha, the hokage didnt seem to struggle, not in the point Sasuke wanted him to.  
Sasuke sighed dissapointed, onyx eyes watering due to something as desperation creeping up on his tormented soul. The blonde was making it harder than any situation Sasuke once could hope to fear.

He expected a hating Naruto to face him off, to strike weapons with him, exchange powerful jutsu and genjutsu, harsh words, call him traitor, accuse him of things he did and he never cared for doing them.

Yet it felt as the hokage was holding back of something his chest was craving to let out, but Sasuke wasn't sure if he could deal hearing it, if it was anything else than accusations and harsh words, he didn't know if he could keep a straight face and a steady hand once the words would reach his ears.

Because all these weeks he had been preparing for an angry Naruto, even hoping that the blonde had started hating on him. But instead, he had come to found an already defeated resemblance of whom he thought he knew. What was he doing there again?

''You will what?...''he asked, his voice partially amused to Naruto's half effort to do something decent that day.

He wasn't amused, though, only trying hard to draw down his disappointment and bitterness.  
He let go of Naruto's wrists, giving him plenty of freedom to move around.

He let the kunai drop down to the ground in front of Naruto's left foot.  
But he still didnt move completely away, not because he planned to attack the blonde again or restrain him once more anytime soon but mostly cause he didn't want Naruto to look at him straight in the eyes when he'd say the words he was going to.

Leaning closer once more, momentarily shaking slightly once the bodies came in contact again, he burried lighty his face into Naruto's blonde hair to his sides and he took in his essence.

He didnt know why he liked smelling and touching the blonde so much. It was just an instant pleasure he had found out by chance and he didnt dare question more of it. In battle you often had to come in physical contact with your opponent and enemy, why couldn't this be considered normal out of battle too?

Either way, he was way too used to coming in such contact with his surroundings-even if most of it happened during battle-that his mind didn't read further into his actions, that deep down were something he could never bring himself to admit-unless he died from embarrassment or hurt pride first.

Unburying half of his face out of Naruto's hair, so as he could speak, Sasuke muttered huskily, his hands hanging freely to his sides, but not without being ready to defend their owner if something went wrong:

''So I am the coward when you are the one that refuses to fight for his and many other's life? Naruto, I don't expect you to look up at me, either, but I never thought I'd be as disappointed in you.' 'he said and it was the longest he had talked ever since the two men met at the top of the hills.

His own heart tightened while he spoke out those words. They weren't meant to hurt Naruto or even push him further into reacting. It was just his honest thoughts and people knew Sasuke didn't hold back at saying what he really thought of someone, no matter who they were.

Sasuke wasn't a coward, maybe at feelings he was because he always denied or ran away from love and care. But it wasn't like he was afraid of anyone in battle or out of it. He simply was far too selfish to care for people's feelings and so he always followed his way, indifferent and frozen to anyone he might leave behind or hurt with his mannerism.  
Feeling unexplainably hurt when Naruto asked why he cared, his mind drifted off to anything else he could say rather than answer this. He was too close for relief, too close to lie without the blonde guy picking up on his fastened hear beat, too close to not give in.

''I wish you could hate me...'' he whispered in such a low tone, surprised in himself that he had let out such words. It seemed that the meeting had affected him ina bigger scale than he was afraid of and now he had started losing slightly control of his own mouth.

This wasnt good. Not sure, whether Naruto had heard him or not, since he wasn't sure if he had heard it himself, either, being said in such a low absent minded tone, Sasuke pulled away from Naruto slowly but coldly.

He looked at the blonde's back, his heart racing in pain. He didn't know why he cared but he felt as he had lost his old friend, as if the real Naruto he knew had indeed died, as if that person standing in front of him wasn't the orange haired idiot he had come to care for once in the past.

But now, no, he didn't know why he cared whether Naruto had remained the person he had liked or not. And this was hurting him even more. He thought he had cut off their bonds once and for all when he had taken that road leading out of Konoha and to his revenge path.  
Could he have lived in an illusion long ago? Could he have mistaken so badly when he questioned his cold heart. Could his feelings still exist in him, but just sleeping, hidden from his strict logic?

His frustration growing bigger, he pinched the arch of his nose-an old habit of his that Naruto was familiar with- and looked down, his eyes two unreadable black pools.  
He didn't know if Naruto had turned to face him anymore or not, he was busy enough with his inner struggle so on purpose he chose not to focus on the dobe's figure or movements right now.

He didn't really know if he was afraid to die. And he wouldn't mind if somehow the dobe killed him and put him out of the difficult position the raven haired guy was in-to kill the hokage in order to fulfil his revenge.

''...because I hate you.'' Sasuke said, as if resuming the phrase he had let out s absent mindly a little while ago.  
This time he had said it louder, on purpose, urged by his own inner battle.

_Because I care for __**you**__..._

His cheeks were slightly colored with red, in that torturing to him thought.  
Otherwise, his face had remained emotionless, still not daring to focus back on Naruto.  
How could he get out of this? Things had taken so much the wrong way that he was starting to fear he wasnt going to end what he had come there for. What he had started.  
And then an idea passed from his head: he knew what would motivate Naruto enough.  
Sasuke ever the calculative one knew how to dig into people's feelings and take advantage of them when he needed to-not that he couldn't care less for them otherwise.

If Naruto didn't feel like fighting Sasuke, the raven haired ninja knew that he couldn't let him walk away just like that, either.

''If Naruto Uzumaki is already dead, then my job here is done...''he said after long moments of pregnant silence.

His voice had sounded sure and definite, even if he had no idea how he could pull this out successfully.  
He only had to hope he had measured Naruto's personality and feelings well so far.

Knowing Naruto, he would try his best to keep him to Konoha, as he always tried to do that period that he was chasing him after to bring him back.  
It would be a big pain to the blonde if he let the raven leave now, now that he was technically inside the place he wanted him to be in.

After all these years of failed chasing, he finally had his target is sight and he was about to lose him again. That was something Naruto would have to fight for, if not for himself, if not for his own village.

Sasuke turned around silent and started walking away slowly, not bothering where his steps really lead him to, secretly hoping for a defiant reaction, an act of Naruto to stop him.

He hoped that with this the blonde hokage ninja would come to realize that his only way to keep Sasuke there was to fight him.  
And even though this would make it easier for him, he somehow sensed that it would also make it harder for Naruto in the same time.

But being the careless b*****d he always was, he brushed it off as something meaningless.

Naruto's POV

Destroy me, he thinks. At the moment he wouldn't mind too much. Because his veins are screaming screaming _screaming_. It's a harsh nag that floats from their throats, urging him; ''it's all a mistake. Fix this!'' But then the noise will become more persistent, and a lot louder, a sound that grounds so harshly against his eardrums that a sharp ring resounded. It blinds him to the agony that followed. The depth of the kunai did not phase him, nor the fact that poison could flow into his bloodstream at any second bother him. All he could concentrate on was the sky, and how endless it seemed. Sasuke murmured things. Diluted his attention. But it never strayed.

Was Sasuke going to remind him every second that this was his fault? That he'd given in to so many things. Ruined a chance at saving him. But it was through pure loyalty. He hadn't purposely chose to think Oh, I'm going to ruin my life and throw it all away for _him_. No. Sasuke had been clueless all of these years, so who knew when he'd finally get it.

''**I'll... have you hunted.**'' Naruto wasn't going to let himself get worked up like Sasuke was but he still felt an agonizing amount of frustration building. Sasuke had it easy. Ever since that first day, everything had come naturally. Girls, jutsu, missions. Naruto was still daydreaming about s**t he couldn't accomplish. He wanted to bring Sasuke home and wake up with him there every morning and share ramen with him at 2 am and fuss over him when he was sick. It was what best friends did. What they were suppose to do. But he couldn't. That was someone else's job. Besides, didn't Sasuke realize how humiliating this was? ''**I - i... will, Teme!**'' Naruto jerked when his wrists were suddenly set loose, immediately rubbing one hand over the reddened skin as he turned to look at his counterpart. It struck him for a moment, how much nostalgia Sasuke brought on. Especially of the old days.

He recalled when they use to argue over silly things, and train for hours on end. They each had strived toward equal goals, and were unmatched by others. He found that not much had changed since then, except now, Sasuke didn't want to have equal goals. He wanted to declare how much better he was than Naruto. Not that it'd been a secret in the first place, but still.

Ting - ting.

The kunai dropped between them, clattering on the rocky floor just as the mask had earlier. It was in such a manner that reflected a dejected and uncertain way that left the blond totally speechless. He noticed how the weapon was within reach, just short of his left foot. However, he made no move to grab it. No, no. He was mister i-accept-death remember?

''**Sas...ke.**'' Acknowledging the male's movement, Naruto blinked as he seemed to tremble at the contact with his body. Had he been shaking earlier? Naruto couldn't recall. It was strange really, to be on the recieving end of such a caring notion. God Sasuke, he thinks in his head. What are you doing? He sucks in a breath and bites on his cheek.

He's so close.. It's almost painful. Naruto stiffens but can't resist raising a hand to Sasuke's figure, an arm wrapping around his neck, tugging him closer. He doesn't know what's going on, but it feels so _right_, and Naruto doesn't ever want the Uchiha to move away. Their bodies mold together for several minutes, a single moment of union that leaves Naruto questioning reality.

His hand begins to slack when he feels Sasuke shift away, the throaty voice sending shivers up his spine. A frown crawled it's way across those lips of his, ready for what was coming. His arm retracted as soon as he had finished, lowering to his pocket. He wanted to punch Sasuke. But couldn't. He wanted to shout at him. But wouldn't.

Naruto simply stood there, cursing his idiocracy for giving in to this a second time. Those words held no room for doubt, it was all truth. A fact. They were cold and fresh and left invisible wounds upon his mangled heart. And in the end, he can't help it. He trembles, twirling away from the other.

The point of those words had been to hurt him. Well surprise. It worked. The Hokage blinked several times, the wind whistling more brutally as time wore on. How was he suppose to respond to that anyway? He sniffs, letting his head drop. He wants to go home. Get as far away from these words as possible.

The last rags of his dignity are slowly disintegrating. _''I wish you could hate me...'' _

That makes two of us, bud. But he's lost all sense of pride, and stares shamefully at his feet. Arguments were once his specialty. Being Hokage, he was happy to admit such a fact. And if it wasn't for this dark cloud hanging over his head, he'd still be a normal person. Being here.. dealing with this, it was wrong. And if there was one thing he strived for, it was perfection.

This most certainly wasn't helping. The sooner this ended, the better. The logical side of him was striking out, trying to follow the flow of those words like he didn't care. Sasuke hadn't attacked him physically, so from this ideal, he almost debates hoping again.

_''...cause I hate you.''_

And all at once, his heart shatters.

The pain from that sentence creeps up on him like a fog. He hopes that when it lifts, he's not going to be broken into tiny pieces on the ground. Sasuke's words have left him even more defeated than before, his shoulders slumped, the hair on his neck standing on edge. The last five minutes are on playback in his mind, mocking him with darker tones than the Uchiha had conjured.

''**Of course you do.**'' he whispers finally. It's unintelligible to most, and Naruto doubts he'd heard. His chest is on fire from the hurt, and his head is spinning real bad. However confused he was, the message is still clear. He'd just been a toy. Falling into line whenever Sasuke felt like playing. For so many years! Except Sasuke was grown up. Ready to get rid of him.

Naruto sighed as the assassin pried away, albeit he didn't make a move to stop him. The silence that followed was unbearable. They stood there, totally frozen. Naruto was starting to let the words sink in to his flesh, creating a visible tarnish upon his expression.

And for a while, nothing makes sense.

When Sasuke says his job is done, he hasn't the slightest clue. He's still standing there, letting his friend get away. When it finally hits him, the blond is almost in shock. His eyes grow wide and his body turns around on instinct, kicking up a bit of dust.

_I'll never see him again._ The thought scares him, but what's more... something inside of him reaches inside and _burns_, digging for anger.

He can feel all his muscles uncurl as he rushes forward, the swell of his breath coming in slow and steady because in his head, this is the answer they need. The one that _Sasuke_ wants.

''**b*****d!**''

He flings himself onto the other's back, using the brunt force of his weight to topple them over, and twist Sasuke over to face him. A growl makes it's way past his lips, unsteady and brash. It doesn't matter what he says anymore. He doesn't think the other would even care what he had to share. This was all so pointless.

But he realizes he can't concentrate on his newfound fury and think at the same time. So, while taking pleasure in the fact he was now restraining his opposer, he let loose his hardest glare, and snapped out

''**Is this what you want?**''

He feels like a nervous teenager again. And he loathes that feeling. If anything, he wants it to go away. Because if Sasuke wants to ******** with his head like this then leave again, he's got another thing coming. It isn't until he sees Sasuke's face, that blank, heartless expression that drives him wild, that he feels something inside him foster the fire. It'll all be better soon, it whispers. Just fight him. Rip him up a bit, for all the pain he's caused you. Or, a lot worse.

''**You want me to hate you?**'' He says.

His eyes roam downward to where the mark would be on the Uchiha's neck, and the words repeat themselves in his head. No going back, the monster inside him urges. Just hurt him. He can't make himself say everything's okay anymore. That he can patch up another mess or imperfection. Things are permanently damaged here, leaving each the frayed ends of string. ''**Don't ask me twice.**'' The tone lowers, into a sound that's almost beast - like. Every second of this is tearing at Naruto's soul, battering with his sanity. Sasuke doesn't look pleased, but it's through proper weight displacement that he manages to keep the other pinned down. Legs locked over others, hands grasped wrists, and Naruto sneered.

''**Make sure this is what you ******** want!**'' he snarls.

There were at least a hundred choices he could make in this situation; the worst ones being following this path or flat out running away. But he knew either one would make Sasuke happy, content.. especially with the idea of hunting him down. That is, unless, he magically starts caring about him. Naruto's pretty sure that won't ever happen, but he's too tired to even care anymore. He just wants this to be over. With or without him living through it.

That burning dig has started to spread, and is slowly numbing out his chest, quickening his heartbeat as the male gets even closer. He couldn't help admiring Sasuke the closer he gets, a knee - jerk reaction he passes off as another tie to the past. He was becoming more upset as time went on, thinking about how much time he had wasted holding out for Sasuke. Because everything, was always about friggin' Sasuke.

''**I'll **_**never**_** forgive you!**'' the words are cold.

This doesn't phase him. All other emotions are shoved outside his head, giving him the ability to do the one thing Sasuke wants from him - to fight. This was bordering on nightmare for him, but he kept quiet. It helped when that voice whispered more words of reassurance to him, coaxing that Sasuke had it coming.. and that he deserved everything he might get.

''**Say it!**'' Sasuke just had to unlock this madness, Naruto resigned. And then all hell would break loose.

''**What're you waiting for?!**''

* * *

**R&R? **

Come on people, I know you are reading this! So, please, leave a comment!

Naruto: You heard her, dattebayo!

Sakura: *bonks Naruto on the head*

Naruto: Hey! This story is about me and the teme! Where did Sakura come from?

Me: Meh, I decided to bring her in the AUs, since she is the only one that can silence you effectively.

Sakura: Got any problem with that, Narutoo?

Naruto:* looks at her terrified* O-of course, not, Sakura-chan!

Naruto: *whispers* ''Sasuke, save me!''

Sasuke: Sakura, you are weak.

Sakura: *runs away crying*

Naruto: Sasuke, you're awesome, man!

Sasuke: *smirks* Heh, it's all it ever takes for me.

Me: *glares at Sasuke* W.t.f, you hurt her , you idiot! And you Naruto, aren't you supposed to have a crush on her?

Naruto: Not in this story! *sticks tongue out to me*

Sasuke:_ I_ hurt her? You're the one who's writing me.

Me: But you hurt her in the show too! Hypocrite!

Sasuke: Well, …blame it on Kishi. *shrugs*

Me: Whatever.

Naruto: Cheer up, you two. We got out next chapter. :D

Sasuke: I knew it…

Me: What are you talking about?

Sasuke: I knew that it was all a trick to make me feel threatened. You did find the chaps, afterall.

Me: No, I had really los…Hey! I am not supposed to be explaining myself to you! I have other things to do right now!

Sasuke: Like?

Naruto: Rasengan!!!

Sasuke:…

Me:…

Naruto: What?

Me: Nevermind. -.-

Well, like getting ready for a party…

Sasuke: Since when did you start being social?

Me: Since we need to cut it shortly cause our chit chat threatens to become longer than the actual chapter!

Naruto: Don't you find it funny how Sasuke-teme talks more than me in the AUs. I do!

Sasuke: Shud up, dobe.

Until Next Time!


	7. Bittersweet

**Bittersweet **

Sasuke's POV

Even if Sasuke could easily dodge him off, he let the blonde get it out. He felt like laughing out loud when the blonde said he could have him hunted. For one, he knew his best anbus didnt stand a chance against him, for two, he knew Naruto would never do such a thing. He was all words.

He didnt like messing with the boy's heart, actually he didnt care until this very outburst.

He had to admit he hadnt seen it coming, not in such a violent reaction.  
But in the very end, he was right, his leave was the only thing that could shock the hokage deep down.  
And his last words, about hating him seemed to have a dramatic effect on the young man.

As the blonde pulled the raven haired man down, Sasuke clenched his teeth in the pressure but his face remained emotionless as he was pushed around to lock eyes with an enraged hokage.  
His onyx orbs boring into the cerulean ones, trying to study the aftermath his own cruel words had created to his past friend. And for one instance, seeing that crazy sadness, desperation, insanity into the hokage's eyes, he felt regret.

Not letting show, trying to keep his cool, he shifted lightly under the boy's weight. He still could push him off of him anytime he wanted but for the time being he felt like he wanted to let the blonde get it all out before they moved on with the fight.

His wrists pinned down against the ground by Naruto's hands, he couldnt help but shiver lightly in the memory of Naruto embracing his neck some moments ago.  
It felt so right, but allas he had to ruin the moment, being the typical jerk he was.  
But now, he had no excuse to ruin the moment, he was the captured one and it was a sweet surrender.

His skin warming up lightly under Naruto's touch, he looked up at the guy who muttered meaningless insults to him. He seemed to have lost his self control and Sasuke didnt enjoy this anymore.

But wasnt that what he wanted? He looked into the cerulean orbs, silent, emotionless, but with a strong intensity as if he was trying to find the solution to all their problems into his eyes.

But Naruto seemed even more lost than him. Why had they become like that again? Was it really his fault? Or was it Naruto's for never trying to understand him? He thought he loved him but he never realized how meanignless all of the attention Sasuke got was to him.

'**'No, this is not what I want...You know what I want: your life.**'' he repeats but his eyes are empty, he says it almost mechanically, as some well programmed robot that has no sense of what its saying but it is saying it, either way. And his words sound so empty, like they are words he says for joke, everyday, casual, oddly familiar.

He knows the effect this will have on Naruto's already shattered heart yet he doesn't care, he is on a leash, probably losing self control himself.

His mean words are just a pathetic effort to cover up his feelings, his sadness, his worry for seeing Naruto so heart broken and knowing it is all his fault. But why does he care? Why did he come there for his head if he cared in the first place? All this confusion served to nothing.

''**I don't deserve your forgiveness.**''he whispers, almost too scared anymore to speak out any words, seeing Naruto's mental condition so frail. But it isnt like him to be nice for long.

He wishes he could snatch out those wrists of his from Naruto's grip and reach his hands up to the blonde's face and wipe his forecoming tears away. Just touch him, just tell him he cares for him in his own way, a way that his lips cant find. It feels funny how eager his body is to trasmit what he feels, but his mouth isn't. Almost as if talking about feelings is forbid to him.

If he saw Naruto crying, he is afraid he couldn't handle his own emotions anymore. Naruto seems angry but he knows better than that. He knows how hurt the blonde feels, its so easy to read, right into his watery cerulean orbs.

And there is his chance...Could he hope for an easy but sly get away? Could he do what Naruto dared him to and provoke his own death? In order to save Naruto? Yes he could. Yes there was nothing else in this world he would want more right now than exhange his life for the hokages.

It wasnt his plan, its not what his mind tells him to do, but this is Naruto and he is just a human after all. He doesnt hate Naruto the way he hated Itachi. He would do once everything and defy anyone to claim Itachi's life. Cause Itachi was the cause of all his pain , of all his cut bonds, or thats what he thought before he found out the truth at least.

But with Naruto, it was different. The blonde guy had never done anything bad to him other than stay loyal and devoted to his memory all these years of his crime filled absence.  
After Itachi's death, Sasuke had been having such thoughts all the time, which bothered and tortured him a lot while he took his decision to revenge Konoha using his childhood friend.

And if now he was to go back and ask Naruto to forgive him, it would be the easy way out. He knew Naruto would take him back with open arms, anytime, and he knew that he would make everyone else do the same.  
But what had Sasuke done for him all his life? Nothing. And this word stung in his head a lot more than he wanted it to.

He had come to kill the hokage, but it seemed as if he was holding back in the last minute. He had struggled and agonized a lot to make Naruto defiant, in battle mode, yet now that he had him where exactly he wanted him to, he couldnt find it in him to hurt him anymore.

Not when his voice was giving out such monstrous pain.  
He could knock Naruto out very easily, instantly, by activating his sharingan. The blonde would only have to look into his crimson eyes-the way he looked at his black right now-and he would fall asleep in his lap, hypnotized as if nothing had happened.

But then, the fight would continue. And no matter who won at the end, Naruto wasnt Itachi and Sasuke wasnt heartless...  
No matter how hard he tried to convince himself he was...he knew he wasnt, he knew his bonds werent cut over for eternity, the moment he locked eyes with Naruto on that very day.

His upset was becoming bigger each passing by torturing minute, notbreaking eye contact with the hokage.

He only waited for one word of his and the fight would be on. At last.  
But he couldnt find it in him, he couldnt bring himself to prolone Naruto's suffering more...and his. Maybe it was just a moment of weakness he would regret later on. Oh, how he wished he was away now, alone, and not under that intense light blue gaze that haunted his conscience.

His hands were shaking lightly, as his fingers interlocked with Naruto's long ones. Gripping tightly on his past teammate's hands, as if he was trying to take strength from him, he looked deeply into his eyes, trying not to give his strong unbearable emotions out.

His lips parted partially, as he was trying hard to bring himself to say something insulting, something mean, something rude, to initiate the fight.

It came so easy to him on other occasions, he would let out condescending insults and words as if it was water flowing out of his mouth, as if it was second nature to him to despise the blonde.

Yet, this very time, it was upsettingly hard. Just a word, just a mean phrase, and Naruto would unleash all his fury on him and Sasuke would know he did the right thing.

Cause his coscience was telling him that between fighting on equal terms with Naruto with death of either as a result and going back to him while he knew the blonde would forgive him instantly no matter what he said, the first was a more fair thing to do. A tough but more honest one. And he owed some honesty to Naruto, after all these years of ignorance and rejection.

Maybe it was mean, but it was the right thing to do, long term. He himself couldnt feel fine with settling down in Konoha again after everything that he had done. He wasnt of steel, he couldnt bear the thought of himself in that place when he knew he was considered a criminal and someone who didnt deserve the hokage's mercy and forgiveness.

He was still contemplating in his mind about what to say, when the words came out on their own, not even himself realizing what he was saying.

'**'What I am waiting for? What are **_**you**_**, idiot, waiting for? All this damn time, I have only betrayed you and left you behind, I have only hurt you! Why haven't you killed me already? What kind of a dobe you are that you let me do this to you? You say you dont forgive me? Prove it! I am here, waiting for you to hurt me, so do it! I deserve all of your hatred!**''

His voice came out in a loud tone, but it didnt sound steady anymore. It was shaky, still deep, but he sounded like he was having an outburst, too. Which he was, sadly for him, he had his weak moments too and this was surely one of them.  
Damn the dobe and how hard he was making all of it.

His cheeks had taken a light blush color, because even if his words hadnt let out too much feeling-or thats what he thought-they were meant out of care and interest.  
But he could count on Naruto to never believe that, used to his mean nature all those years.  
But...he wasnt sure if his eyes were as collected as he thought his words had been...  
He could feel his hands shaking now intensely, locking fingers with Naruto's in a desperate motion, he knew that for sure.

He also knew his heart was racing so fast that he could feel it losing a a beat anytime soon. His heart beat, oh his heart beat was so loud, he could hear it among Naruto's upset breaths and his own heavy ones.  
Could the dobe hear it,as he did?  
His face, his face was still emotionless, he got that, and he felt grateful...but dont they say eyes are the mirror into one's soul?

Well, his eyes were perfectly dark, he got nothing to afraid, his eyes couldnt betray him...

But this thought immediately proved itself wrong, the moment Sasuke registered a salty liquid crawling slowly along his pale, cheeks.

His perfectly emotionless cold facade had just been ripped off by his own tears...

He was crying.

And the very immediate moments that follows, his mind could only register the most embarrassing pregnant silence he had ever experienced.

Naruto's POV

He wanted to hit him in the face. He wanted to kill him. He wanted to drag him back to Konaha, and keep him safe. But Naruto would never find it in himself to actually make it happen. Like so many things, Naruto could never do much more than want. There was no emotion in Sasuke's face. Just this.. look. Like he knew he'd won. A type of superiorority complex that made Naruto growl in agony.

Was he really so terrible? Was there really so much reason to hate him? They'd barely seen each other in years! Blue eyes smudged against black, trying to stay calm. Fierce. The things Sasuke said were sharp, and could go deeper than any kunai. He knows that this is only the truth again, that Sasuke has always hated him.. but hearing it all the same hurts.

He bristles, trying not to seem as worse-for-wear as he feels. It's so familiar to see Sasuke speak like this, to hear that tone. It's almost like reliving the past. Those eyes drag him back into simpler times, to seperate occasions when all he'd thought to do was simply stop and stare.. like it might be his last chance. Little did he know at the time, it had been. Naruto isn't ready for this confruntation. That's easy to catch. But he keeps his head held high, trying to maintain this false dominance.

''**You can ******** have it.**'' he says. His eyes are a facade of ignorance, of a hope he no longer has. ''**If you really want it, just take my life already! But you can't have anything else.**'' He's negotiating. How pathetic. Trying to make sure Konoha stays safe. It's part of his persona though, putting someone or something else before himself. Safety had no means in regard to his life. It was worthless.

He blinked at the sound of Sasuke's next words, almost stunned. He didn't think he deserved his forgivness? Damn straight, a part of him wanted to scream out. You'll never deserve anything I give you. But the better part, the part that held his coddling heart, knew better. ''**No, you don't.**'' A lie. He tried to convince himself of the words as soon as they left him, but it didn't work. No matter what happened, he knew he'd always care about Sasuke. He'd always go running after him, long after the trail went cold. It was just how things worked. Sasuke would push him away, or cut him to pieces, but the blond would always come back. Like a kicked dog to it's master. He couldn't bare life without Sasuke, nothing even mattered.

The last couple months had blurred together in a mass of hysteria. Being Hokage was never an easy job, but without someone to fall back on.. he'd been torn apart. Just seeing the Uchiha like this, it patched him up. And unfortunatly, destroyed him at the same time. ''**You'll never deserve anything I give you.**''

Something rabid bubbled in his stomach. Anger and nervousness and hurt were fermenting violently inside of him. He felt Sasuke's fingers twine with his and he slowly, _slowly_ averted his eyes. Naruto didn't understand, which was insanely obvious. He never seemed to understand anything, did he?

Naruto huffed, his cheeks blowing out stubbornly as he cursed. He could feel Sasuke shaking again, and that scared him. Like it or not, the well being of his traitorous friend was important to him. He conjured up as many reasons as he could for the trembling, most of which made him cringe.

Tan fingers reciprocated the grip, digging into the ground beneath Sasuke's hand as he looked back at him. Bitterness would be the proper response to anything right now, but he blocked it out.

Blue eyes slipped down to the other's lips when they parted, unable to keep from pursing his own in anticipation. Whatever was coming next could very well end one of their lives. And only Sasuke held the key to this floodgate. He waited, and waited. But as the sun beat downward and they fell into another agonizing silence, he began to figure out that he wouldn't say anything. And because of this, he growled yet again.

_What's wrong with me?_ He felt like an animal. And somewhere deep inside, he liked it. To be honest, he hadn't felt like this in some time.. not sincecc

''**At least we're being honest now.**'' he gripped, head dipping closer to the Uchihas.

''**I get that I meant so little to you, and..**'' he stopped. Air caught in his throat, refusing to let him complete that segment. Sasuke didn't need to know. He was a ruthless killer, Naruto remembered. He prided himself in being such. Why would he ever care for some ex-teammate?

He was getting nowhere with this anger. He pretended to be strong, to be ready to hurt him. The fox was getting excited, a devilish grin encompassing it's features that he could feel in the depths of his heart. Or what was left of it, that is. Naruto's eyes leveled against slate black, a million words perched upon his lips. He didn't want to be affected by those eyes anymore, or by Sasuke in general.

But the thought of forgetting him left him filled with such horror, a churning bile that made his mouth taste like ash. And had he not been so accustomed to staring at that empty gaze, he might have missed the significance that followed. He may have missed the pain, that coarsed through those irises.

It was like an unraveling of sorts, a secret window he'd never seen through before. And Naruto's captivated by it, ignoring the whispers of it being a trick. That it was just a means of getting the better of him. Again.

''**Have you ever cared about anyone other than yourself?**'' His voice broke, hitching at the very end. He didn't know why he asked, but he did. Maybe for peace at mind. Maybe to stall a little longer. He knew he could be overpowered any minute, and shifted anxiously as he tried to keep control.

Sasuke was a formiddable figure. Compared to how young they were when they last saw each other, Naruto quickly noticed from their range how much older he looked. How his face held no child-like roundness, or how his hair was much longer. Darker, too. If he remembered right.

How it became such a way frightened him, but he stopped himself before the question came outright. He was already getting a high tally of stupid questions in today. Could he really afford to ask about _hair_? He felt Sasuke's fingers tighten, and reciprocated the feeling. He knew Sasuke must pity him. Naruto was the poor idiot who couldn't get over a childhood friend. But he didn't care. If anything, it made Sasuke more important to him.

Call it his own path of destruction.

''**I don't know!**'' he barked. The start of Sasuke's speech had sparked something in him. What was he waiting for? What was he holding onto? God. If only he knew.

''**You don't think I want to?**'' Naruto asked. He slumped a bit, grip tightening on those fingers. If Sasuke needed a hand to hold, well, so did he.

''**I've been trying to for years.**'' To find him. To catch him. To hurt him. To bring him back. He wanted to do all these things. He wanted to make everything right. If you mess something up, it's up to you to fix it. That's what Jeriya had said. And naturally, he took all the blame for not saving Sasuke. He made a face, trying not to let his emotions come slithering back. Fire had built inside of him, and was ready to explode. Why weren't they fighting yet? Oh yeah, Naruto was an idiot.

''_**I wish I'd never met you!**_''

He didn't mean to. He didn't mean it. He's sorry, Sasuke. He's so sorry. The blond remains quiet as he watches the silence encompass them. As time drifts forward, and suddenly.. Sasuke looks broken. It's hard, knowing his best friend is crying. There's so much he wants to do in that moment, that he opts to do the least likely.

He rolls over.

Landing on his back, Naruto coughs from the bland sting coming from the cuts on his chest. His left hand is still locked with Sasuke's; something he hasn't bothered to disconnect from the move. Surrounded by empty space, he thinks to himself, can it be? Could he really have been wrong about Sasuke all these years? Even this idea rubs him the wrong way. The blond frowns, tilting his head to look at the raven. He's always wanted to know what he kept hidden.

Well, here it is. It makes Naruto feel like scum, knowing that he should have picked up all this without waiting for Sasuke to finally crack; especially with that damn voice chanting at him. Take advantage of the situation, it repeats. Abuse him like he's abused everyone else.

''**I can't.**'' he admits. It's a slow - winded drawl, and Naruto clenches his eyes shut to breathe deep.

He never realized it until now, but he's finally got what he wanted. A chance to be with Sasuke. The boy who plagued his dreams. He'd threatened to throw away everything for years for him... and look. Sasuke hated him. The fact alone had him trembling, ready to break down. The word was stuck in his head, cursing him with it's presence. And when you haven't slept much for days, everything can seem a lot more drastic.

''**I can't hate you, okay?**'' His anger is deflating. He untangled his fingers, using the palm to cover his eyes. ''**I wish I could. But I can't.**'' He's not picky about how this ends. How anything ends. All he wants is for Sasuke to stay. But that'll never happen. And he can't keeping wanting like this.

''**I'm sorry,**'' He reaches out his hand to try and touch Sasuke, to help him through this, but stops halfway there. He hates you, remember? Naruto retracts the limb, coiling in on himself.

''**This has to finish. People are going to come looking for me. And... and you'll be...**''

Killed? No. Not likely. Sasuke was strong. Stronger than him. Than anyone. He wants to help though. As much as it hurts, Naruto can't let go. He'll save Sasuke by any means necessary, even if it means hurting his own people.

So, for the first time, Naruto rises upward alone, his back straight and heart heavy. Intent on letting Sasuke make his own decission. He's not going to bargain anymore. He's not going to beg.

''**Do what you came to do, Sasuke.**'' He turned around, looking at him curiously. This makes him act normal. Being within reaching distance of the other, knowing he's still real. Not just a genjutsu or sick joke.

''**I can't let you leave me again.**''

R&R

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	8. Stay

Sasuke's POV

His tears fall like burning bliss and curse in the same time on his pale tired skin.  
Was it his thought or had Naruto just said the meanest things the blonde could really patch for his rival? He always remembered how Naruto would offend, insult, or tease him but nothing sounded so serious and so real in the same time.

The thought alone made him cringe. He felt his tears wetting his neck, he felt Naruto's fingers gripping his own in response, as if Naruto was looking for something to hold on to, and somehow this made him feel less lonely in this. Less exposed.

The question had found the raven haired out of guard, even if he should expect it, being known as a careless ice berg around.  
Do you ever care for anyone besides yourself?

Yes, he does. He doesn't have many answers with him, he only came with a blade and his killing ambition, but other than that, nothing.  
And perhaps that was his biggest mistake. Being there without feeling ready to actually face his past friend off.

For a minute he hated himself, the minute Naruto rolled over, his hand still in his. He felt like an idiot, as if Naruto had seen inside his heart and decided to pay him back for all the pain but rejecting him with his turn.  
And in that moment, he couldn't help the violent shaking of his chest at the thought of being caught a fool in his own game.

_I wish I'd never met you. _

The words repeat themselves in his head, sending shivers down his spines.  
What is worst, he knows he deserves all this. And yet somehow, he also knows that Naruto has already regretted saying them.  
And then comes the admittance, he so surely but bitterly expected.

I can't hate you.

Sasuke turns to look at Naruto, regret and pain in his bright cerulean eyes.  
The blonde seemed as if he had been trying to reach for the raven, but he hold back himself on the last minute.  
Sasuke notices this and his eyes for a moment become slightly wilder.  
Oh how he wanted to feel his skin again on his. It was as if his whole body was in pain and wherver the blonde made contact with him, he felt the pain going away momentarily.

He shifts his look at his hand, Naruto's hand isnt there anymore...Can he do anything to get it back?  
But what is he thinking? Has he given up already?

His thoughts are cut abruptly when he hears Naruto's apology.  
Is he really apologizing to him when he is the one that should kneel in front of the blonde haired man and ask for his forgiveness? Now his eyes become two black wide pools looking at the cerulean one's in disbelief. He looks at him as if he is crazy.

And his thoughts become more confused, his chest struggles more with un even breaths, his heart races even faster with emotion, when he hears the next to come words out of the hokage's mouth.  
He is warning him? What is this? He came here for his life and the dobe is still trying to save him? Protect him?  
Oh, Naruto, always foolish like that. Always, devoted to me. But I think this is what drags me to you.

The thought is too much to bear, the blonde is making it very hard for Sasuke to finish what he came for.

How can he just accept to kill him, or even fight him after everything he had told him? If he was sure he could do it before, now he isnt.

Watching the guy standing up silent, he realizes that more tears are now decorating his pale complex. He watches for some instances his past friend, wondering why it is so hard to control his feelings. It wasnt like the guy in front of him wasnt anyone, either.

It was Naruto, his friend.

He stands up slowly, imitating the hokage. Now it is his turn to say some things Naruto wouldnt expect.  
And even if his logic is screaming at him and bashing him, it is too late anymore to restrict that emotional explosion that has spit up inside his chest and is blurring his judgement.

His eyes never leaving Naruto's, he walks slowly close to him, till he has closed any hostile distance that was keeping him away from the person his heart and mind were aching for.

He knows he cant let him keep him there, but he also knows that he cant kill the blonde idiot anymore.  
And he has to patch it up all in one phrase, that is coming out of the depths of his heart, those frozen depths no one could ever imagine they could nest such warm emotions.

Chest touching with chest, Sasuke leans his head closer to the blonde locks, placing his chin on Naruto's left shoulder, almost as if he is searching for comfort.

His hot breath is now haunting the blonde's neck, his chest is racing intensely against his, he wants to wrap his arms around him and close his eyes, but that'd be too much. And Naruto had every reason to push him away.

His mind is screaming, trying to prevent his lips of forming the words to come, but Sasuke doesnt care anymore. All he cares for is to let it out, for once. If he was to die today, or if Naruto was to become a memory and only, he wanted to have the chance to tell him how he felt for him.

He never got the chance to say what he felt to his family, to Itachi, to all his dear people that had died now and left him alone in a miserable world where no one understood him.  
All but one...Naruto, who was still a dear person to him, as he was back then at the forest of death or even more. He was something more than dear...

He nests his face on Naruto's side, burrying it half way on his soft hair, his chin never parting from the dobe's trembling shoulder.

He wants to get it out, but he cant. His lips part partially, more tears fall, his headache becomes bigger and he knows he has to get it out but it is hard. He raises one hand and grips on Naruto's shirt tightly, wishing the blonde could get with actions what he has trouble saying with words.

He grips on the tissue harder, the harder he tries to restrain his remaining tears back.  
He leans his head closer as in surrender to his feelings motion, and his lips land on the blonde's earlobe, but not on purpose.

'**'Damn you, Naruto. There is one person I still care for: You. And I hate you for this. I cant help it but...I care for you...**''he repeats the last words as if a broken tape, his mind has given up on him and his heart has taken over anymore.

He feels a lot better now that he let it out, but he still feels weak, he still needs Naruto...who knows for how far longer ?

He hates how he cant just feel nothing for the dobe, he hates himself cause after everything he has been through he still insists on letting himself form ties with people...If he ever lost Naruto after that, and even before that, he knew he would suffer again.

And even if Naruto didnt do it on purpose, he felt threatened from the dobe, out of the strong emotional power he held over him.

He is shaking now lightly, and a last effort to suppress himself only makes it worse. His hand gripping on the blonde's shirt, becomes an open palm that strokes softly the area for a while, and then becomes a fist again, closing the tissue inside his fingers, as he burries his face into Naruto's neck.

His tears become one with Naruto's skin. He can feel the salty liquid rolling down between the blonde's neck and his lips that are attached to it.  
He can feel his chest going up and down, heavily, as if trying to measure his violent emotions down.  
_  
__Naruto,... please,... dont leave me._

Naruto's POV

The silence stretched on.

And yet, that didn't bother him. Not so much as the fact that he could hear Sasuke sniffling. Or, that he didn't know what he could do to fix it. To the boy, it was worse than being stabbed with a poisoned kunai. Because at least then, he would have been able to label a decent reason for the pain.

But with Sasuke... he couldn't. Everything was just too messed up. The blond groaned, trying to keep himself from running straight into those arms. He didn't want to have the Uchiha upset. In fact, he'd give anything to make it stop. To take it back in on himself.

Cus' like it or not, Naruto was at fault for this. For everything.

''**I'm sorry,**'' he repeats again. The words are quiet, defeated. Sasuke was his life and everything else came in second. And with each tear, every bit of his exposed heart was tearing at the seams. What can he do? How can he help? He's not strong enough to handle it and he's most certainly not up for it to go on much longer. Blue eyes lock with black again, drowning in the sorrow he saw there. Naruto attempted to read the expression on Sasuke's face; it failed and succeeded at the same time. The person standing in front of him looked like he had just been run over and then stabbed several times. This wasn't what Naruto wanted. Of course he didn't.

The last thing he ever wanted to do was make Sasuke as miserable as him. Naruto knew what he had to do. Because standing here, not even attempting to frown for the sake of acting, was a pile of shattered glass and Naruto was the one who pitched the ball. What had happened between the two of them just needed to stop. No longer for his sake, but for Sasuke's too.

For a moment, he just looked at his other. Night and day. That's what they were. Total opposites. It never would have worked anyway. Naruto curses his feeble heart, yet stands pointedly with his chest grazing Sasuke's. Their bodies fit neatly together, mending each portion of their broken hearts.

''**Look, I...**'' He doesn't believe in god but he pray's he's doing the right thing. He tries to ignore the sound, how Sasuke's pain is choking him through the core of his soul and his mind calculates the retract necessary to keep his other safe.

He'll contemplate this ******** mess he created and believe his feat would be easier than it really is and maybe one day... if he's lucky enough, Sasuke will be there to hold him as he screams.

But he still can't walk away.

The blond goes numb, centering around Sasuke's breathing. It's so wretched and burdened, Naruto tilts his head into the crook of his neck. And all at once small fingers wrap round him again, in a full on embrace. Naruto sniffs, pulling Sasuke as close as he can get him.

_You'll never stay with me,_ he thinks.

He takes in Sasuke's being, his everything. And for the first time in a long while, a genuine smile curves it's way into his lips. He couldn't have needed anything else in this life. Just... now.

_''Damn you, Naruto. There is one person I still care for: You. And I hate you for this. I cant help it but...I care for you...''_

He can't breathe. His heart is pounding in his ears, deafening him to the world. Naruto grows still, hands tightening around Sasuke's form. Tears of his own are springing into action, though he barely manages to keep them at bay.

They had changed so much over the years. How were they suppose to move on? Everything was different. He couldn't just forget this. They both knew the truth now. Sasuke didn't hate him. It'd been a lie. A stab made at his weakest point - tricking him into giving up.

Naruto's lips graced the side of Sasuke's head, whispering indistinct words. In trade, it was his own sign of forgiveness. Not that Sasuke needed a sign. It was almost known to everyone that Naruto gave all.

''**... Sasuke, I'm not enough.**'' It was a hard thing to say, but he knew it was true. His mind soared at the admittance. But Sasuke caring about him wasn't going to be a long-lasting thing. One day, he would grow bored of the blond. Just like everyone else. And then they'd be right back here. Naruto didn't want that. No. He wanted—

_Forever_.

Forever was a very powerful word. Because to him, it really meant forever. Some people assumed it just meant until the end of their lifespan but it meant even more than that. Forever was after mid-life crisis, after sickness, after old age, and after death—whatever happened to be after that. And it went on even after whatever was after death—after heaven or rebirth. Forever was...forever.

And for Naruto to want forever, well, that was something that amazed him and scared him all at once. Sakura had mentioned being together forever once, albeit she had meant it as friends. She wanted to have someone dependable to fall back on, who was moderatly wealthy, to joke with while raising a couple kids, and grow old together—forever. Naruto hadn't thought twice about it.

Sure, he had been a little nervous when he saw her dating other guys, and he had figured she already had a few alterations made to her plan. Forever sounded nice and quaint for the two of them. A tidy ending for what he couldn't have. But now forever wasn't so sweet anymore. It wasn't that simple.

''**I can't keep losing you.**'' Naruto said quietly.

It was then that two hands went up around Sasuke's neck and he tilted his head up slightly so that his lips would brush against the other's ear. A much more intimate gesture than the last. In a sense, it was the same as before—the same type of feeling that came over Naruto. He did not fight back, nor did it take him by surprise.

The blond breathed with relief, his heart grattifying this result. A tiny voice, however, didn't feel so complying. It swore and stomped and screamed. Told him he was an idiot for doing this, that he would be better off killing Sasuke and everyone in his way.

Naruto swallowed thickly, his hands trembling as it became a little louder. He tried to block it out, and after several moments of just taking in Sasuke's strength, things became quiet again.

''**Please. Stay with me.**''

R&R please?


	9. That Fine Line

**Thanks to my reviewers, you guys make me happy. I appreciate your comments and attention and I hope you keep reading and enjoying this story!**

**That Fine Line**

_~Don't let go  
Don't let go  
__**~To my love~**_

_Can I get to your soul  
Can you get to my thought  
~__**Can we promise we won't let go**__?~_

_All the things that I need  
All the things that you need  
~__**You can make it feel so real**__.~_

_Cuz you can't deny  
You've blown my mind  
~__**When I touch your body**_

___**~I feel I'm loosing control**_

Sasuke's POV

Sasuke momentarily goes numb, and his eyes take a blank expression when he feels Naruto's arms reaching up and wrapping around him, dragging him close in a long desired embrace. He sighs, tired, but he is not opposing to this. He feels content right now, in Naruto's arms.

He feels bad for giving in like this, he feels bad for being weak in front of Naruto, he feels bad because he cant finish what he came for. Instead, he started off something else, more dangerous. Something he thought he had long before got rid off: bonds.

He shivers as he feels Naruto's hands around him, keeping him in place, where he really wanted to be, despite his mind screaming to him that he is weak, that he is an idiot, that this is not what he ought off doing right now.

But he ignores it all. Cause Naruto apologized once more. Cause Naruto still refuses to see Sasuke for what he really is. Cause Naruto still loves him despite the monster he is. Cause Naruto is his only safe way out of this lonely world.

Cause Naruto, is the only person he will always abandon to return back to later on. He knowas it is cruel, he is in fact sick of hurting Naruto and everyone that cares about him. But his path is that of an avenger, and he has already walked out of it, this very moment that he is resting in Naruto's arms.

He knows this and he accepts it. It is a sacrifice he is willing to do for his best friend, his strongest bond alive, Naruto. He is also willing to do many more things for him. Things Naruto would ask him, things Naruto as a hokage or as a friend would need him to do.

As a person with everything that comes with it. But stay in Konoha is a whole different matter to him. A favor, a chore, a whim he could never bring himself to do, not for Naruto but for anyone. And mostly for him, himself. Cause old wounds hurt and cause past never really fades when you love…when you hate…when you can't forget.

In Konoha, there is the house his family used to reside, the one that got slaughtered by Itachi, his beloved and once hated and misunderstood brother. In this village, there lay all of his former friends and people he used to know, people who once looked up to him, but anymore he is nothing more than a mere selfish criminal in their eyes.

He has betrayed them all. How could he ever accept to go back after having committed one of the things he used to hate so fiercely his older brother for: Betrayal?  
His tears havent still stopped running down in between his and the blonde's skin, when he hears the later's voice, feeling his ears with their lonely shade.

_I am not enough._

The sound of his voice still haunts his ears, lingering as in an accusing tone, but the sadness in his words seems almost tuned in with the tears that roll down the hokage's eyes and onto the avenger's pale skin.  
He shivers lightly, burying his face further against Naruto's neck.

He feels a bit of anger struggling inside him but he ignores it. He reminds himself once more why Naruto is acting like a kid in disbelief, a kid that has lived its whole life in the shade and when they suddenly tell him there is a thing called sun, a thing called light, he denies it stubbornly.

But isn't this what Naruto really is? He always lived his life so far thinking that Sasuke was hating him if not being coldly indifferent. And now that he is having his feelings in the plate for him, he just cant believe they are there, he can't extend his trembling hand and touch them, cause he fears its just another illusion of the ones he made back ago when he couldnt come in terms with the idea of an emotionless / despising Sasuke.

His heart shivers more in pain as he feels sorry for Naruto. He feels bad knowing he was just another source of pain in his cruel lonely life so far. And he would give anything to make it up to him. Even if he had to do it the harsh way, the way that Naruto wouldnt get…

He raises his arms and wraps them tightly around the hokage's figure, heart beat against heart beat. He rubs his back softly, wondering if he really deserves all these tears. No, he doesnt. Yet, what Naruto said is true and he could never change that.  
_  
You'll never deserve anything I give you._

He doesnt hurt about that, he knew it from before. And bitterly, he agreed with it. Accepted it. Cause it was the truth after all. He had never done anything for the blonde other than sending his way new waves of bitter disappointment and disloyalty all the time.

''**Sadly, the truth is…you're much more than I deserve**.'' Sasuke whispers, and its a bitter acceptance.

He knows Naruto is far too lenient on him, he knows he doesnt deserve any of it, yet Naruto's literal and non embrace is too sweet for him to deny this very moment.

His body stiffens as the next words are making rounds in his heads, taunting his heart's strings, so much that he has to grip on Naruto tighter to control his emotions:

_I can't keep losing you.  
_  
His heart is aching, cause he is almost waiting in agony, expecting whats going to come on next from his friend's mouth. He didnt want that moment to come, he'd rather die.

His life has never been a fairy tale and it cant start being like one now. That is what Naruto always failed to get. But it was in his character, his optimistic vivid character to never give up and see life as a bloody war field that can transform into a spring field anytime if you just want it with all of your heart. But life doesnt work that way. Life has its own wants and humans are mere pioneers in its game.

They werent allowed to have any wants and if they did, life made sure to punish them for that. Sasuke knew that far very well so far.

''**I don't like leaving you behind**.'' his husky voice came as if it had will of its own, his lips moving to let the sound out, without parting from the warm soft skin he was resting his head on.

Imitating his voice, his lips started now acting on their own, his mind absent on the whole act, his heart being his only guide.  
He didnt care what he just said, he didnt care what Naruto had said or what he was about to say. His feelings had waited long enough and were searching for a way out.

And at this very moment, Sasuke didnt care if it was wrong to treat a same gender person like that, or if it was right. All he knew was that it was love taking form in actions and for some reason his mind went numb on that and let emotions take on the rest.  
The aformentioned wet from his own tears lips, started sucking and nibbling onto the hokage's skin, affection being their leader into their bold action, and not lust.

His soft cushions traced all the way up and down on the blonde's warm soft skin, never parting, refusing to miss its warmth. His eyes closed not too tight, not too soft, in order for the raven to take in all of the scent the blonde had to give out to him, to remind him of that familiarity he used to feel in the past when around him. Safety.

Leaving small kisses on the hokage's neck, all along its length, his head suddenly came to a halt, ceasing its light tilting as he felt Naruto's soft adored hands landing on his own pale neck and lips of the said person brushing gently but lovingly against his ear lobe.

The move itself didnt really take him by surprise- being for the tiny amount of time they had been in each other's presence for the day, they boys had got pretty fast accustomed to each others physical contact.

What really upset him was that this move had a weird kind of aura surrounding the hokage's moves.  
It felt as one of those preliminary acts someone does, when he prepares someone else for something important or meaningful to follow.

Sasuke knew that all far too well from experience. And Naruto was far too predictable, at most, to make this easier.

His lips left the hokage's skin, but he didn't let go of the blonde man, his hands still in a grip around his precious bond.

He tilted his head slightly upwards.

_Please. Stay with me._

Sasuke sighed in tiredom. He couldnt say he didn expect it. Yet, it didnt hurt any less. Cause he couldnt just do what Naruto was asking from him. He couldnt go back in Konoha, too many painful memories, too many hostile faces, too many hypocrisy for his likes.

But above this all, he couldnt stay out of…Naruto.  
If he went back, he would make everyone forgive his raven haired friend and ex avenger. He would make everyone pretend that they respected him and that he was welcomed.

That they didnt feel butthurt for him betraying his village. That they werent afraid of him. That they didnt trust him. That they didnt think that their hokage had gone crazy and to be less lenient, immature and selfish.

Yes, that was what everyone would think of Naruto if he welcomed Sasuke back into Konoha.

Selfish, immature and a bad leader. And Sasuke couldnt do this to Naruto. It was the best thing he had achieved for himself, his dream, ever since he was a kid: to become a great hokage.

Sasuke could still remember with how much passion his blonde little friend was boasting and day dreaming of how he would become the fifth hokage one day.  
He could still bring back in his mind the light of those cerulean childish eyes when he said those things.

And he couldnt ruin it for him. He wanted the people of Konoha to look up into his friend, as he did. Cause he knew what a wonderful person he was deep down. And he wanted this to be clear to everyone.

So, with cold hear and his tears drying slowly, he let his arms fall limp to his sides, giving up on their intense embrace.

''**That is one thing I could never bring myself to do. I am sorry,… Naruto.**''he says and with that he slowly pulls away to look his friend in the eyes, to make sure his message-despite how harsh it was- got through.

His heart was already aching in bitterness, he hated hurting and letting down Naruto once more but his care for him was too much and too deep to just let himself give in his feelings for the hokage and accept his offer…No, not offer. More like give into his heart wrenching plea.

He looked into Naruto's sad eyes, waiting to get slapped or something of a similar emotional outburst. It wouldnt surprise him. He absent mindly wondered if the tears had stopped falling from his eyes.

Naruto's POV

Naruto Uzumaki was a simple man. He had a set list of things things he liked and things he did not like; and there was usually nothing in between. And because he was so simple, Naruto enjoyed the smaller things that got overlooked in life.

Like the stars peeking through his window, or having his paperwork finished, maybe even a bowl of ramen; anyone who met him could tell exactly what type of person he was. He was just that easy to read.

And most of the time, he preferred it that way. Better to be honest than shady, he'd say. So naturally, Naruto came to loathe things when they were complex. He wasn't even that great under pressure.

Which also explained why being Hokage had been running him into the ground. Because at first, he'd wanted to tackle the struggle head on, but instead, found himself being pulled under by it.

The reasons went on and on: taxes, schools, theories, religion—life was just too busy. Sasuke had always made it to the top of his to-do list though, right underneath FIND.

The Uchiha's existence was Naruto's only reason for getting through the day. The other reason was that he had no interest in dying without him nearby. It was not that Naruto was clingy, no. He just... god. He considered himself 'smitten'.

Okay? Enough to hold onto any shred of hope he might find toward reaching Sasuke. So he lived day by day, week by week. The blond never even looked further than next month unless he absolutely needed to.

_I wish I could fix this,_ Being so loyal.. it had something to do with being alone most your life.

That's what he blamed it on. Naruto admitted this very fact the rainy evening when a man dressed in black approached him, and informed him of Tsunade's passing. It was complicated to think about, even now. Naruto hadn't gone to anyone for advice- let alone comfort -since he thought he was lucky enough to even accomplish some meager skills as a ninja.

Let alone, go on to do anything more with his one-dimensional life. But from there, he somehow entered himself under consideration for Hokage. He couldn't remember which one of his counselors had convinced him his current image wasn't fitting for the title, but they had. Perhaps it was best that they did, though.

Or maybe.. it wasn't.

Either way, Naruto discovered that time slipped by much more slowly when you spend hours trying to be spotless or inane.. thus stalling his search for the Uchiha. But it didn't matter anymore.

Cus' after years of being shoved into papers and told he was to blame if the slightest thing went wrong—Naruto no longer had the courage to verbalize how much he missed the raven. There were simply too many words to describe himself with. Like the way Sasuke growled, or the way he'd become totally quiet. Naruto even missed the way Sasuke would fold his hands so neatly under his chin. The way his eyes would grow distant, seeing something no one else could.

He really didn't care about who he was. What Sasuke became. Let alone how they were together. Or why. As long as he was with him, Naruto couldn'tve cared if his a** were on fire. He'd let the repercussions for their choices come. He'd have a chunk of his heart torn out in the end, and watch it get stomped on. He'd take hours of misery from Sasuke's abandonment, or violent speeches.

But when he'd finally cry uncle, get carted away to that obese office he loathed so much, Naruto swore he would do it with a smile. It was easy to imagine a life with Sasuke: all he had to do was make sure he stayed. Things would be simple, easy, and a much better end. However, these thoughts also made Naruto become anxious, afraid that everything might come crumbling down on him within seconds.

Cus' god knows Sasuke never wanted anything but Itachi's death. And even if he did stay, Naruto knew he wouldn't be with him long. He enjoyed his freedom too much, and for Naruto to even request such a thing as he had.. it was doomed to begin with.

And so went the cycle.

Sasuke was the closest to home he'd ever had; the closest to family he'd ever experienced. Naruto's feelings would never fade for this man, because as far as he considered, it was impossible. So Sasuke would be his best friend, if that was all he could have. That would be good enough, Naruto bargained. It had been for all these years.

_''Sadly, the truth is…you're much more than I deserve.''_

The light melted from his eyes when he saw that Sasuke thought such a thing of himself, and was instantly reminded of when he muttered such a thing aloud. Blue eyes leaked more translucent tears, cascading onto the raven's skin just as Sasuke did to him. He doesn't want Sasuke to think that. Because they were just words. Something to say when your mad.

But Naruto can't come outright with it. Can't keep saying he's sorry when he knows Sasuke will hold onto those words and burn them into his skin like a label. Naruto's fingers smooth out over the planes of Sasuke's back, holding on like if he just waited long enough.. everything would be fixed through some force of magic. That they would go back to how they use to, as kids. With muddy faces and a lifetime ahead of them.

_''I don't like leaving you behind.''_

Then don't.

He wants to say this, but won't. He's a statue, waiting for the clouds to come plundering overhead. His grip is loosening on the angel before him, slipping from reality. That fox is talking again, snickering at his ignorance. Naruto wants to snap at it to shut up, but knows it won't. Even if he begs. Cerulean orbs settle on gazing straight ahead, through the dark tendrils of his face.

Among many things, Naruto understood Sasuke was all about the heat of the moment. While he, on the other hand, was about something longer. The sudden attachment to his neck was testament to this.

But Uzumaki didn't care. Sasuke could use him for whatever he wanted.. a rag, a punching bag, a friend. So long as he had more time. As long as he got to stay here, for just a couple extra minutes.

_''That is one thing I could never bring myself to do. I am sorry,… Naruto.''_

He wrinkled his nose.

Man. How stupid could he be? Of course he wouldn't stay. God, Naruto! Think! You knew this would happen. Why would Sasuke have ever wanted this? A life at home. With _you_, no less?

''**A-ah..**'' Drawing apart, he knew he was going to pretend it was alright. Pretend that his world wasn't breaking down.

Because he'd predicted this would happen. And yet, he put all his chips on black anyway. It was a fool's bet. And even though he had been the one to bring it up, he wasn't in the mood to talk about Sasuke's absence anymore.

But since he had zero control over the conversation, he wanted their time together to be perfect and for the arguments to be put on hold (because yes, if this meant anything to the raven, he would resume his habits of being a Hokage to cover how much he hurt.)

''**No, it's... uh, don't be.**''

He didn't even think. The words fell from his lips before he could scramble for a better response. It was far from perfection, and as a reconcilement, the blond straightened himself into one of his trademark statures, becoming rigid with legs parted at equal lengths. His chest broadened out and started bleeding again, small tears of red.

Naruto let his hands rest casually by his side, mimicking Sasuke. It was like he doubted his resources and strength, but somehow managed to keep himself together. Because being Hokage meant one had to be dignified, responsible.. and...

Above making mistakes.

Face flaming red, he decided the dirt was much more interesting than Sasuke and inspected it relentlessly to avoid eye contact.

''**I... I could come with you. For a... ah, while.**'' It was embarrassing to suggest and he felt exposed.

What if Sasuke thought it was stupid? Pf. Of course he did. He'd just flat out rejected Naruto minutes ago. What made you think he was going to change his mind about wanting the blond to follow? He finally lowered his stare from the nearby dirt to his shoes and raised one of his careful hands to his neck, rubbing the spot where Sasuke had been.

His jaw was locking up, another part of the performance. It meant that crooked smile of his would build up soon enough, and his eyebrows would smooth out into a reasonable curve. He was trying to avoid situations like these. Above all else, he should have been arguing.. not resorting to this. It was a child's demeanor, where one had to wait for permission to do something. And like many other things, he just couldn't grow out of it.

''**It's...it'd be easy to...run.**'' His voice was smooth, no longer carrying a ragged edge.

He wouldn't be surprised if Sasuke lied to his face and pretended he approved of this, then went running for the hills. He had obviously been lying about being happy around Naruto, which sort of gave him a little bubble of desperation. That and the fact that he had let himself be tricked by compassion so many times in the past (though it did give him a kinda guilty feeling because he was starting to feel like one of Sasuke's stalker/fans).

Naruto would be sad to leave Konoha but he would get over it eventually, right? Yes. He would. Just as long as Naruto remain useful and perfect like this, everything would be better.

''**I mean, it's okay if you don't want...**'' Naruto rambled.

He was trying to compose his word choices, like he always did under stress. Slowly but surely, he was slipping away, disjoining himself with the conversation. Deep down, Naruto knew this wouldn't work. Sasuke would turn his back on him anyway. See right through the charade. He would call him a loser, or a dobe, then run off to be with his little snake-squad someplace.

''**Wait. I mean, uh, nevermind.**''

Eyes expressing a false confidence he'd lost years ago, the Hokage shifted back another couple paces. His hands assumed a safe place inside his pockets, clenching into fists as he assumed this 'perfect' role again. He realized Sasuke was still crying. Hell, he probably was too.

''**I get it. You don't... I mean,**'' he paused, closing his eyes for a moment.

To others, it might seem like he was irritated. But to Sasuke, he probably just looked like a bumbling puppy.

''**I get it. Okay? Just...**''

**If you want this story to live a long happy life, please R&R. 3**

**Ria.**


	10. Too soon, too late

**Authors' note: Thanks to the ones commenting me. But I have to say this or I will burst. I have this story written almost to its end, and it has many chapters to go still. But trust me, if I don't get a decent number of reviews this time, I will just let this story die and not update again. I get it , you are bored to comment. And I could as well say I am bored to keep on writing, though. But do I? It's rude, I can see a lot of people are reading this. If you care enough for this story plz review once in your life? And dont tell me it is cheap fishing for comments. I have seen people with worse stories doing this and they still get reviews.**

**If you have been following me, you will have noticed by now how little confidence I have when it comes to my stories. If you cared enough about this story, I get it you'd review to keep me going. Yet most of you stay indifferent. I doubt most of you are even reading this. Well, guess what, you're being inconsiderate. You could at least tell me to bother or to not bother with it? Save me some time, ya know? Idc if you think I am rude or what not, I have had enough with it. So, unless you review, I take it this is last chapter I am posting. ****Have fun.**

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**Too soon, too late**

**Sasuke's POV**

The raven haired angel looked apathetically into the blonde hokage's eyes.  
That was an option he had never thought about before, until the hokage let it slip out.  
He kept his stare stable in the cerulean sad eyes, his face emotionless. His tears had stopped falling, or that was what he could figure out since now that he was calmer, he could come to realize that he could no longer feel their smooth roll down his pale cheeks.  
It'd be…easy to run.

Sasuke looks at him as if he is crazy for a moment. Can he really mean that? No, the Naruto he knows cant. Or can he? Which does he love more? The village of Konoha or the traitor that he once called his friend?  
Sasuke doesn't know. He is confused himself. More than anything else, Naruto's suggestion seem to be a spur of the moment kind of thing to say. Naruto is like that, always emotional, always letting his feelings take over and affect him, whether for good or bad.

He doesn't know what to reply to this. Accept the blonde to come with him and damn him in the same run away fate he has condemned himself into? Naruto isn't a criminal. He is a hero- he saved his village from Pain, he fought Gara of The Sand and made him change to good…and many other heroic like things. Yet again, if he runs away with the traitor, the missing nin whose disgrace covers all the lengths and wides of Konoha and has got people cursing for his existence all around in it, people will forget anything good about their savior and proceed into calling him a traitor, too. But does Naruto deserve that? The answer is no. Cause he is nothing like that, if only always faithful to his rich feelings.

And what if Sasuke takes him along? How would they survive? What would they do? Too men alone together for the rest of their lives? That's one thing society would find hard to deal with, and so would he. He knew Naruto could care less about what people said but Sasuke ever the reasonable one thought of other things, as well. Such as the need to find a wife to restore his clan. If the blonde was a girl, he'd be more than willing to take him along. He knew he cared enough for Naruto as it was, to be able to tag his feelings with something almost as similar as love. And he knew Naruto loved him back in his own unconditional unlimited way.

What kind of life would he damn Naruto with, if he took him with him? Certainly, not a good one. It wasn't the right time to be a hypocrite and he knew that. If he cared for the blonde as he had said, the best option would be to turn down his offer and disappear for good from his life, letting him live his calm life as a hokage in the village of Konoha.

But damn, the raven, he had a heart too, a human one at that. And no matter how hard he denied it, he had feelings too and he was allowed to be selfish for once-wasn't he always, anyway? What was so wrong about him being himself? As in vengeance, now it was time to be a lil bit selfish to heart themes, too.

_I mean, it's okay if you don't want.._

What could possibly make the blonde man think that Sasuke wouldn't like to take him along? He would die to, actually. But it was a hard choice, that was all. And no matter how cruel his stoic silence was to Naruto at that moment, he couldn't help but just stare back in the blonde's cerulean sad and hope filled eyes as if trying to read the answer to all of their problems.

He tilted his head slightly downwards, the sun was already setting and they wouldn't have much time alone if the Anbu decided to feel alarmed for their missing hokage.  
It wasn't such a good idea after all for Naruto to stray his path that very day.  
Sasuke looked at the ground, in deep thought and cold pregnant silence. He had to say something, soon.

He had to make a crucial choice that would have drastical effects on both of them.  
Option one would just make him hate himself for eternity and even more for burdening Naruto with his traitorous fame.  
Option two, would let them both go back to their ordinary tracks and no obvious damage would be done besides the long suffering that would follow in his heart for never being able to go back to his blonde again.

Both of the outcomes seemed kind of terrible to him. He didn't want to lose the dobe, HIS dobe, the only alive bond that had remained in his lonely pathetic excuse of a life. So far he had lived for hatred but now that Itachi was down-even if unfairly-what did he have to live for? Perhaps for love? Could he find it in the face of a certain blonde?

Somehow, he wanted to follow that road. He felt like a starved and deprived from pleasant emotions kid that needed a helping hand right now and the hokage was his ideal savior. But what did he have to give back to his benefactor if only for the life of a run aways and society outcasts?

His eyes averted back to Naruto's, studying his tired face , secretly moved.  
He didn't want to think that it was only for the heat of the moment, because Naruto suggesting this meant a lot to him.

Seeing the blonde's eyes shine with a fake confidence and hurt admittance, he was able to read his thoughts.

He probably thought that the raven haired man would think low of him for suggesting this thing, or wouldn't take him seriously. Well, if he did, this would only just be a façade to convince the blonde hokage that this was a stupid idea and lead their ways to option two.  
But his heart was struggling to not give it to him that easily.

''**Naruto, you…**''

''Wait. I mean, uh, nevermind.'' He was cut off by his blonde.

Sasuke smirked at the blonde's expected words, but sighed tired in the same time.  
It was a difficult situation. How had he messed it up so bad for himself and Naruto?  
Of course, the blonde would never even hope to think that the raven would want to have him by his side? Sasuke was always the distant one, no one could read into his heart and even if he had told Naruto that he cared for him, actions always spoke louder than words.

Option one, would make Naruto think that Sasuke did care, short term, but that was just a façade, masked by selfish emotional reasons.

Option two would make Naruto hurt or even hate Sasuke and think that he was indifferent to him. Which was far from the truth. Cause long term, hopefully, one day Naruto Uzumaki would come to realize that Sasuke did it all for his blonde glory.

So, now what? Prove that he was honest and he meant it when he said that he cared or be selfish and take Naruto with him?  
So much contradiction. His life was full of it. His relationship with Naruto was, too.

One more tear had escaped his thoughtful onyx eyes and had graced the paleness of his cheek, which he didn't fail to miss by the way Naruto's eyes widened at that.

He was crying again? He raised his hand to his cheek and wiped it off. No it was just a single tear.

''I get it. You don't... I mean.

But it was enough to give his inner struggles out to Naruto.

Sasuke looked at the blonde, sealing his beautiful eyes behind his exhausted pain writhled eye lids.

It was turning angsty and Sasuke figured he had to speak soon. Make up his mind. And may God damn him if he wanted. But he knew what he wanted and he would claim it, for once, for himself. Not for his family, not for Itachi, not for any dead relatives that gave him anything but pain, but for himself and only.  
_  
I get it. Okay? Just..._

Sasuke looked at Naruto rather overbeaten by the inner struggle. He had a slight frown and he closed his eyes as well for a while, listening only to the sound of the wind playing with the leaves around as if he was trying to find his answers in the wise voice of the universe.  
But that voice was silent now. And the only voice offering to be heard was his own inner one, which was far less wise and reasonable than any other kind of voice at the given moment cause his emotions were taking the best out of him.

He breathed deeply and took a step closer to Naruto. He opened his eyes in a slow relieved motion. He had made his choice. He didn't care if it was wrong. He had made it now and there was no going back.

''**Naruto, you idiot. You offer to leave everything behind for the spur of the moment and I am willing to let you do so. Who is more pathetic between us two?'**'Sasuke asked with a slightly ironic teasing motion. It was more of a rhetorical question, like declaring that he wanted Naruto to go with him but also admitting that it was a bad idea in the same time.

He frowned slightly, his heart was ligther now that he had laid out his wishes to Naruto but his mind was giving him pain.  
He ignored his logic that said he was a greedy selfish b*****d and a hypocrite and his eyes shined with new heat momentarily as he looked again at Naruto.

He would rather spend his life sad but with Naruto, than happy and carefree without his blonde. He knew that the truth was that Naruto would be sad either way he chose.

His face took a serious expression as he raised his hand to touch the face of the most precious person to him on earth. He cupped the blonde's chin, forcing Naruto to look into his onyx intense eyes.

''**Just know that I don't have much to give**.'' Simple as that.

His husky voice still lingered in his ears. His eyes bored into Naruto's, trying hard not to stray cause he wanted to look anywhere else right now.  
He knew it had sounded unintentionally cruel but he was blunt like that. He wanted to make sure that the emotional blonde could think for himself and realize that a life tagged along with the raven haired traitor would have a great toll on his own name and way of life.

His hand moved from the blonde's chin to his cheek, in a motion to stroke his cheek bones with the back of his hand.

'**'But I need… what you have…**''he said, before he could realize it, his voice leaving smalls gaps of silence between the words.  
He savored the feeling of Naruto's skin against his fingers, wishing there was a way to make things simpler. He had taken his decision but was Naruto mature and certain for his own?

_Only time could tell…_

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**Naruto's POV**

Naruto's life had officially become complex. I mean, it was one thing to admit that being Hokage was wearing him into a thin skeleton of what he use to be. It was an easy truth. But to actually leave it behind? Completely different plain of dramatics entirely. And to make things harder, the reward he would recieve for such actions was _Sasuke_.

Out of all the things in the world, the raven was the one persona he'd ever forsake Konoha to. Because heaven knows Naruto didn't care if they hunted him down. If his people called him dirt, or hated him. To be honest, it was an easy price he'd be willing to pay time and time again. He just didn't want to lose the other. Sasuke was the only thing keeping him anchored to reality. And if he left.. what would the Hokage hold onto? Have faith in? Now that he thought about it, either path he chose in the next ten minutes.. would most likely have him killed, or without his other. Most likely the formentioned. Six feet under without a pine box. That's what he'll be. All Naruto had left to do was decide whether he wanted anyone to care if he was gone. The blond hated to admit such things, but it was obvious.

If he went with the Uchiha, Sasuke probably wouldn't show a hint of remorse at his passing. And Konoha wouldn't miss another traitor. At best, he'd be a smudge on their history. Nevermind the hard work he put into saving the town for the past couple years.

But if he stayed.. Naruto would remain this empty shell. And eventually, people would be furious with him for 'dying too soon'. Claim he didn't accomplish enough. The whole thing was infuriating. He had been convinced his choice was the correct one and that if it meant staying with Sasuke, he promised himself to do anything. Reflecting logically, this perfect idea might not be quite so perfect.

Still, he didn't regret thinking of it. Didn't regret saying he would leave. Sasuke outweighed his sense of duty by a mile.

_''Naruto, you idiot. You offer to leave everything behind for the spur of the moment-''_ The blond cringed. It was like having salt rubbed in a open wound. _"-and I am willing to let you do so.''_

Wait. What?

_''.. Who is more pathetic between us two?''_

Naruto forced himself to look at him. And suddenly, he got this overwhelming urge to touch the other. Sasuke said it was okay, Sasuke said it was _okay_! He let his mind chant the response, snuggled in the warmth of it's acceptance. Then, he felt a hand on his cheek. It was solid and perfect and so natural as if he always had it there.. always had that connection.

''**It's a tie.**'' he stammered, face aflame.

''**...Like usual.**''

He couldn't help it. He gently clung to the hand on his face, stroking it with his thumb. After a while though, he dropped the hold. God forbid Sasuke think him any more of an emotional sap. So, when he stopped, the blond carefully closed his eyes. His Hokage mask was slipping where the pale hand had touched, but for the most part, Naruto blew it off.

''**You really mean it?**'' he murmured suddenly, believing himself to be half dreaming and practically in bliss.

Blue orbs fluttered to examine dark hues. The sun was setting in the background, each color of it's dying day becomming violent yet alluring upon the raven's face.

''**Your not toying with me?**''

Silence. It dawned upon them like a raining darkness, enveloping the pair in it's plunge. Naruto held strong, only looking at Sasuke for confirmation. The world around them waited to turn. To continue on it's tilt. But Naruto ignored it. He needed to know if this was the truth. If Sasuke really wanted him. Or.. if he wanted another game.

_''Just know that I don't have much to give.'' _

''**Your all I want.**'' He whispered, looking at the raven with understanding.

Uchiha was telling him it was a bad idea. And in so many ways, Naruto knew. He was just tired. Tired of everything. Of waiting, especially. As long as they were together, the blond knew nothing else could matter.

''_But I need… what you have…''_

The words jabbed at him, cutting to bone. His heart seemed to stop for a moment, confused by what that implied.

What did Sasuke need?  
Entertainment? Food for his snakes?

Naruto chewed on his lower lip, not caring how childish it was. The voice was speaking again, grumbling how he should be right in these doubts. His stomach twisted, understanding this. The fiery tails of the beast swirled in it's prison, echoing with laughter.

_It's messing with me. It... it has to be._

He shifted, escaping Sasuke's palm.

''**We better... get going.**''

It was then that Naruto's eyes met those of Sasuke once more. His jaw automatically clenched and he looked at the other with a sense of trust. He couldn't believe that he was about to do this. A traitor? Someone had to be really screwing with his head. It had not fit into the plan for his life. Had not been part of this image. Most of all, it scared the _crap_ out of him.

So he raised trembling fingers to the band tied at his forearm, trying in vain to unknot it. But that didn't stop his lips from smiling, or his heart from knocking painfully against his ribs. He could barely get the first tie off before his body started shaking; nerves racking his spine and grief for never seeing home again.

At last, he seemed to slip it off, faded ties hanging lifelessly in his hand. The fox within him raged at this incompetence, but urged him forward. Everything was silent between the two, and it unnerved Naruto. Blue orbs wavered, trying to burn the headband's image into his mind.

_It's all for him._

Hand tilting outward, the blond kept his gaze discreetly away. He was giving Sasuke his headband, offering what was left of himself.

''**It... it won't be hard...t-to run,**'' he repeated. Nowadays he would never say things twice. But for this occasion, Naruto made an exception. The words were meant as much for himself as for Sasuke. He wanted him to know that this was alright. That he wouldn't turn back.

Not ever.

Because that's what best friends do for each other, right? Since forever Sasuke was his life everything else would come afterwards. It was hard to change that kind of mentality into something more rational and mature. It was frightening and somewhat impossible, really. No matter what though, this would just lead him to the tragic end to his tragic story. He just wanted Sasuke to be with him, when the curtains closed.

The wind howled against the faces of past hokage, and Naruto took a deep breath. He didn't catch the sound of footsteps approaching, or the lights from Konoha reflecting up at them. He was still waiting for Sasuke to just _take_ the headband from him. To lead him away from home.

''**Hokage!**''

And with one word... it was like a waterfall of events.

Large eyes widened. The boy opened his mouth to say something to Sasuke.. to run. To do anything! But an arm slipped around his stomach before he had the chance, dragging him away from the dark angel. The band slipped from his fingers, and the air in his lungs followed. Naruto coughed, feeling the arm tighten. In honesty, the ninja probably had no idea he was hurting Naruto.. for gods sakes, no one should be as frail as him.

''**S-sasu-**''

''**You hurt the Hokage!**''

It's a scratch. Don't exaggerate, idiots!

''**Uchiha Sasuke, by the diress of Konoha, we place you under arrest. Resist, and we will be forced to harm you.**''

No... no! This wasn't how it was suppose to go! Naruto wrinkled his nose, a tan hand reaching out toward the other. Another anbu stepped between them, totaling their numbers to four. A tiny whimper ghosted from his lips.

What Naruto wanted wasn't really a surprise yet the anbu had no idea. Why couldn't they be more perceptive? Naruto wanted to leave. He struggled against the anbu holding him, only to be told he was safe. That the traitor couldn't hurt him.

''**He's not a traitor dammit! Lemme go!**'' he spoke, free hand planting firmly on the one wrapped around him, trying to pry it off.

Jeez.

When did anbu get so buff?

''**I **_**order**_** you to let me go!**''

''**Hokage, I'm sorry. This is for your protection. I have orders to bring you back.**''

''**F-from who?**''

''**... Lee.**''

* * *

_** R&R?**_


	11. An Early Good Bye

**An Early Good Bye**

**Sasuke's POV:**

Sasuke smirked half sadly for the sake of the good old times when they teased each other. He couldnt have expected another answer, really. It was a tie. He found it funny and yet melancholical. He really felt like hugging Naruto again but he resisted. He figured it was too much closeness for a day.

Sasuke observed Naruto's face, seeing as the blond was trying hard to keep a cool mask which was though irresposive where his hand was lying on his skin. He kept quiet, he knew better than this.

It was a hard choice for Naruto, no matter how immature his blonde friend could be at times, when he had a serious matter to deal with he could become the most mature person ever regarding that matter and he usually pulled it off quite well. He always admired that in Naruto, the ability to face serious situations with maturity even when he was loud and a dobe all the other time. At many times, this also made him wonder, where did Naruto find that maturity.

If all his wide grins, foolish pointless jokes and immature brags were only a facade to fool people….But fool them for what? He always remembered how Naruto hated being taken lightly out of his clumsy personality. He had no reason to fake such a person. This beat Sasuke and sometimes he couldnt help but not trust what Naruto was giving out. Others, being too busy with his own issues, he just gave in the flow, imitated every one else cruelly and just thought of him as just a loud dobe that couldnt help himself.

Upon his next words, Sasuke found his hand twitching lightly on Naruto's cheek and his onyx eyes took even a darker shade if possible.

_You really mean it?_ (Naruto's previous words)

He opened his lips to say something comforting, something that would put Naruto out of his insecurities and just eliminate the dark shadows of their past that were haunting his heart and made the blonde skeptical against the raven.

He had set up himself for this but he really hated for his best friend to doubt him. It hurt. Yet again it was only just a question, it really didnt mean all that much that the blonde man mistrusted Sasuke;s words, but more that he had a hard time believing them out of Sasuke's usual coldness.

But this impression got torn to shreds when Sasuke heard the next question coming up.

_Your not toying with me?_

Sasuke's lips twitched and stayed partially open for some moments as in contemplation, then they closed only to part again when the raven took on a stoic and cold in the same time mask that was serving as a facade to hide his upset and anger. It was another thing to doubt him-which still hurt a lot even if he deserved it fairly- and another thing to be told straight in his face. And there he thought he was the one being blunt.

''Naruto, you're such a fool if you think that. Why would I accept you to come with me if you were just a toy? Do you think I am in the mood to hear your loud voice all day just for the laughs? Trust me, this is not the case.''

he said, in a slow and low tone, in his husky voice as his onyx eyes glared both secretly shyly and strictly at Naruto.

A faint color of pink tint took over his pale cheeks momentarily at that confession. He hated opening to people about his feelings, he was more of an action person but Naruto had that effect on him and he hated this. It was like the blonde was forcing him to spit it all out even when he didnt do anything about it.

As darkness fell around, Sasuke couldnt help but narrow his eyes for a second when the blonde;s voice filled his ears in an eerie way.

_You're all I want._(Naruto's words from previous chapter)

He actually felt like smiling when he heard that but since this was so unlike of him he kept a serious emotionless face even if he knew he was relieved he had heard that, he had taken that kind of answer. Somehow, though, he knew already this would be what the blonde would reply.

What he didnt know though was whether the blonde really had thought of it in depth and meant it or if he was talking for the sake of the moment again. And knowing the blonde, Sasuke was more towards believing the later. He sighed a low sigh and looked at Naruto with examining eyes.

_I am far less. But you __aren't able__ to see this…_

Instead of wording any kind of thoughts that were flooding his tired mind at that moment, he chose to be his typical laconic self and restrained himself only to one word-which though meant the world to him.

''Naruto…''his eyes got a softer look now, running all over the blonde's face as if searching for any sign, for any crack behind the cheery mask on the kitsune's face, where he could discover any sign of weakness, any sign that this was just a lie as he was afraid of.

The next thing that happened caught him off guard.  
He had just told Naruto that he needed what the man had to give to him, yet the blonde reacted badly to it, as if the raven had slapped him across the face.  
He watched with secret hurt pride and heart as the blonde turned his face slightly to the side to escape Sasuke's cupping palm and shifted to the right.

His empty hand fell limp on the side, empty as his heart for some infinite moments. He tried to absorb the look in Naruto's cerulean eyes. They seemed to show mistrust, hurt feelings, fear….but fear of what?

Upon Sasuke realizing what could have possibly bothered his blonde friend and ex teammate he sighed, impatiently this time and tapped two fingers absent mindly on his shoulder, as if trying to undust something, long forgotten. So Naruto was willing to come all the way with him, leave everything behind and risk his life for Sasuke but he wasnt willing to believe him when he said he cared for the blonde dobe one bit, was he?

Sasuke took a step back from Naruto, thinking this maybe was such a good idea to begin with. Maybe Naruto wasnt as ready as he thought himself to be in order to follow Sasuke blindly and abide with him for the rest of his life. Sure, they could split up in the meantime, but such major decisions such as leaving Kohona and the hokage place along with this werent usually ones that were taken if one wasnt sure for what they wanted. But now with Naruto doubting him so intensely, Sasuke was starting to doubt their whole plan. Which was one and simple for the time being-escape together-. But it hold more to it than just those two words cause running away would mean a lot for both of the afterwards of their tired lives.

Somehow, they both needed a break and Sasuke felt that. But he couldnt talk, he couldnt assist Naruto in hs decision. He had done his best warning him a little while ago, choosing not to be selfish and Naruto chose to brush it off only to doubt him again later on. Naruto was such a child in so many ways and Sasuke didnt know if this was out of the past emotional wounds he had brought upon the blonde or out of the raven's bad name as a traitor. And either one he thought, the same great much it hurt to think of it.

His mind, lost in his own- contemplation about what they were going to do thoughts-, absent mindly registered the fact that Naruto had moved around again and that he had said something among the lines that they should get going.

His eyes shifted from the cerulean ones only to look around him. He had known for some good long moments now that it had got dark and that they shouldnt be there, but he hadnt done anything about it, too caught up into trying to solve this deep deal with Naruto. Once more, he reminded himself why it was no good getting emotional and he turned on his heel, feeling slightly annoyed that this had taken so out of hand.

He turned back the moment he heard Naruto's unsure voice again, unstable and akward as if he wasnt that sure of what he was talking about even though he seemed so hard to come out as certain.

_It…it won't…be…hard t-to run. _(Naruto's previous words)_  
_  
_Are you sure about it?_

He laid his eyes on the tanned figure, his eyes slightly widening and then retaking their usual range, as he noticed the sentimental kitsune extending a hand out, holding his most precious head band.

Oh how many memories were brought back to Sasuke upon observing the object hanging from the hokage's hand, for some brief moments. A bitter smile tried to make its way to his thin lips but he pushed it back, not wanting to lose more time to trivial reactions and things.

His eyes crept up back to Naruto's with a questioning look. Why was Naruto giving this to him? Wasnt he coming along? So what was the deal with the head band? Was it a sign to warn him for something? A memorial when hed run and leave him behind after the first few days or a contract of devotion and commitment?

Sasuke didnt say anything, even if his lips parted for some split seconds. No sound came out, his mind too busy and too tired to make something clear out of this.

His hand twitched on the side and his mind was screaming to him to take the head band but for some reason his hand always stayed in the same old forgotten position, his eyes boring into Naruto's as if he was trying to find a bigger reassurance for his devotion than the blonde could give at the moment.

Snapping out of the moment and realizing they didnt have time for stupid contemplations, his hand slowly started moving towards the head band but it stopped up mid air, when the next voices he heard registered in his mind as the most dreaded anbu alert.

''**Hokage!**''

''Shi-…''he whispered so low only he could have heard himself.

They had caught them. His hand dropped back to his side, in a defeated and dissapointed motion he managed to hide behind a cold proud mask.

So, that was it. Their brief dream had ended so abruptly, in the less desired way. He blinked slightly, not sure if he really wanted to move. He knew Naruto couldnt run now, he knew he shouldnt, wasnt supposed to help him,- most of all he knew this was a bad idea from the start. And yet he had let things take that way. How foolish of him.

He eyed Naruto, noticing the slight hurt in his eyes. Boring his eyes silently into the dobe's blue pools, his own gaze became a bit warmer as if one of comfort for the misunderstood hokage.

He wanted to run, to set him out of the anbu's grip and wrap his arms around him, claiming him as his own. He was the only one Naruto should be devoted to, he knew the dobe chose him over Kohona anytime, so why did those anbus have to ruin their moment, their reunion and take him away?

Wasn't Naruto meant to be his? Why did he have to share with Konoha? He knew they didnt really care for him but only viewed him as the victim willing to carry on his shoulders the burdens of a whole tradition and even be succesfull in the end.

They were disgusting him. They were the same people that despised the blonde when he was just a little loud kid with the misfortune to have a demon sealed in it. No one seemed so understanding back then. And nor do they seem now. They didnt even plan to give them time for any proper good bye, either. But this was expected.

Sasuke knew he was thinking very selfishly now but he didnt care. He was just tired. Tired of things never going his way. Tired of always having to chase after revenge cause happiness just wouldnt cross his road, and when it did, it always fled scared of his misery right off, just like now with Naruto.

''Uchiha Sasuke, by the digress of Konoha, we place you under arrest. Resist, and we will be forced to harm you.''

With those thoughts, and Naruto's hand stretching for him, the anbus annoying voice registered partially in his mind, but he didnt care. He wasnt scared, afraid, or anxious anymore. He was just mad. That they were ruining his chance with Naruto. His chance to live a god damn proper life for once. Why did Konoha enjoy so much making her sad children even sadder?

He always had that wonder ever since an orphan outcast at the steps of the ninja academy, when he was forced to face the world alone and mother Konoha instead of helping only kept asking for things normally didnt go asked to a 12 year old.  
Sasuke eyed the anbus angry.

''Hn.'' He growled, but his face still seemed peaceful but for his angered glare.

He didnt bother replying back, his concern only over how that anbu was treating his own master in such a harsh physical-hurting way and pressing that arm over that wound Sasuke himself had opened to the hokage.

''Idiots, don't hurt him.''he said in a low but sure deadly tone as he took some slow steps forwards.

His eyes shifted around all of the anbu squad, only to pin in the end back at Naruto's.

''Tchk, tchk, hokage-sama, didnt you tell your friends that this isn't the play ground? They seem to be confused.''he said pointidly, trying to take the anbus with a bit of bitter irony, bitterness just as the one he felt inside him right then.

And with that, he jumped on the air, spreading smoke bombs around and flying kunai. Many of them found their target, knocking the anbus momentarily down.  
One of them also managed to hit the anbu that was supressing Naruto on the face, and as a result the guard back stepped harshly, losing his grip on Naruto and falling on the ground some good meters away.

Sasuke had used his sharingan to see through the smoke and fog the bombs had created all this time and so he knew when that certain anbu was on the ground and exactly where. He smirked satisfied, that one kunai seemed to have exactly the strength he planned to target it with.  
He also spotted that Naruto was still immobile, probably dazzled by the sudden unexpected attack.

It was really pathetic of the anbus to think they could restrain the Uchiha and he was finding it amusing if not a bit annoying in the same time.  
As it all had happened in a matter of split seconds, Sasuke made his way back to Naruto, closing any distance between them, only space separating them their breathes that mixed in anxiety.

He knew Naruto could see him now, since they were nose close so far, so he made no effort trying to signalize who he was to him.  
Instead, he looked seriously into his eyes and he took the blonde's face into his hands gently.

''I am sorry, Naruto. I can't do this to you.'' He whispered in his ear huskily.

He pulled back only to look Naruto again in the eyes, unsure of how to say good bye in such a dreaded moment where their dreams had turned to dust so fast and unfair.  
Another second passed before he closed his eyes and leaned in forwards and slightly upwards to plant his lips on the hokage's forehead.

The kiss lasted just for two counted seconds but Sasuke tried to take Naruto's essence into him as bad as he could, cause he was really in need to feel him right now and their time was limited.  
Finally, he pulled back without giving Naruto any time to react and with that he was gone out of the scenery just as he had come into, that very morning he faced the hokage.

Wasnt it really a tragic irony how he had gone there with an empty heart and was leaving in the same way? Nothing gained, nothing earned. Just emptiness. Seemed as if God didnt want to spare him some sun light into his lonely path. But he was used to it anymore, thus the emptiness. Heh, not unusual for him, Uchiha Sasuke.

But somehow, he couldnt tell why it was then, when he felt tears running down his cheeks as he made his way out of the cliffs and back to the forest where his team was waiting for him.

**Naruto's POV**

The price we've paid, he thinks. Was it worth it?

Naruto had forgotten how many times they'd put each other through this kind of turmoil over the years. How many obstacles he's had to stumble over, break down, before reaching his goal; his everything. Naruto swallows thickly, admiring the raven. How could he begin to put a number on the amount of blood the pair have spilt, on the agony each has rendered. It was impossible. It was mortifying. Naruto cursed the times they lived in, and wished things would be different. That their lives alone had turned out different.

The hand on his cheek is quivering, but Naruto isn't worried. Sasuke is the strongest person he's ever known. Nothing could tear him down. The boy built himself up from tragedy. In honesty, it made him wonder. I mean, what was he thinking? Had he really come back here just to kill Naruto? And now, decided he preferred the idea to take him along? It was thrilling, don't get him wrong. Naruto knew in the pit of his gut he'd do anything for the raven.

But.. there were so many things he wanted to ask. So many things he wanted to say. Sasuke's eyes grew dark, and with just a few moments, Naruto stopped himself short of asking anything. He felt childish, and mildly ashamed for the questions.

Never mind, the fox roars. Your better off not knowing.

_''Naruto, you're such a fool if you think that. Why would I accept you to come with me if you were just a toy? Do you think I am in the mood to hear your loud voice all day just for the laughs? Trust me, this is not the case.''_ Sasuke said it in such a slow and low tone, Naruto felt as if he were foolish.

He nods numbly, taking this to heart. So Sasuke didn't want him as a joke. The blond drifts off into a sea of images, far away from the current situation. But through the haze, he doesn't miss that pink on Sasuke's face. Or the way he looked embarrassed, despite the mask.

The darkness was coming, claiming the village below with it's encroaching wrath. If only everyone would change. And if only things would go their way. And if only... if only...

''_Naruto…_'' He doesn't need to say much else. Because Naruto gets it. Sasuke is looking for a sign, a reason to doubt. But the Hokage holds fast, refusing to shift his gaze. He doesn't have need to. Because what he said is true, and he won't take it back. None of it. Cus' what he said is true.

Things were shifting again, and going sour. He knows this, but can't fix it. Both were going to have doubts no matter what- albeit about which thing, was totally in the air. They could never agree on a whole lot, but at that moment? He bet there were a mix of things they might comply over. The idea itself was pretty sketchy, but Naruto had faith. Faith in the Uchiha, like always.

The headband was only testament to this.  
.. But it turns out, time was not on their side.

Naruto had never held much enjoyment of the night, so it wasn't much of a surprise that it betrayed him so.

''_Tchk, tchk, hokage-sama, didn't you tell your friends that this isn't the play ground? They seem to be confused._''

It was a threat. A barely concealed one, but a threat none the less. He watched Sasuke curiously, taking in the hatred that marred his face. Secretly, it never ceased to catch him off guard. How quickly his best friend snapped into the role of a murderer. It scared him, too. Not to an extreme degree, mind you. Because Naruto had been on the receiving end of those glares in the past.

But that didn't keep him from cringing at the memory of bones cracking and blood splitting, either. His raven was a cold-hearted killer. Plain and simple. It was what he wanted to be for years. What neither of them ceased to realize, either. And watching him move so fluidly now, this understanding was even more clear than ever.

_He should be running._

He watched as Sasuke jumped into the air, his lithe figure sending smoke bombs in all sorts of directions.. plummeting to the ground between him and the other Anbu. Naruto lost the Uchiha for a moment, and struggled more vehemently because of it. If he didn't try hard enough.. Sasuke might leave him behind!

His thought was disrupted when the man holding him suddenly slumped back, the sharp intake of breath slipping from the blond as he stumbled away.. wrapping an arm around his injury collective-like. He still couldn't see much, blue eyes straining against the grainy illusion of smog. Naruto knew his captor had not perished, he could hear the wheezing some feet away.

But that didn't matter.

Where was Sasxx

The space around him was suddenly small, and warm. Naruto blinked, feeling the dark shadow of Sasuke before he actually understood it fully. He embraced this, knowing how dangerous the situation was becoming. No one else would dare to get as close as Sasuke had, so Naruto held no doubt that the person in front of him was really the Uchiha.

''**We s-should...**'' he stammered. Hands were drawing back to his face; gentle and assured. Naruto looked at him, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth.

It was in that instant, he knew.

Sasuke wasn't going to take him with him. The Anbu had destroyed any chance of that. Naruto cursed himself for being Hokage in the first place, and stretched a trembling hand to the collar of the Uchiha's shirt, clinging to the fabric. It was irrational, sure. But it made Naruto feel better, knowing Sasuke hadn't left him yet. That they still had a bit more time left.

''**Your... going w-without...**'' Trying to admit it aloud, Naruto choked. His eyes had drooped, crestfallen to anything else but Sasuke. They were too late for this. For any chance at happiness with one another. When had he messed things up so badly? If only he'd been a little faster. A little stronger.

_''I am sorry, Naruto. I can't do this to you.'' _

The words sent tremors up his spine. Don't say that, he wants to scream. Don't leave me again! Black molds with blue, except Naruto can't get the words out. He's caught, in the last free moment they'll have together. His throat gets tight; constricted. The blond sniffles, wishing this could go any other way. He doesn't want to say goodbye. Doesn't want this to be the end. But there was something right about this motionless moment. Even in the empty memory, something felt perfect about it. Even with that driving hatred, that had once been absolute motivation to the pair. There was nothing but calm. Like tearing at an open wound; out of sight things felt better, even with the dull aching throb of pain underneath.

Another second passed.

''**There's gonna be more coming.**''

_There'll be no way out, if you don't run._

''**H-hokage!**''

The voices are so far away. To Naruto, they could be days apart. He lost Sasuke's gaze, and felt a rush of panic as the boy leaned close. No, no! Don't say goodbye. Don't do this! Naruto returns the gesture, clamping his water-logged orbs tight and trying to forget how close the raven is. How much he wants to stay here, like this. Within Sasuke's reach, forever. ''**Please..**'' Lips press to his forehead, leaving an inivisble mark. Naruto loses all sense of understanding, his heart pounding so hard he could hear it echo in his head.

They've got two seconds.

He wants more. God, he wants so much more than what they have. He wants that forever on the horizon. To be able to lean in close. To capture five seconds and stay there, breathing. An extra three to reach out, touch his face. The rest he doesn't want to count; he couldn't 've even thought about time, but pull back and wonder. How many seconds to a kiss, just a quick one? How many to a good one?

''**I'll delay them,**'' he whispers. And it's tearing him up inside, but Naruto knows it's all he can do. Cus' Sasuke needs to leave. Whether or not he gets to, too. Naruto's trying to come to terms with this; forgoing the previous notion of forgetting Sasuke. Time is slipping away, it's shroud of promise deluding into a cruel future that he'd only have contemplated in nightmares.

One more second, please, someone, please!

Sasuke's pulling back, not giving him a second thought. The blond doesn't move, but his body is shaking. His mind is screaming at his legs to move, to follow. But he can't. The smog is clearing, and Sasuke's already halfway gone. _I wish we had more time.._

''**Where is he? D-do you see the Hokage?**''

Chin tilting downward, Naruto gives in to a moment of weakness. He feels so cold, feels so beaten. Sasuke has managed it yet againxx to leave him wishing, hoping, for a better way. Maybe it wasn't too late, the fox murmurs. It's tails are flicking, unnerved. Footsteps are shuffling all around, trying to find their Hokage. But he didn't care. He was thinking, debating, how much time he had left. Not to be with Sasuke, but to catch _up._

You have less than a minute, the fox says.

He blinked, jerking forward. He was glancing around wildly for Sasuke; wishing he could catch his fading form. For a second, he forgot he was the Hokage and reverted back to the mentality of their old team days - a completely flustered, stubborn a** kid who was now staring at the faded dust where his best friend once stood.

_He's really gone._

Naruto drops down, finally, and there was a moment of tense silence before either one of the Anbu responded to him. Naruto knew it had been coming. Sasuke would go away because there was something going on more important than the two could ever conquer.

''**Hokage Uzumaki?**'' A voice calls, looking down upon the crown of gold that had been flattened by sweat. Naruto frowned, tasting ash and bitterness in his mouth. But the name had done it's part, and was dragging him back to who he was. Who he was _suppose_ to be.

''**I'm alright.**'' Naruto held up his hand to stop the encroaching footsteps, and shook his head, ''**Really, I'm alright.**''

Slowly, he rose back to his feet, glaring at the dirt as if he could blame it for the events alone. The Anbu were hovering now, barely scooting away enough for the Hokage to move freely.

_It must be the scratch. They act like they've never seen blood before.._ For some reason he didn't think it was that big of a deal. Because really, it wasn't. These guys were worried about superficial wounds. Especially since the injury had stopped bleeding several minutes ago; clotting by itself.

''**Sir, do you wish us to entail a pursuit?**'' Everything they said was just confirming his suspicions about the extreme hope he'd reserved for their almost-escape. By now, Naruto was sure everyone knew about his disappearance. Not that it mattered. The blond just wanted to go home, now. Get away from this memory as fast as he could.

''**No. Don't. I'm tired, and I've got enough paperwork as it is.**'' Naruto gave the meek response, feeling a pair of hands slip against his arm as he stumbled down the Hokage's faces. Naruto's lips parted to protest the help but he didn't say anything. Obviously, his opinion would be moot anyway.

Blue eyes shifted in the opposite direction, intent on sorting which way Sasuke might've went again.

_I'll never see him again._

It wasn't a question. Or a doubtful thought. These words were stated like a fact, and Naruto's heart shattered with it's reality. He tried to recall every aspect of the man in his head, hoping to retain as much as he could about his raven. His best friend...

His traitor.

''**It's not just your disappearance, sir. We need to make sure **_**this**_**, doesn't happen again.**''

Don't worry, he whispers. It won't. Cus' Sasuke'll never come back. The humiliation over his previous promise had scarred him, making the abandonment all the harder. I mean, how was he suppose to face Konoha? He'd opted to leave them not twenty minutes ago! Let them drown in their economy. He'd traded it all. And why? Because he wanted _Sasuke_.

Well, look what that got him.

People bombarded him as soon as the blond set foot on the gravel roads, a tangible relief sweeping over his village's face. Sakura Haruno, was among them, and got to work quickly patching the injury on his torso. His counsel weren't quite as considerate, and once attaining the information that he was indeed alright.. they dragged him back to the office(while the poor boy was just two streets short of home!). A shirt was tossed in the blonds' face along the way, disgust marring their features.

''**We have to speak with you.**''

They all chattered quickly and brusquely, demanding to know what course of action should be taken against 'the enemy'. Each elder mocked him then, noticing he denied the very idea of such a title. They told him Konoha thought him a weakling; and worse, a sentimental fool. Naruto just shrugged. ''**Let them.**'' But that didn't stop the questions.

Days went on, and nothing changed. Lee appeared several times, pressing the matter.. but he brushed it off. Paperwork didn't get finished, food wasn't consumed, and sleep was avoided. All Naruto could think was to stare blandly at the open window in his office, at the empty gaze of the past Hokage.

''**Naruto...?**''

''**I'm leaving for the day.**''

Silence. The boy stood, counting the seconds til' someone told him NO. All Anbu had been dispatched to his home and office lately.. another perk his counsel had set up. However, when nothing was said, the Hokage looked dazedly over his thin shoulder, catching the eyes of his assistant, and another ninja he'd never met.

_A rookie.._

Prejudicedly, he decided he didn't like this person immediately. Not because of anything personal, oh no. But the mere sight of the kid was enough to rip open fresh wounds, and send him springing toward the door.. dying to leave.

His hair bounced right along with him, falling into his eyes at a number of angles. Blue eyes wavered, deciding to block out the number of Anbu that followed. He grew dizzy for a moment, a hand catching to the nearest wall. He frowned, free hand shifting to clutch at the withered bandages on his chest.

The price we've paid, he asked. Was it worth it?

No. And it never will be.

His footsteps were soft, and sorted. Because image is still everything. The Hokage entered the street, dropping his hand from his chest and stuffing it into his pocket. Shouts escaped the crowd as they fumbled about, instantly aware of their Hokage. Many people stopped, in fact, and examined him; as if searching for some type of obvious disfigurement that would've come from being with Sasuke.

Golden locks tumble across his face, riffling with a passing breeze. They'd wanted power. Both of them. And once you have it.. there's no turning back. He had no way to reverse the hurt they've caused each other. And it killed Naruto to know this. Because for as long as they were apart, being torn away was even more painful.

_If they'd have come two minutes later...I wouldn't be here._

The Hokage extended his gaze upward, watching the passing clouds with a sad smile. Was Sasuke looking at the same sky, somewhere? Was he reaching for it, like Naruto was? An arm stretched out, ignoring the estranged looks he received.

He took comfort in the idea, but it put him even more at ease to know that his Uchiha was even alive to begin with. Because god knows that if he had gained anything from their interaction, the Hokage knew his avenger was at least doing well for himself.

Naruto traced childhood steps to the old training grounds, and settled easily into the crook of an old tree. He didn't think twice about it, just fell back. Marks coated the bark of this life form, another creation scarred by it's past.

''**I hope you'll be okay.**'' He chewed on the inside of his cheek, repeating the words a second time. His smile was fading. Fingers were getting numb, tracing the lines of absolutely nothing on a overbearing root.

* * *

''_Will Sasuke be okay, though? Or will someone else get hurt instead?_

_Stay tuned to find out more!''_

R&R plox.

K, I am posting this for the few people that like this story and **bother** to comment. I shouldn't be that nice with you, guys, though, cause you're not with me. I see many new readers everyday, yet the same old story keeps going. Almost no one bothers to comment. Is it such a stretch? It's just to click a simple button all there is to it. It's not as bothersome as you think.


	12. How Fate Swings

Thanks for your comments, I replied to everyone who commented via pm. I want you to know that I am grateful for your time and attention. Please, keep sharing your thoughts with me. xxx

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** How Fate Swings**

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**Naruto's POV**

Konoha had been obliterated.

And Naruto Uzumaki, the last Hokage to this great village, perished along with it. No, not in the literal sense. That would've been too easy. Too fairytale-esque. The blond fox was alive, but felt as if his soul had been torn from his body. Albeit in essence, one _might_ actually describe him as dead. Or a walking traitor. To him, there had always been a clear line between the two.

Yet, here he was. The blond had settled in the middle, broken and alone. He'd lost everything he'd ever worked for, and now.. he was useless. Utterly useless. He couldn't do a thing to stop the prisoners from dying on him- or their cries of agony.

It was no secret that Naruto blamed himself for the war, because it had come so suddenly he hadn't even had time to properly assemble a resistance. Let alone, a strategy. And naturally, in his time of need, Naruto'd resorted to his most valuable resource: his friends. Many of them complied, albeit few were forced to stay back and protect the village.

Kiba Inuzuka, Hinata Hyuga, Choji Akimichi, Tenten, and Neji Hyuga. Five of them. All incredibly strong, all talented. They had agreed to be Naruto's soldiers without a second thought. All of them had marched off into battle, heads raised high. They'd just been so sure of themselves, it unnerved Naruto. Because if asked, he knew they wouldn'tve been afraid.. and said that so long as their Hokage believed they were right for the job, nothing would happen. The five said they could handle things, no problem.

_So foolish…_

Naruto remembers how he'd sent a couple of Anbu along with them, just as an added reassurance. Tenten'd mocked him; told him he worried too much. Still. He loaded them up on kunai and scrolls. Made each person promise not to get hurt, or to be careful.

That was five days ago.  
And none of them had returned.

The blond was devastated, thinking about the people he'd lost. How many friends and dependants who'd looked to him had suffered.

_...I killed them all._

Battered palms wrap desperately against bruised ribs, trying to hold the broken spirit in place. Everything about Naruto ached, but he knew he deserved it. Deserved the long scratch that tore across his chest. The burn mark on his left shoulder. And if anything, he deserved more. He'd let down so many people... it'd be fitting if they just killed him. Ended the miserable shell he'd become.

_This is all my fault._

Blond locks tumbled against the side of his cheek, covering a nasty bruise that'd formed there.

At night, he could still hear the screams of his people.

The attack had occurred two days ago, and at the time, Naruto remembers he'd been pacing the office. People had been pushing him to the brink lately, prying a desperate edge that Naruto couldn't shake. The frail boy hadn't been eating much either, and refused sleep. He'd just stayed there, in the room. Filing paperwork, and scrambling for plans.

''**Naruto! Naruto!**'' A voice catches in his head, like a broken record. Naruto cringes with remembrance, thinking how nasally it'd seemed to him at the time. ''**Sir! We... we... You have to-**''

And just like that, everything was gone.

The next couple hours exploded before him, erupting behind murderous laughter. Naruto remembers he had looked at the flames outside his window in awe, terrified by the incredible jutsu pushing down on his village. Various ninja came after him, trying to drag the Hokage to safety.

But he wouldn't go.

''**Dammit! Forget me! Get the villagers!**''

In all honesty, Naruto didn't know what he'd been thinking. He'd been extremely afraid at the time, thinking the attack might be coming from a certain someonexx and how he might be able to stop this. Keep everyone safe.

_Sasuke didn't want you, idiot. Quit dreaming and focus!_

He'd believed he would walk away from the situation with a broken limb at best. But that wasn't what he cared about. Konoha was burning. It had been his home! The blond tugged free of the hand that'd been trying to cart him down a flight of stairs; afore ushering his assistant, Mai, to take his place. He had gripped her shoulders real tight, lines drawing around those full lips to form a desperate frown.

''**Please, don't do anything stupid.**'' he grunted, while shooing her after them.

Voices chased at his heels, but they died down quickly once something(or someone) smashed through an upstairs wall. The blond had just stood there, keeping his hands firmly pressed against a kunai he found, as if that was going to stop him from taking much damage in the oncoming threat. He attempted to shield how frightened he was of the person who had begun walking in the direction of the stairs, instead giving a showy growl.

He'd looked backwards but once; just to make sure the others got away.

''**Hey! I'm over here!**''

He remembers how orange jutsu poured around him like a static charge, and how his teeth had been snapping together when each footstep became louder, destruction in their wake. It wasn't an instant later when the ninja slammed him up against a wall, shaking his composure.

Naruto just hung there for several moments, being held up by the collar of his shirt, causing him to kick his feet in irritation. He swallowed hard when the man let go.. then felt a fist send him straight through the barrier. Naruto had really not expected it to be so fast, but had acknowledged his breath catching on some rubble. Tan hands had reached desperately into his pocket and procured what looked like another kunai then, permitting Naruto throw it violently to the man stepping inside the hole.

Naruto remembers he had watched as the man grunted, catching the weapon in a flurry, then sending it back at him in a sluicing motion; drawing a large line against his torso. The Hokage had screamed in agony, rolling to his side as blood drooled from his body.

_Please... o-oh god, I-_

If there was ever a time the blond had needed his best friend, it was now. Blue orbs looked at the shadow of a man as he closed in, and narrowed. Not once could Naruto remember feeling this man's chakra before. It was strange. Unique.

Naruto tried to see his face, but found that hidden from him as well. The figure was well built, though Naruto ruled out any chance of it being Sasuke. He wouldn'tve believed it anyway, if the man had called him a dobe.

A shaky hand had planted on the floor beside his face; allotting the Hokage try to weakly shove himself back up. A haunting laughter chilled his bones, fumbling up the smaller's spine and into his ears.

The man was laughing at him!

Naruto remembers how furious he'd been. How the deep grumbling had echoed from his throat. But... what he couldn't remember, was how the fight ended. Lest, how he escaped. Naruto admits to having blacked out quite a bit recently, but never for more than a couple minutes at a time. However, when he'd reawoken that time...? He found himself laying half-dead in the marketplace.

Not to mention, with two guys kicking the crap out of him.

''**You're not getting away this time, Naruto!**''

''**Heh... grab him.**''

Lecherous hands gripped onto each arm, dragging him up. They snickered as he cried out, making low guttural sounds that the Hokage didn't bother translating into words. His captors seemed to take this in ill affection though, and growled at the lack of horror on his face. He didn't understand what they'd expected; everywhere he turned, the smell of burning flesh and crumbling brick hit him.

Naruto's village had been dying, and the boy would've given anything to die with it. There were more men circling him suddenly, saying things he didn't listen to. A hard punch was delivered to his jaw, developing a soon-to be bruise. Blood trickled from his lips, and blue eyes locked dazedly to the person who'd attacked him.

_This has to be a nightmare,_

It was a woman. He couldn't make much out about her, but he knew she was a smug creature. She'd delivered another swift kick to his ribs, then abandoned the Hokage to the care of his keepers.

A weak whimper escaped his lips now, and Naruto pushed himself tighter against a corner. He was being held prisoner, with only a small bit of stitching to make sure he didn't bleed out in his cell. A biting wind continued to creep in from his makeshift window, nipping at the bare flesh of his arms.

_It's all my fault…_

The ninja slumped in his position, trying to ignore the soft aches that moaned for his attention. There were dozens of marks on the walls from where he'd been trying to escape; of which severely injured his last 'attendee'. Naruto buried his face in his knees then, trying to tuck himself away from the hell he's been promised to.

Naruto whispered the names of his friends, desperate to recall each face. Of every person who's life laid beneath his feet.

_It's all my fault..._

_

* * *

_

**Sasuke's POV**

Orochimaru was dead. Long ago. Sasuke had killed him when he found out the ill snake didnt plan to keep his promises. And this he was wiped away from his path. Danzou was next. Sasuke was very well pleased to be over with him, since he was one of the main targets of his revenge. Now it was left Madara but he had been useful up so far to him. They joined in a common alliance, each for their own sick reasons.

Sasuke complied to the burn down of Konoha because….of his revenge that he never completed out of his foolish ties to the blonde.

Madara, well, lets say he had been bitter that Konoha never apreciated his leadership abilities and always feared him, pushing him aside as something poisoned and in need to be guarded. Madara's plan was to destroy the current Konoha with as many of its citizens as he could and build his own, under his own government using the citizens that had survived and bringing people from the sound or other places he had visited and held strong warriors.

He had a vision for Konoha. A vision of making the hidden village of his origin the strongest among the ninja villages all around the known world. And he would achieve this by making its citizens to originate from great ninja tradition villages, such as sound.

He wanted them routhless. As a ninja ought to be, according to him. And for this, he would organize a very harsh ninja system in which their precious spores would be trained every day of their lives until they reached 20. Missions would start a lot sooner but training was a big necessarity for Madara.

Sasuke didnt care what would happen with Konoha. That village had been wipped out of the map of his origins, since Konoha had stopped being HIS own village ever since he learnt for the betrayal Konoha had accomplished upon his clan. He was no longer a Konoha citizen and Konoha had better not ask for his help anymore.

With that said, he had played a big part in the elimination of the current hidden leaf village. And he was satisfied about it. Maybe he would have let Konoha get away with it, one day long ago…if a certain hokage had followed after him and restored the missing happiness in his tired heart.

But they came up and stole even Naruto from him. It seemed as Konoha wanted to take away from him everything he loved and cared for: his family, his best friend, his dignity…  
And for this, he had finally revenged it and he remembered how smiled sadistically as he watched the fires burning down all the households, all the vacant trees, all those who tried to protect what couldnt be protected.

He had changed ever since that incident with Naruto. Not right away, of course. But it happened as time passed by and he realized he couldnt handle being away from Naruto. And in those terrible moments of melancholy and need his aching heart slowly refilled with hatred for Konoha and indifference for everything else.

After some time, the hatred became a casualty too, for him anymore, and it just remained as a cold mask gracing his outer world, only to hide what couldnt be guessed from those that knew him far too well ever since he started his campaign to get back at his brother: nothing.

That's right, he felt nothing. But he knew hatred was always a powerful weapon to his motivations and against his enemies, he chose not to let it show.  
Besides, even if he felt nothing, it more of leaned towards the evil side. He felt nothing when he slaughtered people, he felt nothing when he saw them crying and begging for their lives in front of him at Konoha, he felt nothing when he confronted a certain blonde back at the village and made him crumple onto his knees with just a kunai…

If he had seen Naruto long ago, he might have done something to work things out between them. Or even be as crazy as to ask him to run away with him. But those days were over now. He had dared to love him and he had paid for it with much pain and suffering and all coated by his repelling loneliness.

Naruto wouldnt understand. He would blame him once more for the monster he had become, he would let his tears fall in an effort to shake him out of his inner prisons of madness, he would do anything but make things better for Sasuke.

But truth to be told, even if he thought his heart was dead , sometimes things happened that made him think that it was just sleeping a peaceful sleep, cause when he had first heard that Madara had left upon him the guardianship of the hokage, he felt kind of thrilled at the idea of being able to see the blonde again in not war like terms.

But his heart had hardened a lot since last time Naruto had talked to him and now it was impossible to recognize something familiar and nice in the raven haired angel of death and revenge.  
Sasuke wasnt aware of this, but deep down he needed someone to take him out of all this coldness and insensitivity, indifference and emptiness he had fell into. And who was more suitable for the job?

Naruto,that'd be. Since he was the one that had caused it in the first place. But chances were that if they ever both realized what needed to be done it'd be a long road towards salvation for Sasuke, since even the little light that inhabited his onyx eyes once, now it had started fading slowly but stably, both metaphorically and literally.

Sasuke walked down the long corridors as he heard sound soldiers whispering something about how it was time for dinner and about armor supplies that had to be delivered.

He growled slowly, growing impatient for the moment he'd meet Naruto and see his expression when he'd learn that Sasuke was his captor for the time being. He was almost amused. It felt like a game and his dark eyes narrowed dangerously as he felt a familiar chakra approaching from fast from behind.  
He came to an halt, and took a deep breath.

''Madara…ever the sneaky one.''he growled huskily as he saw the shadow shifting from his behind to his side.

He turned his head to look at him, boring his onyx eyes into the elder's existance.

''What brings you after me? Are you here to change your orders?''Sasuke questioned raising a curious eye brow but keeping an emotionless expression non the less.

''Sasuke-sama, I was only wondering if it was a wise idea leaving this person up under your guardianship. I came to make sure the situation was under control.''he said walking and standing in front of Sasuke as in a protective mode.

Sasuke eyed him annoyed.

''Under control? Save your insults for your weak ninjas, Madara. I am sure you are perfectly aware of how I am the only one that can handle such amounts of power.'' he said motioning his head to Naruto's cage's direction, some cellars away.

''This is not where my doubts lay, Sasuke. I know you have had a history as teammates with the boy. I know you normally dont give in such pathetic sentimentalities, however I wanted to be sure if you…'' the tyran was cut off by Sasuke, who raised his hand in arrogant protest.

''Then don't worry about something as trivial as this. He and anyone coming from that filthy Konoha are already dead in my books.''he said, walking past Madara.

''What about your heart?''he heard Madara asking semi seriously- semi mockingly, but Sasuke ignored him and kept walking, choosing his silence to be the answer to Madara's hallucinations.

He was a fool if he thought that Sasuke was really so weak.  
After some foot steps, he was vaguely aware he had reached out of Naruto's cage, and he snapped out of his dark thoughts, glancing bored at the metal door.  
With a silent sigh, he pulled the keys out of his pocket and unlocked the metal midget, stepping in the room and closing the door behind him.

He eyed over at …a wreck of what Naruto used to be. His face momentarily froze-even more if possible-. What had they done to him? He couldnt explain why he felt a small pinch in his heart at the blonde's wounded sight.  
His eyes softened slightly as he made his way over to the blonde, carefully bur unphased.

''Here we meet again, hokage-sama.'' He whispered firmly but seriously, as his onyx eyes examined all over Naruto's hurt body, using his sharingan for better view since the light coming from the small window was minimal.

''I see you are badly wounded. Who would've thought? Nonetheless, I will call a medic nin to take care of your injuries.'' he said, and then a small silence followed as he made his way towards the candles and lit them up.

Light was spread around the room, making it possible anymore for both of them to see each other properly. Sasuke turned off his sharingan and his eyes locked with Naruto's tired ones.

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R&R, puh-lox!


	13. Again

Woot, thanks for the reviews, girls!(and guys? XxxD) I am glad some of you took the time to review this story! It gave me enough motivation to update faster. ;)

Darkmoon Fleur, thanks for being a stable reviewer, I think it's really kind of you to support me and my story with your comments. I hope you keep liking this. Yeah, it's in Sasuke's character to be messed up like that ahahahah but I promise things will turn out good in the end(I need to have at least one story with happy end, as all of my stories so far have bitter ending xD ahahahah)

AspergianStoryteller, thanks for taking the time to comment 3 chapters! I am really glad you like my(not entirely mine, it's the surreal's too :3) story. I hope you keep reading and enjoying the way things go!

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**Again**

**Naruto's POV**

The latch clicked.  
A million thoughts ran through his head; over a dozen of them screaming at him to run. Just get up, charge past whoever's there, and run like _hell_.

Too bad he didn't.

Everything around the blond became a haze of black and metallic coating, leaving him breathless and totally unprepared as the figure slipped inside. For the black eyes to bear into him as cold as the darkest night, yet still manage to start a fire beneath his skin. It was such an irriational process, though Naruto had never felt so alive.

_I can't... god,_

Naruto had been worried for the male in front of him. About how he was fairing, his health. He couldn't even remember how many months ago it'd been when they last parted.. but it tore at him, watching those raven locks shift against his porcelain face. Even in that dismal cell, his angel was clear as the moon itself. He knows he could've looked at the other tiny miracles in front of him: Sasuke's hands- calloused and hanging loosely by his side, the trademark blade dangling against his hip, or the shape of his shoulders beneath the robe. But he only stared at his eyes. Nothing but those eyes.

The wind whipped again, crawling inside the window. It had no force, no power. The cold bit at his fingers, but they remained still. He held his breath without knowing, captivated by the person in front of him.

''**Sasuke,**'' he said, very softly. Almost a non-existent word.

''**You're alive?**'' the disbelief was obvious, spoken like a request. A dream. As if at any second, the Uchiha would fade into shadows. Leave him here alone again.

''**You **_**are**_**.**'' he breathed. Cus' that's all Naruto could've asked for in this life. To know that the raven wasn't harmed, that he's even remotely happy. But the moment is soon robbed from him, just like everything else. A stab at his ribs jolts slender arms to wrap even tighter around himself; suddenly churning over the idea of what might be coming. Of what Sasuke might _want_.

He can't recall a taste for what has been settling in his mouth, but if he were to take a guess? It'd be fear, threatening him in such an undeniable way Naruto refused to speak.

Sasuke had been missing for so long. His presence symbolized just how lost Naruto'd become. How broken.

Naruto closed his eyes. And God, he get's lost in that voice. That voice! He repeated every syllable spoken in his mind, relishing beneath the one solid thing he has left. The only thing he hadn't destroyed. Naruto's forgotten how cold Sasuke can come across, said nature ebbing the contours of his face, brandishing all the wrong angles. The most obvious being his frown.

Naruto wished he could recall what the raven looked like when he was happy; every time he tried though, he stumbled across buckets of ash, of burning people piled along with his lost hope.

''**Don't call me that.**''

Blue orbs snap open, pooled with a hidden hurt and unmistakable sense of self-loathing.

''_**Ever**_**.**''

Hokage. In such a short few hours the phrase had become so foreign and unfulfilling. Then again, it didn't belong to him anymore. No, it belonged to someone strong. Fierce. Naruto couldn't even claim to be a fraction of those things. He was a coward. A fool. By all means, look at what he'd done to Konoha.

Look at what he'd let _happen_.

Naruto raised a dirty hand to grip at his hair, tugging vainly at the roots. He was ducking down, burying his face in his knees. Cus' in honesty, the boy was ashamed for Sasuke to see him like this. To be riddled with whatever was left of his existence. But stemming from that thought, he was also raking his head for a way to fix it. Fix Konoha.. and all the people he'd lost.

Words are leaking from his lips without realizing, a reflex he no longer controls. Naruto doesn't blink, doesn't care. Sasuke's image is fading from him, slipping away. He just sits there, continuing his previous task of matching each name with a face. Of picking who would've been better off with him not being Hokage.

_Ino Yamanaka. Shino Aburame. Konohamaru Sarutobi. Kurenai Yuhi.._

The names went on. On and on.

When Sasuke speaks, Naruto has to fight the piling destruction that is his sanity to look back at him. Leveling his gaze with an empty expression, Naruto realizes the Uchiha has changed. How? He didn't know. Something was different though. Something missing.

''**No. I don't want-**'' the blond shuddered, feeling his body ache against the numbing breeze that continued to n** at him.

Naruto didn't want to tell him that the medic nin had already been through his cell, and were the ones who'd given him the small stitching he had now. They'd tried to do more, but he wouldn't let them. Fell into a fit of hysteria he hadn't even thought existed inside himself. He wouldn't let them heal him, or touch him in any way after that. Nobody could. Since, by his degrading logic, whatever he didn't use would go to the other prisoners the few people he was still responsible for.

Maybe it'd save their life.

The ex-Hokage draws his legs closer, tighter to his chest. If there was ever a time he wished he could be invisible, now would be it. He watched indifferently as Sasuke lighted candles, making the strain on his eyes easier. And, his back press just a bit tighter against the wall. He's like a frightened animal. Trapped here.

''**You're too late.**'' Way late, he thinks. But better late than never.

The words he says are short, clipped. A mirthless attempt at a joke though no one's laughing. It's just him and Sasuke. Dumped together in this tiny cell, for reason's he doesn't even understand.

Naruto tugs harder at his hair, remembering the way he'd wished for the Uchiha to appear two days ago.. how he'd stocked all his faith in a person who'd never come. And look. Here he was. Only Naruto didn't want help anymore, just for somebody to kill him.

''**Konoha's gone.**''

And suddenly, he felt like babbling. Like crying. He wanted to tell Sasuke everything that'd happened. About the things he'd witnessed, the things he'd heard. Naruto didn't think he'd ever forget the sound of their home crumbling to nothing, about the stench of dying friends... or how incredibly sorry he was for not doing the one thing he was built to do; _protect_. Tears well up in his eyes, and the male folds in on himself for the umpteenth time that day.. cringing with the memories.

If only he'd become anbu instead of Hokage.  
If only he'd gone with the five.  
If only he'd died.  
If only  
If only  
If only.

''**It's really gone,**'' his shoulders knot, shifting against the invisible burden he carried. Naruto's forehead bunches up, distressed by the things he can't ignore. By all he had wished for, and for the things he's telling Sasuke. The raven probably doesn't even care, but every bit of this is tearing him apart. Leaving him in shreds, nothing but bloody imprints on the floor.

''**Everything.**''

It was a hollow, empty laugh. The sound ruptured his lips, forcing him to tremble with weakness. Because slowly, Naruto's losing bits of himself. Hell, he doesn't even think there's anything left to lose.

''**E-everyone's dead.**''

The blond looks to Sasuke, expecting to find something they both know he'll never find. Not even if he chipped away at the hard layers keeping the Uchiha from him. He'd never find the remorse those people deserved, or a hint of regret.

He realizes why the avenger is probably here.

Why he was _really_ here. Naruto's heart throbbed at the understanding, but accepted it all the same. He'd known Sasuke was a traitor long before this. So why should he be surprised? The Hokage blinked, thinking again how many people were lost, how it was his fault.

Did Sasuke come here just to tell him that.. ?

Inwardly, Uzumaki bet on it. He may not know much about anything, but he thought he knew Sasuke, once. He thought Sasuke would have had no other reason to come here... to a tiny cell that wreaked of day-old blood and misery, unless it were to declare dominance.

''**Am I... did I-i imagine it?**''

The idea left his lips before he could catch himself. And as a malformed consolation, the blond bit back the desperate sob that threatened to follow, drooping his head to look at the tops of his knees. Don't answer, he prays. You need'nt bother. Naruto already knows.

''**I wish... I wish I d-did.**''

* * *

**Sasuke's POV**

Onyx orbs bored apathetically into cerulean eyes, as his mind absorbed the essence of the blonde's voice.  
_  
__Are you alive?_

He didnt feel the need to reply to this, seeing as Naruto was probably in a hallucinating state of mind. Instead he kept silent, watching over the ex hokage, his eyes running over his wounds.

He didnt know why, but something inside him bothered him and annoyed him in the view of those external traumas. He didnt like seeing his ex friend in that state. He didnt know why it affected him so much, since he used to think he had been over the blonde long ago, back in those days he was struggling with his loneliness and was in the first step of planning his revenge to Konoha along with Madara. He eyed him carefully as he made a few more steps closer to him.

And there he thought his heart had frozen, that it had become an ice cold flat door made of ice that would never open no matter how many times you'd find yourself knocking on it. And there Naruto could manage to make that door tremble without even raising his hand to simply touch it. His voice, his familiar long missed glance was all Sasuke needed, to feel a wave of melancholy feeling his veins and mind and poisoning his mind with something he had long forgotten and swore not to give again into: care.

He looked at the blonde man who was hugging his knees so clumsily, his heart skipping a bit at the wave of regret that hit him. But it soon was gone as was his melancholy. Sure he had convinced himself that he didnt need Naruto anymore but he never wanted the blonde to suffer or be badly hurt. He looked at him kinda frustrated at the idea. He thought he had asked the ninjas not to hurt the hokage.

But with Madara still being on charge, no one gave a crap of attention to the Uchiha.  
He felt like a babbling chicken that no one listens to cause they are busy doing other things. Yet he knew most of them would run away if were to face him on one on one battle. Wusses.

Naruto's voice snapped him out of his thoughts again. Oh kami, how much had he missed that voice of his that used to haunt his dreams back in the day. He remembered how he longed to hear it all day, and do nothing else. Just listen to Naruto talk and say anything…he didnt care what, his voice was enough to send his mind travelling on unknown relaxing locations. Take his mind of his pain, his loneliness.

_Don't call me that_

''As you wish, _Naruto_.'' Sasuke complied, his eyes never parting from the blonde.  
He understood how Naruto was feeling right now. He knew him too well to not understand, to not be able to read him.

He suppressed a small smirk that threatened his lips. If only he had chosen to go after him, everything would have been different now. And even if this wouldnt sound as nice to Naruto's ears, Sasuke could never bring himself to admit it out loud to him, it was too much for his pride to take.

He knew already that Naruto wasnt the 12 year old baka he had met at the village, and that he most probably had figured out why Sasuke was there. Why he wasnt by his side when the war busted out.  
It was a good thing that he didnt need to phrase out with words what needed to be said. Cause they both knew, in the small silence that followed what they really meant to say to each other.

One part of him wanted to comfort Naruto and tell him that it wasnt his fault but it was Konoha's for being so useless and relying everything only on one person. Not because he once cared for the blonde man but because he really believed this. Sasuke wasnt one to sugarcoat things even for those he cared for. His other part chose to remain apathetic to this, feeling there was no need to expose himself because Naruto's reaction was sporadic. But was it really? He wasnt sure. The war after all wasnt such a small thing not to have a deep and long lasting impact on the blonde. The truth beyond all this was just that Sasuke didnt know how to handle a sad and broken Naruto. He was used always to see him determined,optimistic, hiding everything behind a smiling facade.  
_No. I don't want_

Sasuke snapped out of his dark thoughts once more at the blonde's voice.  
How he hated it when Naruto was being stubborn like a kid. In the same time it reminded him of their team 7 era and this brought up some melancholy again into his tainted soul.  
He smirked , but his expression was just more than serious. He slowly approached the blonde, now towering over him. He looked down on his folded figure, with a hint of secret pity. He really needed to be taken care of.

''I dont care what you want. Obviously, you are not in a place to take decisions for yourself. And you will be taken care of, under my commands. 'he said coldly in his characteristic arrogant tone. He wouldnt let the blonde get some infection of the wounds and have him die.

In no way would he make it that easy for him. Besides, being Madara's ally, he still had some business to end with the man, such as making Naruto tell him where they hid the forbidden jutsu scrolls in Konoha. Madara had asked him that, in high hopes that they hadnt been already destroyed.

Of course, Sasuke would have to take it slow with Naruto. Naruto was never a traitor and Sasuke doubted Naruto would let it slip out, even to his ex raven friend.  
For this, he needed other tactics besides violence and being straightforward, both of which he wasnt eager to use on Naruto by any means for the time being.

_You're too late. Konoha's gone_

Sasuke suppressed his want to laugh out loud at this. Laugh a maniac laugh. Was Naruto really so foolish? And there he thought the blonde had matured. Was he so naive? Or was he just denying what he knew was merely true? Sasuke had gone all against Konoha and even if he hadnt been with the ones who assaulted it, he wouldnt bother shaking a finger to run to the village's need for help.

Naruto and everyone who knew Sasuke knew very well his hatred and bitterness for Konoha.  
Now him betraying Konoha which had betrayed his family and him in the first place was a completely different feeling than Naruto betraying him in the way he did by feeling that way about the whole matter.

He felt disgusted for a moment with the blonde and everyone who was of the same opinion with him: That Sasuke ought to help them out.

Really? What about him? Did ever anyone ask him in how much pain he'd been out of the very village ever since the first years of his painful life? No. Of course, not. All they cared for was just and only their own lives_, their own happiness, _their own well being. His _happiness_, his _well being_, they just didnt matter as long as he didnt betray ''saintly'' Konoha.

A disgusted expression tried to make its way up to his pale porcelain like face but he kept it back last minute, not wishing to become emotional in front of Naruto again. He had swore to himself he wouldnt fall for such weak sentimentalities again. And not with _him._

_E-everyone's dead._

Sasuke's eyes returned to the hokage's figure, his mind diving into past memories he never ceased fearing. Those words spitted up something in him, the memories of that night he came back home from his training only to find his family slaughtered by his own brother.

His whole clan slaughtered. And the main thoughts that were taking over his hurt childish mind at that cold night, at the moment of the harsh realization were these:  
Everyone's dead.

Oh how well he remembered how much it hurt. Just those words, those very words that were reproduced by his aching mind had spread the pain into his heart. And that pain never had left him, upon this very day. He'd be a hypocrite if he didnt admit that he could sympathize with Naruto now. That he could put himself into the dobe's shoes, even if this wasn't what he wanted to do. Even if the circumstances werent exactly the same, there were many similarities in them such as that Naruto had never gained conscious knowledge of his family ever since he started understanding the whole around him, so Konoha was his actual family.

He had grown up with it, despised and loved but in the end all those people were the only thing he could relate to in his lonely universe.

And Sasuke knew how it felt to lose your family. Far very well. And Naruto had come to learn about this, too. At those very thoughts, he couldnt help the whip of regret that agitated his heart for some seconds but he regained his cold composure, pushing back the tears that had reached his eyes before. He didnt need to be weak now. No, not in front of Naruto who had betrayed him too, in some sense. With Konoha having betrayed him and Naruto being its hokage, it was hard for Sasuke not to think of Naruto as a traitor in his eyes too. He had tried to suppress this thought in the past but it kept creeping up and now it was too late to control it.

_Am I... did I-i imagine it?' I wish... I wish I d-did._

Sasuke's eyes teared up again at those words. Oh how much did Naruto's reactions remind him of his own. Even if he longed for himself to be able and thrive into Naruto's misery, he couldnt. Instead he felt a hint of pain, and he cursed himself because he desired more than anything to eliminate such frivolities like feelings.  
But it seemed as with Naruto, it was impossible.

And it was the second time he had come to realize this. He did have a soft spot for the blonde, no matter how tough he tried to seem to everyone else.

Those words were his own thoughts, more or less, the immediate days that followed after his clan's assault, when he was dealing with his own nightmares and illusions, not really wanting to believe what had happened to him, what had happened to _them_.

His eyes softened up as he knelt down next to Naruto.  
He put a hesitant trembling hand on the blonde's shoulder and squished the spot weakly.

''I…'' he sighed, ''…I am sorry for your pain even if I am the main cause of it but I am sure you have already guessed that. I came here to tell you that you are under my guardianship. It's ok if you dont think you need a medic nin. I will order them to bring you to my room so I can take care of you, personally.''he whispered as he fought the intense desire to lean more onto the blonde and rest his tired head on his.

But he never did, he only waited for Naruto to look back into his eyes or snap at him and hit him. He didnt care at this point, his dominating thoughts were those of him trying to fight back the sporadic storms of regret that stang his heart at the sight that the blonde was presenting right now: broken and scared.

Bringing the blonde into his dorms would be a smart idea, as he'd be able to control him and get in the same time the information he needed to. He knew Naruto still had feelings for him, he could easily read him. It might be a slow process but he'd try to gain his trust again, even if it seemed impossible (even if justly so) at the moment.

* * *

R&R? Plox? Hahahaha =P

**Next chapter's preview: **

**Title:**_ Broken_

_''''Don't talk like that. That's not like you at all.'' He says, trying to mask the hurt that underlines his tired voice. And he succeeds, from his own point of view ,at least.''_


	14. Not So Simple

**Naruto's POV**

Naruto had never been good at confrontations. He was either overly passive or much too agressive. And maybe, that's why things had spiraled away from him so quicklyxx why he couldn't save the people he cared about. He hated himself for everything that had happened. Held a burning desire to be destructive, irresponsible, and sacraficial. He wanted nothing more than to have this misery ended for him, have everything slip away into nothing.

_''I dont care what you want. Obviously, you are not in charge here. And you will be taken care of, under my commands.''_ A whimper shook from his lips, prying Naruto to look at the towering figure with a sparse sense of recognition; like he was slowly degradinging into an empty vessel, and all his knowledge about those faces or Sasuke or Konoha were going with it. If only for a little while, he prayed. Cus' his heart is breaking, ripping at the seams. And Naruto doesn't know how much he can take. Can't even comprehend why he's still breathing, still bearing this weight.

_It's all my fault, Sasuke. I'm so sorry._ The hand on his shoulder was firm, and reassuring. It stung him like a tangible death, but relaxed him all the same. It was just one touch; though to Naruto, it had a thousand possibilities. The skin began to burn under Sasuke's hand, and not due to any physical wound. God, no. It was from all the things he'd sought from the other for decades, swelling up at once. Bubbling inside him, latching on to the last _real_ thing he could find in this chaotic end. Naruto grew still, unable to fathom much more in that moment. His lower lip quivered, but nothing was spoken. Slowly, the blond curled deeper inside of himself, even when the stitches anchored a warning of his stupidity.

... Why was Sasuke still here?

_''I…am sorry for your pain-''_ No your not, he wants to whisper. You'll never be. _''-even if I am the main cause of it, but I am sure you already guessed.''_ The fox roars with laughter; a deep, silent tone that shakes the very core of Naruto's sanity. Each word that dark angel speaks only proves his fading belief, that his understanding of Sasuke's persona haven't really changed. Haven't withered away, and left him in the dark. Blue eyes droop to the cell's floor, pondering how much groveling it'd take to have one of the guardsmen kill him. Or, more subtly put, 'discover him'. He thought how easy it'd be to convince someone, even if he had to grovel. Cus' heaven knows he's tired, and how much it hurts to stay awake. _''I came here to tell you that you are under my guardianship. It's okay if you don't think you need a medic nin. I will order them to bring you to my room so I can take care of you, personally...''_

What..?  
The boy shifted, his shoulders rolling with the choked sob he bottled inside himself. Naruto didn't want to be saved. Didn't want to be watched over. He wanted to be _dead_. With his village.

How couldn't Sasuke understand that..?

Blue eyes reign in a new tone as they admire the black, a type of desparity that could say more than the Hokage himself ever wanted.

''**W-why...**'' Is this suppose to be the end, or another meaningless beginning? Naruto tried to understand, but found it incomprehensible. Like he was only seeing half of the picture, and the other portion was fogged. Torn off, or burnt away. He had his doubts about Sasukexx which was surprising, considering Naruto use to trust his life in the other's hands. Hell, he'd offered to give everything to him once. Loyalty had never been a problem before now. Then again, Naruto felt his structure quake under the very memory of his raven, and knew that no matter what... he'd be useless. His faith was gone, leaving little ground for him to lean on.

''**Your guardianship,**'' he quietly parroted. He repeats it a second time, much more soft. Naruto's testing it, letting the sounds roll over his toungue. It's like he's never heard of such things before, or doesn't want to. Which, judging by the desperate look on his face, the latter is true. I mean, why would Sasuke want to do this? Waste time on a creature so broken he barely called himself_alive_? The boy huddled inward, trying to pretend he didn't feel that flood of calm pulsing through his veins where Sasuke's hand rested anymore. No, no. Instead, he tried to act like it pained him, scorched his skin.

He didn't deserve this.  
Didn't deserve to have someone apologize, or care about his wounds.  
And Sasuke didn't deserve to have to deal with it.

There were people out therexx half dead or otherwise xx who needed this more than him. Who hadn't even commited the most hideous of acts; letting down the people they watched over. Of letting their home burn to the ground. His stomach lurches, and for a moment, Naruto held a fear for something new; throwing up. His chin tucked down into his arm, nuzzling the dirty skin as if it might keep him from losing what little content he had in his stomach. That was another thing about Naruto. He could never stay focused on something for very long. His head could run circles and circles all day, but he knew nothing would get accomplished. Because in the end, he'd only have his thoughts. And all those people were still gonna be dead. The guards still wouldn't want to kill him. And he'd have that an unreputable urge to be dead.

His back is against the wall because of it, he knows he's got no place left to go. Naruto'd been teetering on the edge of everything he'd ever believed in for a while now, and knew his feet were slipping. He counted all the dreams that never came true, all the aspirations he'd had when they were kids. He had nothing to keep him from falling anymore, nothing to keep him safe. God, Naruto's really gonna fall! Gonna crumble to pieces; smash before he hits the ground. Blue eyes are searching again, looking for the reassurance that this is a mistake. That he's not a monster, and has a way out still.

But Sasuke's just looking back at him. Unphased, or unknowing. Naruto could never ask that soundless question, or ponder aloud his significance to the world. Because to be blunt, he's not suppose to be alive.

_I didn't mean it, I'm so sorry. Please, Konoha.._

Still, as the moments slip away, Naruto finds that he's just staring and staring, almost drowning in those dark eyes. He'd never been able to keep his thoughts very straight when it came to him, so it was no surprise that while he trembled, he neglected to offer an explanation for the staring. Those black eyes were endless to him, and oh-so tormenting.

Naruto despised the things that'd been kept between them, forging a barrier that fitted to their bodies. It pulled at them, making polar opposites even though Naruto would've loved to have it differently. Yet, he knew he'd never done much to fix the problem either. Never would. The ex-hokage had ignored his friend for years. Shoot. He probably betrayed him on more than one account, too.

He's to blame for everything here. But that didn't stop him from worrying, or sweeping his gaze along the hand still connected to his shoulder. The blond knows he could've done so much to find his Uchiha.. to patch up the gaping hole torn in their friendship. But Sasuke seemed like a faraway image to him.. like a dark inkling he could never touch.

_Why couldn't I work this out?_ Naruto knows he'll never reciprocate anything expressed to him now. That even if he wanted to, he had very little left to give. To be honest, the blond had nothing. Just a shriveled little heart that was shrinking by the second. He couldn't show Sasuke how much it meant seeing him alive like this, even though this impass was meant to be a mock gesture. It would be pointless to try. He won't show Sasuke that he still worried about him, or that he was glad to see him strong. It was a dark numbness that had consumed him, crippling the blond with it's silence.

Then again, Naruto has lost Sasuke too often to afford another hit like this, or walk around smiling and acting fulfilled after being discarded again.

Regardless, the ex-Hokage knows he'll never stop waiting on him, holding his breath. He'll always remember the days they were apart and how many times he'd looked around for him in the streets. Before war was declared, Naruto can even account how often he'd thought of the male, debating on how he might've reacted to certain situations if he were home; safe. He didn't care about the traitorous acts the other committed, about the undeniable pain he afflicted to everyone around him.

And that's what made it a genuine problem for Naruto, knowing he couldn't get over this avenger. Anyone who understood a fraction about anything involving the ex-Hokage would also know this. Jeez, he'd tried everything. But he knew nothing would work. Cus' Sasuke was the only person who ever stayed right beside him, and didn't have a real reason.

Naruto's attention shifts, drawing to his own hand as it clung tightly to the scarred arm resting against his knees. ''**You know,**'' he whispers, ''**I wish I were dead.**'' the words are spoken like a secret to his limbs. Like a breathy promise, or a calculating fact.

And it was true.

Cus' Naruto wanted to trade his life for theirs. Was searching for any idea that might invoke a swift assembly of all those souls... of all those people. The kyuubi had to be worth more than a couple hundred. Right? It had to be. And Naruto would do this all willingly. He'd die smiling, even.

It was all his fault. He just wanted to fix it.

''**You...**'' he's struggling suddenly, unsure of how to speak. His eyes are watering, and the boy feels so tired. So, so tired. But he's pushing himself, urging this to be spoken. The words are bitter and taste ashy in his mouth, cursing Naruto to bite down on his lower lip hard enough it stains pink. ''**I-i... go away,**_**Sasuke**_**.**'' That name. That name! Naruto speaks it with so much more care than anything else, afraid Sasuke'll actually listen, and leave. ''**God, please..**''

He's breaking down.

The blond is sniffling, whimpering, trembling, sobbing. Everything he'd held in is errupting out in small slips, jerking him forward. Within moments the blond can't find enough sense to tell a person which way is up, or which way is down. Those faces are sliding over his vision, nudging him with their indefinite words and stony afflictions. He's twisting now, gripping at his head wishing it'd all just stop.

''**Please, Sasuke...**''

He doesn't know what he's asking for, but the blond expects the other to know. Just understand him. He fears Sasuke'll really turn away, or smash him against the window. Do _anything_, really.

It's why he decides to move from under the hand, and bury his face against the wall. Why he tries to dismiss Sasuke's presence entirely, when all he could ever need was for him to stay.

''**J-just...**''

**Sasuke's POV**

Sasuke watched in hidden anticipation as the blonde looked back into his eyes, boring his cerulean ones into the onyx maze.  
His face was apathetic as usual, after all those years of him showing no emotion, you'd think that mask of coldness was glued to him and couldn't fall even if his inner world was to be shattering.

He didnt say anything, he just watched, watched and read the many feelings he could absorb in the blonde's eyes, as he was getting lost in them. Memories from the past flooded him, a familiar feeling of the blonde surrounding him, bringing back those days where he had the freedom of looking at his friend, without feeling guilty for every path and trail of pain he had marked on his heart.

He felt his heart trembling as the emotions on Naruto's eyes scared him. The blonde seemed so desperate, so lifeless, but most of all hopeless. The great optimistic Naruto that never gave up, that never forgot his smile and his loud idiotic mannerisms had now lost his hopes. It was so easy to read and someone could even guess it just by the blonde's general body stance.

The regrets in Sasuke got higher, as he unintentionally made a comparison. Naruto had suffered all his life so far because he wasnt seflish. He always cared for others more than for himself and was willing to sacrifice his skin for the big image. Sasuke was exactly the opposite. Always self centered, uncaring, going only after his own goals and using everyone on his way to achieve them.

The only person he couldnt find the power in him to use was Naruto. He never realized why. But when that moment came ,years ago, to kill the blonde to obtain that new power, he couodnt do it. He excused himself with things like this would be what Itachi would want me to do and so on. Bottom line was that he never found the guts to face Naruto just like everyone else. And he never really had devoted the time to understand what he really felt for the blonde. Some time ago, he thought it was care, until they separated again and his world crumbled again on pieces.

He had swore he would revenge Konoha for taking away his blonde and he had done it, with Madara's help. But why wasnt he feeling better? Wasnt he supposed to be satisfied now? _Revenge will only bring you pain._That is what he had been told countless times by Kakashi, by his ex teamates, by everyone who was wise enough to warn him. By everyone who wasnt like him…

And right now, by looking into Naruto' eyes, pain was what he was feeling. By seeing the blonde so sad, so broken, nothing of the old cheery Naruto he used to know,…the one he used to secretly want to be in the same place with just to hear his loud voice and stare into his bright cerulean eyes like he was lost in a dream that took him out of his harsh reality for some moments.

But now he couldnt feel the same anymore, looking in those eyes. Cause he was feeling pain, harsher, tougher, more threatening than the pain he felt when he was alone. Right now he was in pain, cause Naruto was. He would have never thought he connected so deeply to the blonde until now. Was it that he thought that the blonde was made out of rock and strong enough to not be broken by anything and anyone in their known world? Now it seemed like this was what he had been thinking. But oh surprise Naruto was human too and Sasuke didnt know if he had the nerve to deal with the blonde's weak side. Cause it was hurting him. Hurting him to see him so broken.

He feels the blonde shivering under his hand. Is it maybe that he is in pain? A hint of worry crashes through his gaze for a while, like a falling star that lights the night sky with a brief route before the sky turns to dark again.  
But of course he is in pain. How dumb of him to wonder something like this. The man is wounded and beaten to death. How could he not be in pain?  
His mind snaps out of his dark thoughts when he hears Naruto mumbling.

_Why?_

His eyes take in a surprised note before becoming apathetic again. Why…Did he really know why himself? He could give less of a damn to help Madara for all he knew, yet why is he submitting under his commands? He doesn't really care for the forbidden scrolls himself, he has no one to avenge or revenge anymore, more power is useless to him right now. As is his monotonous, empty life. Is he perhaps trying to find a reason to keep on living? Really, Sasuke,… why?

_'I wish I were dead__  
_

Sasuke doesn't have time to think more about it. Naruto's next words catch him by surprise. So he really is as broken as he seems. Sasuke's eyes pierce through Naruto's more intensely now, trying to find anything the blonde could hang on from, to find the hope in him, the hope he doesn't want to admit that the blond may have lost…out of the raven.

Knowing Naruto, he probably is more concerned for the other patients and wounded than himself right now. And Sasuke being always the selfish one found himself being agitated by this , since he wanted Naruto to be fine and not sacrifise himself for people Sasuke didnt even care for. Why was he doing this? Did he really hate being close to him that much?

Sasuke sighed, but it was a low sigh, almost barely noticed. His hand on Naruto's shoulder, still, squishing a bit tighter, just a slightly bit, as if he is trying to find comfort on his own desperation. Seeing Naruto so desperate makes him lose hope too. Hope for something he cant specify.  
It seems as if when with Naruto, the blonde's feelings are contagious. And he hates this, for some reason.

''Don't talk like that. That's not like you at all.'' He says, trying to mask the hurt that underlines his tired voice. And he succeeds, from his own point of view ,at least.

He wonders how the blonde can still deal with him so calmly when he is the reason Konoha is in shreds right now. Ok, partially. But still. He has betrayed Naruto along with Konoha. And he realizes it now. But he was blind by his hatred and passion for the blonde. Passion? Does this mean he loved him? He frowns , pinching the arc of his nose for some seconds, in frustration out of his own confusing thoughts.  
He has Naruto's desperation to deal with now. It s not the best time to analyze his feelings.

''I won't let you die, okay?''he says softly as he leans in closer. It is more of as a statement to himself, than to Naruto. Because he shivered inside him. Something about losing Naruto again agitated him terribly and Naruto's words are scaring him, hurting his selfish heart.  
_  
__I-i... go away, Sasuke._

Sasuke looks at the blonde in numb pain. He knew that moment would come sooner or later. For all of his doubtful feelings, his insecurities. They flood him in right now, fill his empty vessel of a body and make him uneasy.

He feels so uncertain for Naruto's feelings anymore. It would be only normal for Naruto to hate him after everything he has done yet knowing the blonde he thought this was not as possible. But now that certainty of him, just in those three words, is crumbling and falling down in pieces on the bottoms of his heart and soul. _He is afraid._ He keeps his gaze stable on Naruto, his facial characteristics relaxing slowly in realization. He is examining the blonde's face.

Anywhere but his eyes because he cant control the hurt in his gaze anymore and he doesnt want the blonde to see. He is looking down now... No, he doesn't want to go. He feels like he belongs by the blonde's side _right now._ A feeling he cant really explain but he couldnt imagine himself else where. And being away from him for so long, he feels that he doesn't want to lose a thing anymore of his friend's reactions.

_Please, Sasuke..._

Sasuke's glance unwillingly shifts back to the blonde's face. But instead of a pained expression, he finds a totally broken one. Broken to every bit of him. What can happen in a few seconds...He feels his heart in great discomfort at that. And that discomfort rises when he notices the blonde shifting out of his grip, and placing his hands on his head, turning to the wall.  
It is the image of a total break down. He can hear the blonde's sobs and at every sob he feels his heart heavier with regret. The burden feels gigantic.

He doesn't know what he is doing and why, until the words escape his lipsm before he has the time to control his feelings.  
''I…I can't leave you.''he admits. He keeps silent for a bit. Theh, hesitant and with a sigh he leans in closer to the crying blonde.

''I am sorry.''he whispers unsure. After a moment of prolonged hesitation, he wraps his arms around the folded figure and closes the blonde in a comforting hug.

He expects the blonde to push him away but he doesn't care because all this sight is too much for the raven to bear and him standing so apathetic in his friend's pain is something he cant do, even if he wishes with all his heart that he could.  
He tightens the grip around the blonde only slightly, careful not to hurt the already wounded friend.

He blinks a bit and leans his head slowly and carefully over Naruto's ear, as with affection.

''You didnt deserve all this. I am such a b*****d.''he says and as much as he wants, he couldnt control the regrets that underline his tone.  
His heart is racing faster now, both in anticipation and due to the proximity of the two men.

Even under all the blood and wounds, Sasuke can still sniff the blonde's familiar smell. This is one thing that hadnt changed about him and he is able to find a strange comfort in it.

''You…must really hate me anymore? Don't…dont you?'' he whispers in a hesitant ''afraid'' question, even if his heart is semi prepared to receive a confirmation of his fears out of the blonde's mouth.  
He closes his eyes tightly and just holds the blonde for some moments in silence, resting his head softly on top of his.

(Time skip)

Sasuke had ordered some soldiers to take the hokage and place him in his private rooms. Madara knew it and appeared to be fine with it, not like he had a word on it. Before the alliance, one of the rules was that the hokage would be left to Sasuke and only, no matter what and no one else would have a right to lay a hand on him for good or bad without his permission.

So they really didnt have any choice than to accept this term and go by it. Sasuke knew Madara might want to do his twisted plans about the moon on Naruto sometime in the future, since the blonde still contained the kyubi in him but Sasuke wouldnt allow anyone to harm the blonde and Madara wasnt as strong as he'd need in order to battle the Uchiha for dominance, at the moment.

So for the time being, Naruto was safe. But he would have to take him somewhere else in the future as this couldnt drag out for long before Madara's patience wore out. Madara wasnt a fool but when his patience dragged short, he could become one. Sasuke knew him far too well by now.

He had left in a rush from Naruto's cell, as he was very emotionally agitated last night that he went to see him. Now he was calmer but he hadnt stepped in his room during this morning, he had devoted most of it in training, partially because he still felt akward to face Naruto after what happened in the cell.  
He fastened his pace as he made for his chambers, tired from the exhaustive practice. He had put all his focus and powers in it, so that he could get his mind out of Naruto's broken image that still haunted his memories in a torturing way.

Finally, he was standing out of the room. He had ordered some ninjas to get him stitches, bandages , clean water and medicine. In short, all that he'd need to take care of Naruto's external wounds. As for the internal, he had no idea how to deal with them and this terrorized him.  
The healing tools ought to have been there by the early morning, thus the time they brought Naruto in the room.

He put a shaking hand on the door and opened it slowly, peering in.  
His glance first fell on the objects he had requested, being the first to encounter in the room as he slowly stepped in. All placed on a small table, they made the room remind him of some hospital. He had to do the same thing before for himself, ever since he had been left without medic nins in his team, so he had learnt some things well when it came to healing wounds and taking care of them.

He came to a halt, when he caught a glimpse of blonde hair with the corner of his eyes.  
He unwillingly took a deep breath, as he turned his face to the right, to take the full view of Naruto in.  
The blonde was placed at the center of his bedroom. A chain was extending from his right ankle and it resulted in the pole that supported the ceiling.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow at this. Did they really think he was in a position to be a threat in all the mess he was in? He looked at Naruto kindly and calm, but insisde him he was struggling to keep up this cold facade.  
He shrugged the akwardness off and made a few steps towards the blonde.

''Good morning, Naruto.''he said softly.

**Naruto's POV**

Everyone knew the Hokage was perfect. And as the last head of Konoha, Naruto conformed to such ideals with little more than a shrug. His life was perfect. His clothes were perfect. Each article had been ironed, matched accordingly, and worn at certain times. His _smile_ was even perfect. And although it was a complete lie, he worked his butt off to keep up the appearance that he had it all. The truth, if it were to come out, would destroy his entire picture-perfect image.

He'd stood in front of his people and pretended he could wipe away their hatred and worries with a wave of the hand. That as long as he was in power, that crooked line of horror on the horizon would eventually fade. His hands would shake, and Naruto would tuck them behind his back; as if a man born of regal grace. God, he could remember the lay of everything in Konoha. From the way the sun set on some of the tallest buildings at exactly six o'clock to the way his people clustered at the speeches. Everything was so simple, so peaceful. Naruto had been drunk with his assessments of the place, admiring the smiling faces and giving them praise. Inside, there was nothing but persistence and worry. He'd told himself that this was what he wanted, that this was what the village needed.

Only now did he realize that being Hokage was nothing more than a title.. a caretaker, who carried out fruitless orders and maintained Konoha's balance. But of course, he'd also been disastrous from the start. First, he sucked at paperwork. Then he had his 'slight occurrence' with Sasuke, shaking his devotion.

And to be honest, he knew that he'd been ruined in the days following it. Because whatever Sasuke had done to him, had left all the faces he use to see as a smudged, broken image. Like he was missing more than just their essence, or maybe a part of his own heart.

Whatever the case, it crippled him, and Naruto hadn't been sure where to turn. Now, he'd led everyone to their deaths. He'd failed his village's children. Every. Single. One. They'd been so innocent and bright. And their blood is on his hands, killing Naruto with the burden.

_''I…I can't leave you.''_ He grows rigid. The fox inside snides some type of reply, while Naruto himself gets lost in the swirl of faces only he can see. Faintly, he recognizes the words that Sasuke is telling him, but hold's back. Because as far as he knows, this has all been an illusion.

That he's bleeding out on the floor right now, and the hand that's keeping a gentle hold of his shoulder, isn't really there. That Sasuke Uchiha might not really be with him anymore.. and he never will be. Why should he? Naruto is nothing now. Scum. He closes his eyes tight, trying to fight back the lurch in his stomach with a fit of sobs.

''**Forget me.**'' he whispers. It's the best advice he'll be able to give to Sasuke. Let alone, the best thing he could do for his avenger. Because Naruto's falling apart, with no hope of keeping himself together. It shouldn't be Sasuke's responsibility, let alone hindrance to watch him break down. He just wants Sasuke to be strong, to get everything he wanted in life. Cus' heaven knows that even in his state, he'd follow the Uchiha's every whim.

''_I am sorry.''_

He isn't sure what Sasuke has to be sorry for, but he accepts it all the same. Doesn't even find the mind to respond, just breathes deep. He's blinking, his chest heaving with the weight of his sobs. He wants to tell Sasuke that he shouldn't be sorry, that whatever he's taking blame for resides on Naruto alone. But the fox keeps him from speaking, grumbling words of torment against deaf ears.

''**Pl...please...**'' When he feels the warmth of Sasuke's breath brush against his ear, Naruto barely has a grasp on reality.

Slowly, he's folding into the arms that circle him. And all the while, he's unraveling fingers from his hair to cling to said avenger; as if it'll make everything stop spinning, or do anything to make the faces slow down. He's in agony here, wishing more than ever that he could take their place.. that he could revive his home and get a do over. Naruto's clinging to Sasuke's shirt, making sure the other won't let leave.

He's almost frantic to keep hold of Sasuke's presence, to know that whatever he's feeling is real. Naruto buries his face against Sasuke, acknowledging the masculine plains of the other's chest and the cold aura that ripples off of him. The blond is still sobbing, but it's dying down some with Sasuke's unspoken assurance.

_''You didn't deserve all this. I am such a b*****d.''_ And all at once, words are erupting from those soft lips. Nothing that would make sense, just the things Naruto had been bottling up for so long now. All the things he's seen, destroyed, smelled... it's all being mumbled out to Sasuke, as if it'll magically fix things.

He doesn't even know what he's saying altogether himself, just jabbers on. As time progresses, Naruto's voice is getting softer, more mumbled. ''**No.**'' it's the first solid idea he can settle on. Startling himself, the ex-Hokage rubs at his eye, trying to keep more tears from falling. His voice is ragged, like gravel beneath a churning tire.

''**I-i deserve wo**xx'' he couldn't say it. He just couldn't.

Because he knows what he should've done all those years ago, but was too chicken to admit such things aloud. He's choking on his sorrow, understanding just how badly he's failed Konoha. And Sasuke. Then again, he's messed up with Sasuke too many times to count. Can he really afford to take this path again? No, he thinks. He can't. He just wants this all to end, so he can be with his people.

''**W-why didn't I burn?**'' he asks, peering up at the raven. He's wary, still unsure of the image surrounding him. Sasuke's like a drug, he thinks. A narcotic that flows straight into the heart, and leaves him jumpy for days.

''**Why...?**''

xxxxtimeskip:::;

Throughout the night, something sharp nudges at his back. And his ribs. And his whole body. Each bit of skin is searing with some form of ache, reminding him of his weaknesses. Without warning, light shifts into his cell, blinding him with it's purity. Memories of Sasuke are the only thing to keep him from crying out in pain. He's going to be quiet... pretend he's still sane enough to try, at least. He's not going to let the faces control whether he lives or dies here. He's in charge of his own destiny, not his failures.

... which is totally different to say he doesn't think he wants to.

He has no idea how much time has gone by. A half hour? Four? His body is weakening. He's having trouble breathing. He smells smoke. Naruto wonders vaguely if they're going to push him into a fire? The light is still penetrating his cell, but it doesn't matter because Naruto's sure his eyes are swollen shut from so much crying.

He feels like caving and falling to the ground but he forces himself up, to slouch against the dank wall. He ponders how unrecognizable he must be now, hot blood steaming from gashes in his body and a bruise swelling along his jaw. He can feel his stitches tugging open and it's all falling off in pieces, exposing the scars where history branded him.

He slumps back to the ground, his face scraping against the brick.

At this point, he's not sure he can make it another day with his sanity. _Breathe breathe breathe._ As long as he repeats the mantra in his head, Naruto prays he can make it just another hour. _Breathe. Breathe. Breathe._

Is the smell of smoke real, or is it the smell of death?

Through the thick haze in his mind Naruto thinks he can hear someone saying, ''**Do we have to do this?**''

He hears a distant but distinct ''**Yes.**'' Protests follow. If he could move toward them, he would. Cus' in all the time that he's been here, he's never heard any of the soldiers disagree with an order. _Breathe breathe breathe._ More protests. Is this even allowed? What's happening? What's next? Questions circle in Naruto's mind. Whatever this is it must be worse than war, because he hears a lot of arguing.

''**Hold him facedown,**'' a voice rings out. ''**Drag him, carry him, or walk him. I don't care what you do, just don't ******** him up anymore than he already is.**'' The burning smell get's closer. He has no clue what's about to happen but he thinks he's going to throw up. A set of hands are slowly wrapping around his forearms, lifting him upward in a mock stance.

He thinks he groaned. Or growled. Or screamed. He doesn't really know anymore. Doesn't know anything anymore. He can't think. All he can do is _feel_. They might as well have thrown him into a fire, because to him, this was a torture worse than anything he could have imagined. The smell of burning skin sears his nostrils as he realizes the flames aren't real at all. The smell is nothing more than a memory, refreshing his head with it's torment.

_Stop stop STOP!_

Two people are flanking his side, carefully guiding him through the corridors toward another room. Naruto's blue eyes were flickering all over the place, looking dully for a sanctuary that wouldn't lead him back to his fellow captors, and the slow decomposition they've been rendered to.

When the soldiers stop, he rolls his head to the left. They set him unceremoniously onto the ground, for which he releases a short yelp. Both soldiers whirl back to give him a once over, then move on to setting items on a table. Carefully, he recognizes them as medical tools. And for an instant, he's scared. Frightened. Of what these men plan to do to him.

He considers the threat of being held down, and allows the kyuubi to snarl. Long blond locks are brushing against his bruised cheek, but he doesn't pay it mind. Just keeps blue eyes on those tools, and the soldiers. He waits for them to make a move, anticipating the worst.

And when they do?

He cowers away, drawing back a few inches as the first soldier kneels down, studying him intently. The man says something, then clinks metal onto his leg. Naruto doesn't bother listening. He doesn't even look down at the anklet. When they leave, he holds himself up straighter, finally giving in to the curiosity about his surroundings. Hours slip, cascading into an endless stream. All Naruto can infer is that the room is white, and that he's stuck here. Possibly forever.

_Breathe breathe breathe._

Jerking his attention to the door as it creeks open, Naruto feels his heart hammer unconditionally at the image before him.

_Sasuke._

He bites down on his lower lip, catching the same feeling about Sasuke's new appearance as before. I mean, sure. He seemed older. But there was something else about him too. Something colder. More hardened.

_''Good morning, Naruto.''_ he said softly.

Naruto loses himself in the sound of that voice, then tilts his head down. Sasuke shouldn't be seeing himself like this, he thinks. Not like he can control it, though. So when he finally manages to look back up, the blond begins to notice how tired Sasuke seems, and immediately glances back to the medical supplies. The question runs wordlessly at first, before the boy finally manages to scan what little of Sasuke's bare skin he can see, inwardly reconciling that he might've been hurt.

Why should that matter? It's not like Sasuke didn't leave him last night. Naruto already hates himself for caving so easily to the grief that awaited him within the confines of his teammate's expression, but knows he can't rely on his strengths to keep himself from ever breaking down again, either. The smell of flame swirls around him once more, an imaginary stench that fills the pit of his stomach, making Naruto woozy.

''**Are you...**'' he pauses, raking his head for the proper words. ''**I-injured?**'' Out of habit, Naruto folds his hands into his lap, careful and all too formal. He's watching the Uchiha, not sure what to think of their second meeting. Let alone, of the medical tools.

* * *

Next chapter previewww: _''Naruto,…I am sorry but I have to do this.''_

_Muhahaha, we all hate cliffiees and short previewwws!_


	15. Healing Him

**Healing Him**

**Sasuke's POV **

Sasuke looked at Naruto, souless. But only superficially. He couldnt tell him how much he had missed him. He couldnt just walk in on and be like nothing had changed, nothing happened. Cause it had.

So many things were now standing between them ,separating them like galaxian miles, even if the meters that kept them afar physically couldnt count for more than two.

Shrugging at the care and tenderness the blond's simple question was hiding within, he avoided to look into the worried cerulean eyes, still not understanding that even in his aweful condition, his old friend could find the strength to put others over him all the time.

Sighing softly, he dwelled in secret bitterness in the knowledge of the fact that he would never be like Naruto. No, his heart was destined to have room only for a few people. His family, Itachi and maybe…maybe Naruto?

But no matter whom he loved in his life, who loved him, who he could overpower and who was stilll better than him, he knew that his heart's power would always seem like a tiny metal empty vessel next to Naruto's big one.

And for some reason, this irked him. He vaguely wondered from time to time, if he would be more open to have feelings for people, more open to positive relationships and caring if he hadnt experienced that terrible night when his brother murdered his clan, his family.

Who would he be now if the massacre has never occured? To add to the bitterness, all reasonable thoughts led him to believe that things would surely be a lot better.

Snapping back to reality and focusing on the person sitting on the floor in front of him, broken and weak as it was, his onyx eyes took an unreadable expression as he countered with a reply.

''They aren't for me.'' He said coldly nodding to the tools with his head.

''I said I would take care of your wounds myself, did you forget already, Naruto?'' he added more softly, emphasizing on his name.

Making some slow but confident steps, he covered most of the distance separating them and kneeled down in front of Naruto, his eyes pinned on the small table.

Placing a hand carelessly on the tools, he examined some of them, his brows furrowing together for some seconds, as he touched the tip of the metal with his index finger to make sure it was ideal for the operation.

Closing his eyes for some second, to take strength in what he was going to do, he let out a soft but deep breath.

He had only done the same thing to himself before. He hadnt risked with anyone else's life using his beginner level medic skills.

But Naruto wouldnt let anyone else heal him and Sasuke had to hope he, as the raven haired man he once considered a friend, had more chances to soften up the blond's resistance. After all, he would never accept to let him die and he was willing to risk harming him worse than stand still and watch as his friend passed away.

Clenching his free fist, he slowly turned his head to face Naruto. Onyx eyes boring into cerulean ones, he examined the blue pools for some moments, as if he was trying to hypnotize the blond so as in to feel not pain at all if possible.

But he knew he didnt have such a skill, as some of the high lvl medic nins had, nor did he have any substance to give to the patient to ease his pain.

He had asked Madara persistently for something similar, but the man had denied, saying such stuff was expensive to buy and he wasn't in the mood to waste his precious supplies on an enemy.

His gaze softened up, as he felt himself getting lost in those eyes, who betrayed so much sentiment out. Was this really one of the reasons he liked Naruto?

The contrast between the two men was so obvious. Sasuke was an emotional iceberg-even if solely superficially- and Naruto was the ever hot headed unable to control his feelings one.

And strangely, Sasuke rejoiced in that feature of his old friend. Cause it felt refreshing being with someone who wasnt like him. With Someone who was different…and who could give him what he couldnt give himself…Feelings.

''Naruto…forgive me but I have to do this…''he said after he activated his sharingan so as to eye the wounds better.

Placing a stable hand on Naruto's naked shoulder, he pressed softly , his eyes never straying away from Naruto's.

Silently performing a paralyzing jutsu he had learnt by Orochimaru years ago, his chakra passed from his hand through Naruto's skin and spread to all his body parts, paralyzing them all in a fast pace.

Of course, Naruto could still talk or understand what would happen around him, but Sasuke had to do this so that he didnt have any risk of Naruto moving around fierecely and thus causing Sasuke to hurt him accidentaly with the sharp tools.

If only Madara's useless medic nins could do that things would be a lot easier but somehow he wondered if the real reason he had chosen to heal Naruto himself was just that the blond wouldnt let anyone else.

Nodding to Naruto to relax him, he massaged softly his arm, whispering soothing words.

''Don't worry, I will be done fast.

Removing his hand from Naruto he focused his gaze back on the tools, thinking slightly before choosing which ones he would need for this case.

After some thought, he took a piece of clean but thick tissue and plunged it into a small bucket with warm water.

Taking a steady hold of the small towel, he started running it slowly over Naruto's body.

Ripping his semi torn shirt out of the way, he rid Naruto from it with one hand slowly, as he kept cleaning the blood out of his wounds and skin with the tissue, trying to cause as less pain as possible to the already hurting body.

His eyes ever avoiding Naruto's as for some reason he felt akward in the very situation, he examined Naruto's bare chest that seemed manly and weak in the same time.

The fight really had taken a bad toll on him. Wincing in sadness internally, he plunged the tissue in the water once more to clean it from the blood.

Taking out after some seconds, he started caressing Naruto's arms with it, droplets of warm water marking brief but slow routes down the tanned skin.

Shifting closer to reach more places, he looked shortly at Naruto's eyes, hesitating if he should go on with the cleaning. It seemed as if he had to reach to the blond's thighs, cause he had wounds even there but he didnt know if he was able to handle it professionally.

Instead, he pushed the disturbing thought away, and shifted even closer afer a brief wait, pulling the paralyzed Naruto softly against his chest.

Placing his head on the blond's shoulder, he used one hand to press the man on him and with the other he took on running the wet towel up and down the kitsune's bare back spine, cleaning it of the dried blood and soothing his wounds. Gladly, his back didnt seem to have received the worst damage. So far it seemed as if his frontal had been the one to receive the biggest wound infliction.

Feeling Naruto trembling in his embrace, he whispered smoothly.

'' It's okay. I am almost done.'' His voice came off as a husky whisper, though his own uncertainty and hesitation were gracing his tone.

Examining the man's back once more, over his shoulder, he made sure that he had cleaned all the wounds before pulling away softly and letting Naruto carefully lean his back against the pole.

Now begins the hard part, he thought anxiously, as his gaze avoided Naruto's once more, searching for the table with the medic tools.

''I will try to hurt you as less as possible. But I want you to be patient. Okay?'' he asked in a low tone, looking into Naruto's eyes unsure for some moments, as his hand had made already its way to grab a thin but kind of long needle from the vase with the tools.

**Naruto's POV**

Naruto was used to people watching him. Sometimes watching out for him, taking care of him, but mostly, they just watched him. They had done it since he was a kid, albeit it had never really bothered him. Even when Naruto started growing up and realized that so much about his life was just not normal, society's ever-present gaze rested on him like a hard weight. He'd never questioned it. It was just there. Then Naruto became Hokage. He had fought tooth and nail for so many years, though when he finally reached his goal, nothing felt right about it

.And he knew why. It was because of [i]him[/i]. Nothing would ever seem right without the one he'd lost, the one he couldn't get back. His dark image had followed him— haunted Naruto in his dreams. And no amount of staring or actions could free him of it

.

_ Breathe breathe breathe…_

Maybe Naruto had died a little inside, knowing he couldn't bury his own friends properly. Knowing that they had been thrown into the ditch someplace. Or a river. Maybe Naruto died a little inside when he'd been pushing to be so perfect all these years— to make up for all the things he lacked —and realized it still hadn't been enough for Konoha.

For Sasuke to come home, and stop being a dream. They'd needed something better, deserved something better, but Naruto knew it wasn't possible. It would never be possible.

Little pieces of Naruto seemed to have died every day, with every move, every move that was performed without Sasuke by his side. Big pieces of Naruto had died when he saw things that reminded him of Sasuke— the training grounds; the Uchiha compound; someone who frowned like Sasuke, deep and serious, and Naruto would wonder if Sasuke was really ever gone at all.

Naruto pulled consciously at the shred's of his shirt, a bit that was sopping up the red. He didn't want to understand the circumstances of what'd been happening anymore; not when Sasuke was with him for real.

_''Hmmpff…they aren't for me_.''the blond blinked, glancing nervously to the medical instruments. _''I said I would take care of your wounds myself, did you forget already, Naruto?'_' It was hard for him to swallow, especially when Sasuke said his name in a way that made the world seem to stop on it's tilt.

_ Naruto._

He'd spoken so softly, so melodic... it bordered on something else entirely. Naruto's head snapped upward when his name was spoken, his expression blank.

''y-yea, I did.'' he answers quietly. Because truthfully, Naruto had forgotten all about being healed the moment Sasuke promised. Mostly because he still didn't want to be. For an instant, he was tempted to scream this at Sasuke, but the Avenger was moving, crossing the invisible lines that would've had him scurrying back if it were anybody else.

Anybody but Sasuke, who had haunted him so many times it didn't even matter anymore.. because the longer he was around, the longer Naruto thought he might hold on to the scraps of his sanity. He bit down into his cheek, tugging more absently at his shirt as Sasuke knelt down, staring at him.

_''Naruto…I am sorry but I have to do this…''_

Naruto looked at Sasuke for a moment, his face anxious and shifting. What caught him, however, were those eyes. Those eyes... those eyes! He'd been dreaming in their web, and now, he was tangled. He'd known the moment they bled red, churning from his precious black to a dark ruby.

Naruto has no words. Instead he just swallows convulsively, once, again, and turns frightened eyes to everything near Sasuke, whose face is inches from his. He wants Sasuke to not be so close. He wants Sasuke to take it all back. He wants his best friend to make everything better again, and that's probably the most screwed up thing here.

"Sasuke, '' he says. It's all he can say, and he knows that there's fear in his voice that makes him sound much, much younger. Sasuke's hard-lined, familiar face with his red glare and shadowed jaw remains frozen, and the hand on Naruto's shoulder starts to make him go slack. Naruto isn't sure how to resist, so he ends up paralyzed under that seeping gaze.

_''Don't worry, I will be done fast.'' _

" Wait.''

His voice was trembling and timid. He was scared. So scared. Didn't want to be patched up from this madness. Sasuke's touch felt cool against his skin and Naruto wasn't sure for a moment if Sasuke was even there. It was taking over so quickly. The lack of control that drew his consciousness to a high, and had him studying Sasuke's movements. He let out a hiss as wet cloth brushed over his injuries, cleaning them of the blood and grime.

Naruto feels his teeth grit together, though his lips remain parted. He's looking helplessly at Sasuke, thinking that this will never end.

'' It's okay. I am almost done.''

He is shaking, quivering. Everything hurts, and Naruto's scared to even breathe. He can feel the Uchiha reign him closer— his jaw resting on his shoulder —and he won't stop him, because Naruto's like a rag doll, his hair lolling against his cheek and body limp.

Sasuke's careful, gingerly touching each injury while inspecting it. Everything hurts less while Sasuke keeps that hold on him, though it doesn't do much for the ache.

When he's settled down, Naruto thanks whatever god that's still out there. Sasuke lays him back carefully, and glances back at... at... something Naruto doesn't even want to consider.

_''I will try to hurt you as little as possible. But I want you to be patient. Okay?''_

Naruto tried to stay focused, to keep his attention locked on Sasuke's face. Those eyes... god, they were so centered now. He was losing his train of thought. Soon though, the blond whimpered, feeling more than seeing Sasuke's needle begin to thread his raw skin. His breathing became ragged; a tad off beat. No matter, his attention lingered on Sasuke.

Almost like he was trying to pretend none of this was happening— that he wasn't so broken and Sasuke wasn't trying to drag him back from the dark —and it was just another day. Where Konoha was bright... where the people still smiled.

''S-sas..!'' His eyes snapped shut, trying to block the brunt force of the sting that came from Sasuke's work. Another tired whimper clotted in his throat, choking him. The blond knew Sasuke was almost done, that all of this pain was unavoidable... but each flicker of movement felt like someone pounding on his head from the inside out.

By the time Sasuke actually shifted back, finished with his work, Naruto was stalling for air. His head drooped, tears welling in his eyes. He knew Sasuke had made sure to be extremely careful, but Naruto felt more dead than alive. Blue eyes drifted to a soft close for some moments, feigning an awkward composure.

When they opened again, they immediately looked for Sasuke; for his dark hair, his brooding expression, and tense reserve. A hazy smirk grew on those lips, only a small portion actually cooperating from the idea of comforting his Uchiha's nerves.

The smirk quickly fell into a grimace however, as he sighed. The blond could barely manage to move his right hand while the jutsu slowly wore off, and doggedly drug it upward an inch or so to touch some of the bandages Sasuke was starting to wrap around his ill frame.

Really, the kyuubi was going to reach for the Uchiha in passing, but knew he'd be unable to pull such a thing off. So, he settled for second best. Sasuke's hands glided effortlessly against each part of his skin, covering him in bits of white to hide the marred skin beneath.

How many people might die because he received this treatment?

The question settled harshly on his lips, waiting to be asked. Naruto tried to count the number of wrappings Sasuke had cared to tend him with, but found himself getting distracted as time wore on. Finally, the boy just flicked his attention to those black eyes... defeated.

''A-are they healed?'' the question is firm.

He's already trying to picture what villagers may have readily survived, but hesitated in asking the true number. Because he was scared of it. Terrified. The blond stares at the dark angel just a couple feet away, swallowing his sanity and bottling up whatever throb still had the nerve to ring in his bones.

... Was Sasuke aware how different he seemed?

Naruto still couldn't place it. He'd give anything to touch that pale cheek of his though, and wipe it away. He'd missed Sasuke so much— been damned by his memory for so long— Naruto wished he could keep him closer than ever.. if only to prevent the Uchiha from running away. Because slowly, Naruto is beginning to realize that, Sasuke is all that he has left of himself.

''Promise me... t-they'll be okay.''

* * *

_Trouble finding parts of this story. I think some chapters aren't in my folders. I found the current one, but I can't seem to find the next one. _

_You understand if this keeps happening with more, I will have to end this story abruptly. I have most of the chapters, but if a few are missing, it's ruined, right? I don't like leaving gaps. We shall see what happens. :/_

_I apologize for this mess._

_Review, please!_

_Have a nice day. :D_


	16. The Confrontation

**The Confrontation**

**Sasuke's POV**

Sasuke put the tools away, wiping them carefully with a soft tissue so as to clean them from the little blood that had stained the steel. He was glad to be done with most of it. Of course, there were still areas he hadnt dared explore with his own hands. He was comfortable enough to treat Naruto's wounds as it was but he couldn't get more intimate than that and touch parts of Naruto's body that he even had problem touching in his own one.

Wiping the sweat away from his forehead, he fixed his eyes on Naruto's body, searching intensely for signs of any other wounds left untreated. After a brief examination, he realised he had taken care of the visible wounds and he had done a job finished leaving apart the places he didn't have the courage to go to.

He felt slightly relieved now that he wouldnt have to worry about Naruto's health anymore. With Kyubi inside him, the blond would heal faster now that the wounds had been stitched up. He felt partially guilty that Naruto had to go through the operation in full senses but it couldnt be helped and at least the result was satisfying.

In some moments, the paralysis would leave Naruto and the blond would be able to move once more. In fact it might have already be over, only that Sasuke couldnt tell, suddenly feeling too embarrassed to lock eyes with his former friend.

But the question that breaks the awkward silence next finds him off guard. Not really, he knew better than to expect Naruto to act selfless as he always did, but when Sasuke was so worried about him, showing how little the blond himself valued his own life and safety really got to Sasuke.

___Are they healthy?_

Sasuke sighed and forced his eyes on Naruto, onyx locking in sky blue.  
His glare was an angry one. A frustrated. He was honest about his feelings, whenever he had any. He never held back even if he knew how wrong he might sound at times. But after everything Naruto had seen about him, he wasnt afraid anymore if the blond would criticize him.

With Naruto it was like he always overviewed Sasuke's mistakes. Something Sasuke could never understand but he secretly took relief in it. He couldnt stand Naruto to never forgive him. It would sting. He didnt know why but that was the way it was.

And what kind of question was that? Healthy? The villagers? Most of them had been slaughtered on sight and the few ones that had survived, if they didnt serve for interrogation purposes, they were being sold as slaves or killed off.  
Of course, it was all decisions that Madara took and Sasuke wasnt involved in the way things got ran around with the captives but still it seemed as if Sasuke had to be the one to let Naruto in the sad of the situation.

And this fact, this very fact that he had to be in that difficult position of informing Naruto of the thing he'd least like to hear right now was making him all the more impatient and irritated. He didnt have to deal with that. He had had enough worry as it was to keep Naruto alive and treat him back to health.

''I don't know in what condition they are.'' He growled, and his voice was more of the allarming tone, yet Naruto didnt seem to grasp it, he didnt seem to catch the tension that had rose in the air around Sasuke as if warning for a angsty storm to come.

Promise me, …t-they'll be okay.

You, ungrateful, selfless moron, theatening to ruin my happiness with your carelesness. How will you stay in life if this is the least you care for?  
Sasuke almost felt tears of anger forming in his eyes but he pushed them back. However he didnt manage to do the same with the anger and awe that had gathered up inside him.  
He slowly turned his head upwards to look Naruto through his raven bangs.

''You idiot…'' he started off slowly, but then he pushed back a lock of hair and fixed his burning glare on Naruto's cerulean eyed.

''…you are the only one I care for! Why should I have to promise to you anything like that?'' he snapped, his tone getting higher by each passing second, in a stable pace.

Standing on his knees, he covered the distance fast between him and Naruto and grabbed the blond's arms, shaking him violently, as his hurt and anger had blinded him.

''I am wasting my time to keep you in life…and you! You…are throwing it away! Just because you are a selfless baka that can't deal with things the way they are! Wake up, Naruto! This is a war, what did you expect! Just because I happened to pity you, this doesn't mean Madara would feel the same for all of those pathetic villagers that once laughed so carelessly at my clan's expense! How dare you to ask me to care about them?

Aren't most of them dust, anyways? And the survivors are rotting in their cells, as we speak. Heck, there might not be anyone left by tomorrow. I am no God, I can't save them all! Truth, actually is, I dont give a ********! It is you that I was concerned about! But no you have to keep on tainting me like that just because I happened to care! You conceited idiot! Throwing your life away like that all the time, while I am trying to save you! Seeing you like that,…it…''

_It tears me apart…_

'' Ungrateful dobe!'' Sasuke whispered in an angry tone.

Realizing just how out of control he had been and how much he had let his emotions take over him, the raven pulled back and removed his hands from Naruto's shoulders, standing up and making some steps back, as he regained his composure partially, though he still felt agitated and was taking deep breaths to calm down.

That was Naruto for him, having that scary effect on him that made him expose thoughts and feelings that he never would have being with anyone else other than him.

His eyes tracing back on Naruto, he gave him the coldest stare he could manage and, though irritation was still swimming around in his onyx orbs.

''I pity you, Naruto. You want to help others but you have already given up on yourself. Tell me, how is this even possible?'' Sasuke asked , venom lingering bitterly in his husky voice which he made a great effort to make it come out as calm and collected but he couldn't help the slightly broken tone it had.

Damn you, Naruto. Why do I feel so vulnerable when you are around?  
Then, a brief silence followed, and suddenly he felt all the regrets washing down on him for having spoken so harshly to Naruto. The man was already traumatized, he didnt need Sasuke throwing salt in his wounds already.

His eyes wandered around the room as if he was searching for something when in reality he was merely trying to calm down. Taking a few slow but deep and silent breaths, his glance returned to Naruto, not being able to part eyes from him for long.

He wanted to say he was sorry, but he just couldnt bring himself to do it. His lips wouldnt open to let out the three words that were burning their tips in such a guilty way.  
Leaning his head slightly downwards, he let out a sigh and almost calmed down anymore, he walked back to his friend in a slow pace and bend down in front of him.

It seemed as the paralysis wasnt completely over as he hadnt noticed Naruto doing the slightest movement all this time. He hesitantly put a shaking hand on his shoulder and rubbed the spot with his thumb. Was it his way of saying sorry? One would figure it would need more than that to apologize for what he had said.

''I need to go soon so ...I think you should lay down on my bed. It would fasten your recovery.'' He said, eyes stably locked on Naruto's chest out of embarrassment.

Placing Naruto's arm over his shoulder, he dragged the blond closer so that Naruto was basing his weight on the raven, as the later slowly and carefully stood up, pulling Naruto with him. Clenching tightly on his arm, he led the blond to the comfy bed, covering the small distance that separated it from the pole rather fast but clumsily.

Leaning softly downwards, he placed the blond carefully on the mattress and pushed some pillows under his head so that he felt more comfortable. Dragging a thin white sheet over his body, he covered him to keep him warm, trying to keep an emotionless expression, eyes always avoiding Naruto's.

After doing so, he noticed Naruto's hand was lying out of the blanket, so he slowly took it in his hand and held it in silence for a few moments, his fingers squishing the soft tanned skin as if he was trying to find his sanity in the feeling of pleasant warmth the contact with the blond gifted him with.

As if he snapped out of his thoughts, he quickly glanced over Naruto stoically, as he dragged his hand under the blanket and onto his chest, where he left it to rest, while he removed his own hand that was still tingling from the touch with his kitsune.

Feeling in control of himself again, he locked eyes with Naruto seriously and nodded coldly.

''Get some rest. I will be back at noon, to give you your food.'' He said and with that he turned around rushingly, as if he was stressed that if he stayed any longer he might lose control again.  
Without looking back, he walked slowly and silently out of the room, closing the door behind him. He hadnt had any rest as he had planned and he still had the time to do so if he wanted, but for some reason he couldnt handle being in the same room with Naruto right now, after the tensed scene that had taken part some moments ago.

Some training might be exhausting at the state he was in right now, both mental and physical but it would be good to help him get his mind out of the torturing thoughts that haunted his mind at the moment on Naruto's honor.

**Naruto's POV**

It's all expectations and rarely forgiveness. Because in another's eyes, he is suppose to be invincible. Imperturbable. Naruto appears strong, confident, carelessly crafted to perfection. There is nothing that could ever falter him–nothing that leaves its mark.

Naruto knows this had once not been a complete lie, that this wasn't a complete mask he put on for the world. When they were younger, he had been all those things in turn. A fighter and a strategist, skilled yet stupid when the choices meant his life. His confidence had been earned, through his timeless experience, through battles... through blood. He was good at what he'd done, and he had a long line of survivors to show for it.

Keyword? _Had_.

This sanity–and its bite–were fleeting and temporary. No one was meant to keep it as long as he had. Though Naruto knows that even Sasuke still expects him to soldier on. If only he could see inside, to the truly twisted individual he had become. That cold, deformed heart was being wrenched into the grief for his people, changing him into something unlike what everyone would like to think he was.

Because the truth is, Naruto is nowhere near unbreakable.

He is full of unvoiced thoughts and late-night agony, and he struggles to keep every emotion he has from showing in his eyes. His insecurities, his pain, are an open book that no-one had ever cared to read. Half of them had known what drove him to hide it, while the other half lived in fear of having it revealed. _In the end, we're what's left._ Battle-scarred, talking without words, they knew the ins and outs of everything, including each other. When it was time, they knew that too.

They'd trained for years, laying the groundwork toward a future where they would be too slow to carry a job out–too damaged to have a decent chance at winning. His village no longer needed him, and his sanity couldn't stand to stay. So what's left of him now, with the way things are? He is what he does, and what he does makes no difference. But most of his success is a secret even from the people he helps. The people he _wanted_ to help. Inside, there is little of Naruto that's left.

This much should be written down or carved into the wall. He knows there is just that sense of duty and darkness, the countdown to abandonment. There is the knowledge that Sasuke will leave him, because history repeats itself and no one will ever stay for Naruto. He is one thin thread away from collapsing under his heartbreak. He understands he has work to do, and the mission will never end. And Sasuke may mock him, for being that selfish giver, may care under a fleeting note, but Naruto has never been allowed to be anyone else.

Why couldn't things be less complicated? He wanted a map. To have someone explain to him what he should do with his life. His entire being was questioned and events happened that were never supposed to happen in the slightest. Like, being here. And Naruto couldn't handle it. His eyes sought an underlying sanctuary, but found none.

Eventually, they drifted back to Sasuke.

They'd always juggled this relationship with many things; reading into each other's emotions without really being surprised nor afflicted. He was grateful for this in some ways, it came in handy now and it would come in handy when Naruto had to look at Sasuke with his final breath. Hell, it would come in handy when Naruto finally found a way to save someone, when the world started to crumble apart and the apocalypse happened. Unfortunately, the apocalypse had already started. For Naruto, at least.

Who looked at him as the hero, now?

A broken smile was plastered on his face, the expression fighting off a grimace that was paralyzed only by Sasuke's disapproval. No one would ever notice the little dark shade in his eye from the way he was suffering, or the sharp intake of breath from being in the Uchiha's presence. He was being torn apart from the inside out, and nothing would stop this gut wrenching feeling that had taken over.

''I don't know in what condition they are.''

He just wanted things to be fixed. Didn't Sasuke get that? He blinks slowly, eyes hardening under the glare. Perhaps Naruto was just selfish, thinking of his own guilt over Sasuke's concern.

''…you are the only one I care for! Why should I have to promise to you anything like that?''

Sky blue eyes watched Sasuke with every bit of intensity that was within them. What was he thinking? What is he going to do? All of these questions Naruto was asking and repeating in his head as the silence seemed to linger forever. Watching Sasuke was like watching a tsunami come headfirst into your path, tearing apart everything that had been built over the years, to carefully disguise the horror beneath. _You'll never understand, will you?_

He felt his stomach twist. Sasuke shouldn't expect so much. Shouldn't even plan for him to just keep smiling, and to dismiss all of his misery as Hokage with nothing more than a bat of the eye. God, Sasuke! This wasn't about _him_. It was about responsibility. The ones he had held obligation to. Protected. It was his job. He was suppose to think of himself as a guardian. As someone who looked after everyone else.

Even if it tore him apart.

Warm hands embraced his arms, jerking the blond back and forth in a brutal pace. Naruto's breath caught in his chest, choked in a haze of white as his vision swirled and Sasuke was lost to him.

''-Wake up, Naruto! This is a war, what did you expect! ''

Everything. Nothing at all.

Blue eyes look up at the estranged Uchiha, unbalanced and glassy. Because whatever the Hokage could've said to him is lost on those chapped lips, broken into bits of air. ''Truth, actually is, I don't give a ********! It is you that I was concerned about! But no you have to keep on tainting me like that just because I happened to care! You conceited idiot!

''**I didn't want you to help me.**''

Sasuke tilts his head subconsciously as he continues to yell, pronouncing his jaw in the dim light of the room. Naruto stares helplessly back at him, stilled only long enough as the hands that had always held him so callously also kept him from falling over.

''Throwing your life away like that all the time, while I am trying to save you! Seeing you like that,…it…''

A lump grows in Naruto's throat, quieting the blond. He's waiting, anticipating the rest of that sentence. Even though he knows that the Uchiha will never say what he really meant to convey. It's all being built to another moniker, a string of useless babble neither of them would hold onto in the distant future.

_Just forget me, Sasuke. It'll be okay._

Naruto wishes for maybe the millionth time that they could have a conversation with actual words, where meanings are clear and clearly stated. But he knows it'll never happen. Because both of them are pigheaded and stubborn. And both were meant for bigger things. _Worse_ things than a personal happiness.

''**I wanna go home.**'' In his mind, Naruto's pretending to be ten feet tall, with everything to lose. His voice betrays all that he works to gain, feigning a soft reign as he looks away from the raven ahead of him.

Sasuke asked something he didn't understand. The kyuubi-host felt his attention drift up, eyebrows knitting into a neat furrow as so much about him became that same statue from before.

How could he help others.. if he couldn't even help himself?

It was logical. An understandable and inquisitive question. One of which Naruto himself held no shred of balance toward explaining.

''**What else-**'' he sprouts, voice flat and tired, ''**am I suppose to do?**'' For Naruto, there would be no peace until the dead return again, and the world reversed it's fixture. His attention faded into something beyond Sasuke's figure, dreaming of an unseen home that had once been so dreadful and agonizing for the Uzumaki.

''**I could still help hem,**'' he whispers finally, uncaring of the shaking hand that seems to be wary of broaching him a second time. Naruto knows he will have bruises from the last time the Uchiha touched him, yet he holds no regard or ill-intent toward Sasuke as he makes a move forward again, fingertips grazing the soft plains of his shoulders in attempt to draw his focus. Back to reality from the place he wished had never been taken from him, and back onto the resolute firmness of his teammates betrayal.

''I need to go soon.. ''

Naruto isn't sure whether he nods or not, but faintly registers that Sasuke always has to leave- and that this is just another part of his memories taunting him with a present hurt. His eyes fall shut as he felt that arm wrap around him, being coaxed into a feeling of safety with Sasuke so near. When he was lifted, a numb arm stretched around Sasuke's torso and allowed him to bury his face in the crook of his neck, almost hiding. The taste of copper was still hot on Naruto's tongue, robbing any chance for the blond to memorize Sasuke's sweet smell, or the way his body fitted perfectly against his own.

It was ironic in a sense, how easily he drew into step with this traitor again. All these years of wanting and dreaming.. and now that he had the Uchiha within grasp, he would do nothing more than bask in the silence bestowed upon them.

The world around him shifts; melting like a faded memory to new scenery... a new angle in the pristine room. Naruto is ashamed, his head tilted away from the other. It was like being on fire, stuck so close. Did he get that? Naruto blinks, and damn, if he doesn't feel the tears resurfacing.

_I'm_so_sorry._

A lingering touch is drawn against his hand, stalling at the edge of each finger as it's drawn upward, cradled by Sasuke. And it was fitting, in a sense, for the boy who thought he lost everything, to be rescued by the boy who'd lost his childhood before he could understand what was going on.

He was holding his hand.

It felt warm in such a cold embrace, the pale limb forming across his own. What was it about the Uchiha that made everything slow down? That made time stop?

_Nothing can be rebuilt if time stops._ He brushed the tips of his fingers against the back of Sasuke's wrist, speaking without needing. ''Get some rest. I will be back at noon, to give you your food.'' He knew then, that Sasuke had shut him out. The blond waited; held his breath; and watched as he'd left him in this barren room again.

Left him with the fragments of everything he once was. Despite everything he's seen and battled.

Too bad forgetting doesn't end it.

Naruto drifts asleep within moments of muttering against Sasuke's pillow; his blond locks tumbling down past the nape of his neck as his breathing hallowed out. The comfort that he chases is only short lived, but it's long enough that Naruto is given a decent resting order, and has time to relinquish the hurt inside his body.

[ timeskip ]

He'd spent his life trying to make up for something that had never been his fault to begin with. So it made sense, that now that he'd wasted so much of the medical supplies, Naruto should concede to not eating. Such an ideal may not make sense to some, but in the Hokages mind, you had to give to take. Air rasped from his lungs as he remained utterly still, watching with defeated interest as the food before him remained uneaten, unconsumed. The Uchiha hadn't come anywhere near him since returning, and Naruto hadn't done much to help the matter.

Unconciously, he swept his attentions toward his hand, carefully shifting each finger to make sure he'd retained full control since waking up.

''**Teme,**'' The name breathes out in a rush of lost focus. Naruto can't think–he just nudges the food away. ''**.. I'm not hungry.**'' Do people like Naruto get second chances? Soft eyes drift to a close, figuring that Naruto already knew the answer to such a foolish question.

Nonetheless, he was careful to continue pushing away the food provided to him. He's just so tired even after the couple hours of sleep he'd just had, and blames the kyuubi for trying to keep him from something he wants to be without in the first place;_life_.

''**I..**'' the words are slow to form, being processed in the Hokage's mind. The blond tilts backward, levelling his gaze with the ceiling. He leaves Sasuke waiting, just like the many times the other has him. 


	17. Lullaby

**Sasuke's POV**

Sasuke looks silent at his weapons, laid one by one on the small leather in front of him. He presses two fingers against his left brow, rubbing it softly in tiredom.

He had returned some good 15 minutes ago, and he had left Naruto's food on the bed, next to the blond but Naruto hadn't touched anything so far from his plate and Sasuke himself felt too tired to focus his attention on that.

He was busy, busy wondering what he had done wrong during his last training battle, what amount of chakra he ought to have used during that particular jutsu, which was that movement his opponent had made that he expected the least without relying on his sharingan…Things he often obsessed with after every battle but only that this time he was actually using them to avoid thinking of the only person he didn't feel like dealing with right now: Naruto.

Sasuke would have very much rathered to avoid going back into that heated room, but the sense of responsibility was weighing heavily on his shoulders. He just couldn't afford to let Naruto starve. He had given both himself and the blond a promise: to take care of him. And he would do it, even if he had to suffer sentimentally out of their meetings.

But damn it, was Naruto making it so difficult? Upon hearing his rejection once more, he tried to suppress a frustrated sigh that came for his lips and he settled for a low grunt instead.

_Teme…, I am not hungry._

It was the last thing he wanted to hear right now. Pinching the arc of his nose, he kept his glance on the small weapons laying in front of him, as if he was still examining them, his eyes shifting to each and every one of them, each passing second.

He thought Naruto could tell by now what Sasuke's reaction ought to be in those words. Oh ,wasn't he stubborn, though. Sasuke was stuffed to his limits, as Naruto didn't seem to have got phased by what he had told him before. He had a feeling it would be harder than he thought to take care of the dobe. Annoyingly hard.

He remained in silence, not wanting to waste more energy to yelling at the blond, it was pointless either way. Though, he didn't know for how much longer he'd be able to refrain himself for punching him right on his hurting face.

He did his best so far because he didn't want to hurt him more in the condition he was. But Naruto was making it too hard for him to stay his usually emotionless self. Well, wasn't that a characteristical one of the many effects the blond had on the raven?

His eyes flickered lightly as he heard again the blond's voice.

''_I…''__]_

Sasuke rolled his eyes, secretly, and was about to shrug Naruto off, when he noticed something strange…The man had left his sentence hanging on the middle, kind of unusual of him, seeing as he always was his loud idiot self.

His glance still pinned in the small area in front of his knees, he wondered how much of a toll the recent happenings had really taken on his ex teammate. It pained him to see him like that. It wasn't the first time after their reunion to realize how much Naruto had changed, but it always hurt the same-if not more- to see it reconfirmed by every new uncharacteristic attitude Naruto had adopted lately.

Sasuke didn't raise his eyes on Naruto. He didn't have the power to do so. He knew if he did, he wouldn't be able to hide the pain he felt for Naruto's current bad psychological condition. He was broken.

Feeling awkward at the prolonged silence, he raised an eye brow with curiosity.

Sighing in a depressed motion, he decided to break it.

''Naruto…'' his tone was soft, yet serious, a hint of defeat and sadness lacing it.

''You do remember what you told me earlier this morning, right? ''

His fingers instinctively clenched around a kunai at the bitter yet so vivid memory.

_I didn't want you to help me._

He didn't know why he said what he did next, but it was more one of those random impulsive moments of him that Naruto seemed to bring upon him so often lately.

''You told me that you didn't want my help.'' At that, he raised his head slightly to look over at Naruto's direction, eyes still pinned soullessly on the wooden floor.

''But you seem to forget that once I was the one needing your help, as you thought then. And even if I told you I didn't want it, this was never enough of a reason for you to stop trying. Even when you knew it was pointless, you never gave up on me, did you?'' his tone was soft, a small chuckle gracing the end of his sentence.

''I suppose that you understand how I feel now, then. So, stop being a hypocrite.''

At that, he finally dared to look into Naruto's eyes, a hint of anger and awe swimming around in his onyx orbs. Naruto had tried his best to understand Sasuke in the past, in a time at which this was the least Sasuke cared for.

But now it was different. He did need Naruto to understand him. He knew he was selfish for putting himself over the countless innocent victims of Konoha, for which Naruto was responsible once. But he had shut his conscience off long ago, even before he had killed Itachi. He had shut it down for everyone else that wasn't Naruto.

Such things didn't have an effect on him. Because in his little own twisted and self righteous world, he did have the right to be selfish. He did have the right to want Naruto's attention , tears, hatred and love only for himself. He didn't care if he was an insensitive b*****d for that. All he knew is that his only chance to life, his only go at survival was Naruto. And a broken one didn't quite fit the image he had built in his mind about that moment.

He would make Naruto forget. Even if he had to break him and stitch him back together for this to happen. Maybe the blame and the innocent blood would never fade out from Naruto's conscience, but forgetting made moving on easier.

And just like everyone, Naruto would have to move on eventually. Because, Sasuke was afraid…He was afraid to see Naruto staying forever in the past, caught in his own guilts and ifs, just like Sasuke had.

No, that was a terrible fate, no one else but himself and only deserved.

But Sasuke was Sasuke.

And Naruto was Naruto.

A brief silence followed again. Gathering up his strength, Sasuke stood up weakly and walked over to Naruto, sitting softly down on the edge of the bed, eyes on the untouched food.

He always hated talking too much. But it seemed as today from all days, he couldn't avoid it.

''Don't think you are going to save any lives by not eating this. It will be forced upon you, just like with your medical treatment. ''his tone was harsh but tired.

He could very well lean on the bed, by Naruto's side, close his eyes and drift off to dreamland-if dreams were still a possibility in the painfully real emptiness that filled him.

He helped Naruto sit in a proper stance, in order for him to consume the food without a problem.

Yeah, right, good luck with that. He mocked himself inwardly.

It seemed as f he would have to feed Naruto himself. Which was actually less embarassing than the thought of letting Naruto starve to death out of his own hesitations.

Shifting closer to Naruto, he dragged the plate closer to them and picked a rice ball.

Cutting it in small pieces, he turned his gaze to Naruto, taking in his weak form. Was it exhaustion that made desperate tears threaten his eyes? He didn't know.

Taking Naruto's hand in his, he opened his palm out flatly and placed a small digestible piece of the rice ball in it and wrapped Naruto's fingers around it.

''Eat it.'' He said and he was frightened by how weak and tired his own voice sounded.

His eyes bored steadily into Naruto's, looking at him pleadingly.

When Naruto made no move to taste the food, he felt his moral go even lower.

Taking the food from Naruto's hand in nerve, he forced it into his mouth and placed his palm over his lips.

He kept sealing his mouth like this till the blond was done chewing the rice ball and it had gone down his throat.

Sasuke grunted satisfied, and then did the same with most of the pieces in the plate, always following the same forceful pattern.

When he was done and he saw Naruto would take no more, he smirked faintly, placing the plate on a small wooden trunk that served as a bed stand right next to the bed.

His eyes shifting back to lock with Naruto's cerulean temples, he couldn't help the small hint of gratitude and relief that was coming and going in them like a broken light.

He closed his eye lids for a second, exhaustion taking over. He didn't remember when was the last time he had taken a proper sleep. Well, it sure was before he met with Naruto, that was one thing he could know.

Without much thinking, his pale hand slipped under the covers and hesitantly found Naruto's nesting in it and clenching softly the blond's fingers as he rubbed them with his thumb in a monotonous motion that strangely seemed to calm the raven down.

''Naruto,…thanks.''

It was but a faint whisper before his powers finally left him as he leaned closer to Naruto, so much that his breath was haunting over the blond's neck in an unsteady pace.

His eye lids shut tiredly down, slowly, leaning closer to the other man by the second.

His mind so conveniently did't register when his hand abandoned Naruto's warm one , or when it settled on the blond's chest, gripping on his shirt perhaps a bit too needily for his own likes.

But he did realize when he leaned his head on his ex teammate's shoulder, when the said head slid slightly down his chest and when it finally settled for the place over Naruto's heart.

It did register the fast and uneven heart beats that functioned as a lullaby that was only meant for him to hear, for him to put him to sleep.

He softly nudged his head against the spot, as a strange feeling of completeness filled him in a flash.

_Damn you, Naruto, why sometimes it feels so nice being close to you and some others it feels like hell?_

Deciding he liked the current feeling of the rhythmical pillow under his dizzy head, he let his partial weight press down on the beloved kitsune, as he almost instantly drifted off to a peaceful-after a long time- sleep.

**Naruto's POV**

Naruto needed a miracle.

Although in his head, the idea seemed completely horrid. Maybe it was because of the word. Yeah, that's it. To him, 'miracle' represented something entirely foreign and undesirable. Maybe even a more foolish whim than his own self. More so, he disliked miracles because he'd never depended on them before. So to look for one now as a broken hope didn't seem like such a grand idea. Let alone.. a dependable one. But if it mattered at all, he still tried. Again and again and again. Naruto admits he was willing to lay down any price required, or any part of himself that might've been unhindered by what's already happened. As long as it meant gaining some small miracle, nothing mattered. There wasn't a price that could be too steep. Not an idea too drastic.

He just wanted to save those people.

Was that so bad?

He dreamed of seeing the round-faced children of Konoha again, and promising them all the happiness and faith that could no longer belong in the confines of his own self. He wanted to whisper that their nightmare would all be fixed- and that those nameless faces could stop lurking in the crevices or shadows, because tomorrow- sweet god tomorrow -everything would be better.

Because Naruto didn't deserve the miracle. They did.

_I'll give anything. Do you hear me? Just… just…_

It's that kind of awareness that keeps him spiraling. Especially since Naruto's true weakness has never lied with the obvious imperfections or the kyuubi. No. He has dealt with more counseling and torment than one could think possible in such subjects. He's battled for his life, and barely come out on the winning edge of every disaster. But; it doesn't help when he remembers his people's health is falling rapidly in those cells, ready to follow every bit of Madara's will, or being urged into nothingness. It doesn't help when Naruto begs Sasuke to do the same, though Naruto's not going to cross that line on a "maybe" that isn't guaranteed.

Naruto's weakness is his family, period. It might cost him one day— hell, it's already taken _everything_—but it runs to the bone.

He's only human.

And for Naruto, his family starts with Konoha and finishes with Sasuke Uchiha. He knew that the raven remembered their childhood with a totally different aspect, but Naruto.. Naruto was bargaining for something or someone to reverse this, since nobody within physical reach would. Naruto wanted to see them stand strong, albeit he knew that he wasn't right for the job. If he could only get it started…

_You can even take my life, if you want it. But you need to-_

If things were different, Naruto wouldn't want to miss a second of his time with the boy sitting across from him. If things were meant to be better, he would be laughing or joking about how funny Gai looked trying to grow out his beard. But he wasn't, and things weren't.

Sasuke may not understand, but Naruto did.

It was his fault this had happened. For not being very focused at his job and for not caring enough to see it coming. So that meant it was his resolve to fix it. He'd never even deserved the title of Hokage, knowing now that he'd only served to make it brittle and defeated.

_Think about what you've done, Naruto. All the steps you took that were so wrong._ Quietly, the blond is finding each piece that makes him the full-picture of Konoha's destruction. Unfortunately, there's no way to know how much farther his resolve can be crushed, until it's put to the test. Naruto feels his jaw clench with each part, mapping out the misery and horror over himself, while tracing languid shapes in the blanket.

_You can have it all, if you just-_

Consciously brushing against the lurking creature stuffed within the pit of his soul, Naruto stiffens at the overwhelming rush it gives him. He'd planned on taunting the fox later on, setting fire to the one thing he should never approach. But he's desperate here, thinking of all those faces and oh _god_ Sasuke, he wants everything to be okay again. So much so he's willing to push whatever he has left into a grave.

''Naruto…''

The word draws him from the darkest corner of his mind, luring him back to the blankets. Blue eyes are dull, doggedly focusing on the ninja before him. The rhythm of his heart is awkward, anticipating the ongoing threat and danger that might be lurking within. He knows what he's praying for is useless. How it's another melancholy attempt at salvaging what he's already lost. But it doesn't keep him from wondering, or questioning all that's presented before him. The blond blinks, snuffing out the imaginary ember whom might've grown into his kyuubi.

Naruto watches Sasuke, wary.

He wanted to pretend he wasn't quite so sentimental toward the other now, but anyone could tell you just how impossible that was. By all means, he'd been so desperate to be in Sasuke's company for so long, he still felt that distinct relief seeing the Uchiha was simply okay. That he was all in one piece.

_Look what I've done, teme! Don't you understand?_

Naruto's breath huffs out all at once, his body protesting such a harsh movement. Sasuke's growling at him about being a hypocrite, justifying Naruto's childish manner. On some level, he does understand the point however, and sifts back in the bed.

And just like that, it was like a switch had been flipped.

One second, Sasuke's over _there_, and the next, he's _here_. ''**Um?**'' Naruto is embarrassed by the way his voice cracks, but can't help the way the anticipation suddenly swells his chest to bursting, which he has held clamped down by fear for so long. He thinks for a moment that Sasuke will do nothing more than cave to his statement, and just give the food away. Because it'd make things easier. Maybe even tide his friends over until something could answer his miracle.

''Don't think you are going to save any lives by not eating this. It will be forced upon you, just like with your medical treatment. ''

So maybe Naruto's a bit of a light-hearted fool, not believing a word Sasuke says. He's so caught up in the way Sasuke's slumping, he doesn't care to focus much on the food being set in his hand, or the way Sasuke takes care in cutting each piece, and curling his fingers around it.

It's almost like Naruto doesn't comprehend what's going on, and meerely pushes the process from his mind. Cus' to him, his people deserve the food. Not him. And any second now, Sasuke's going to give it to the rightful owners.

_Wait, I-!_

Naruto jerks, eyes widening. He's pawing at Sasuke's arm as food is unwillingly shoved into his mouth, forcing the ex-Hokage to chew. He chokes as rice slithers down his throat- burning and making him feverish with anger. One look at his avenger though, and he slows. Begins to pout really, but quickly dropping his resistance. Sasuke sounded so tired, appeared so worn out. Something about that reached inside Naruto and _burned_, going deeper than any words could.

_He shouldn't be doing this._

He swallows forcefully as Sasuke crams bit after bit, attention never shifting from the hollow expression on the man's face, or the bags settled unnecessarily beneath those eyes.

When he's finished, Naruto groaned. He was about to roll over and try to brush the entire situation off, when he felt the soft chill of blankets moving, and something warm sweeps against his hand. A question remains perched at the tip of his tongue; being shushed in it's own way as Sasuke's hand begins to linger, and his expression smoothens out. Naruto is almost afraid to move, lest he shatter some kind of spell.

''Naruto,…thanks.''

It wasn't the miracle he was asking for.

But... it was better than anything he'd imagined.

The blond's heart seems to stall altogether, watching as Sasuke fell down beside him. Everything about that moment has become timeless, and Naruto can't help but blink with confusion as to why Sasuke was thanking him in the first place. In correlation, his free hand began to draw upward, hesitating once or twice as he tried to decipher the true nature of the raven's exhaustion. Eventually, the ex-Hokage allows his hand to curve comfortingly against Sasuke's ear, drawing a deep breath as he tangled his fingers in those raven locks.

There is too much between them now for either to be letting his guard down like this. Naruto misses seeing Sasuke in such stillness, misses the clarity that Sasuke used to give him.

He leans closer now, taking in those heavy eyelashes and unfurrowed brow. Asleep, Sasuke is like nothing short of a fallen angel, and Naruto aches for the innocence that was taken so long ago. His eyes are drawn to a brief close, trying not to concentrate on the feel of his breathing.. or the way Sasuke remained so fittingly against his chest.

"**I wish you'd never left,**" he murmured into that dark hair, as he stroked the other's cheek and breathed in comfort, Sasuke, and solace. They were one and the same. Naruto's grief has been quieted temporarily, his panic laid to rest. He felt Sasuke's body and his own blending together, forming a completeness that he had never known he was chasing.

For the first time he could remember, Naruto can breathe normally.

Hours tick by and daylight drifts into nightfall. The blond dozes in and out the entire time, his focus never once drifting far enough aside from keeping Sasuke close.

When he finally _does_ stir into complete awareness, it's unexplainable as to why.

There is no hint of noise or movement in the room, and no ''feeling'' to be noted. Still, Naruto's head lifts as his gaze sweeps across the windows and corners. His eyes follow the unsightly path to the curtains, slowly coming back to rest on his friend lying beside him. Naruto has remained on his back all this time, head tilted toward the avenger, although at the moment, he can only concentrate on the way Sasuke's chest rises and falls like the sea inside of him. His skin has the sheen of silk, and Naruto's breath catches in his throat at the thought of touching it.

His hand droops to Sasuke's shoulder then, reigning him impeccably closer. The touch is gentle and soft; barely noticeable to the sleeping figure. But Naruto's staring down at him still, a tiny spanse of recognition coming to his face.

_I missed you, teme._

_

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_

A lot of cheesy words and moments in this chapter , I know! .

I hope I don't put you off.

I am on an updating spring now. I havent updated in months and I feel guilty but also I want to get done with the remaining chapters.

Review plz.


	18. Dreaming By Your Side

**Dreaming By Your Side**

**Sasuke's POV**

A peaceful sleep, you say? Maybe…it had been one till the usual nightmares popped up and ruined any false sense of serenity calming down his wary soul.

* * *

_Little Sasuke is running._  
_He is running, running, running…But where? He can't see but he knows…He knows, he is just running to the usual same place he is running to every single time of that cold night that is repeating itself in his tormented mind: his house._

_Itachi's figure is far away one moment and the next he is standing in front of him in all of his mysterious murderous galore._

_His eyes are bigger than usual, like swollen. But he doesn't seem sad. Instead, he bursts out in a maniacal laughter that sends bolts of disgust and bad premonition to the little Sasuke, bolts of anger and bitterness for the betrayal on his part…because he already knows what's happened, only that he isn't supposed to, because it is just a bad dream and Itachi is just his guilty conscience trying to suck out of him the last hint of dignity still keeping him together._

_''Foolish little brother…Revenge lead you nowhere. Now, go! Go back into that dark cold house, enter that room filled with blood and murder and tragedy! Go! All you will always see when you enter it will be just the same dead family. Nothing's ever changed. Foolish little brother…nothing…''_

_And little Sasuke runs off like a lightning, tears streaming down his eyes, …he runs into his house, Itachi's words still lingering in his ears like a radio that forgot to move on to the next song, always playing the same creepy depressive tune all over._

_And there, for a minute, he freezes. He halts, cold in his step, as if he has been stabbed but can feel pain no more. The tears come to an end and all of a sudden his skin is completely dry again. But his eyes are wide and full of shock, fright and disbelief._

_His parents are laying soulless on the floor, butchered and blood forming a thin round pool around on the carpet, soaking their clothes._

_Sasuke holds his head with both hands, shutting his eyes tight, refusing to believe what is unfold before his young scared eyes. But he knows…a voice inside him tells him it is truth. He has been reliving the same scene all ever again, since that day that it happened for real._

_But suddenly, he noticed that he has been hearing other moans and whines all along. Faint, but tragic and sad. And they are costant, they are threatening to make his head explode, too much pain filling the dark atmosphere._

_He opens his eyes in a flash, his gaze falling in fear on the people who are surrounding his parents. They look pale as dead, they have gashes and deep wounds decorating all around their fickle bodies and in the air, the smell of rot…coming from them._  
_They are covering their eyes as tears are streaming down their cheeks and mix with the blood on the floor, all the while letting out loud mourning moans, their heads tilted to the dead parents on the floor._

_Light? Where is light? Please, push that darknes away! I can't stand it!_  
_Father…Mother…_  
_Somewhere behind all these maze of unknown villagers, he manages to see a faint source of light in the back of the room._  
_He circles around the small crowd, completely deaf to their tearful curses anymore._

_The more he approaches, the more it seems like a small childish figure is standing in that light._

_It seems to be hugging its knees, and its little fragile body, dressed in casual summer clothes is trembling as if the kid is sobbing._  
_Sasuke can't help his curiosity, he walks closer and closer and closer, till he is standing only an open palm away from the crying being._

_The petite fragile form shifts softly at the sound of Sasuke's voice._

_''Who are you?''_

_He can tell kid has an innocent peaceful aura emanating from it, like that of an angel striken with confusion. And he can recognize who he is when the little boy lifts his head to look up to Sasuke, tears still running down, but determined expression._

_When he looks into those hurting and accusative eyes, he can't help but also notice a hint of guilt racing around in them like a prisoner that is fighting desperately for his freedom. But it feels so strong. And for a reason he doesn't know, he feels as if what he is looking into the boy's eyes is nothing more than just a reflection of his own inner feelings._

_''I am you.'' The boy replies._

Sasuke's breath is coming to a softer end, as he wakes up silently but not any less agitated from his nightmare.

He had always been having bad dreams about that day. But he didn't remember when the kid form had started becoming part of them. He couldn't remember, it was impossible to keep a record. He had lost count of how many times he has seen the same dream over and over again. It is almost as if his subconscious is trying to tell him something. Is he really feeling guilt somewhere inside him? What is that dream trying to tell him? He almost scolds himself inertly for trying to explain dreams. Being a pragmatist, he should know dreams don't make sense.  
But his thoughts are soon coming to an end, as he realizes stunned where he is laying.

There is a candle lighting the small room and he can see he is lying next to Naruto- a part of him onto the blond's body.  
He can more actually smell the dobe than see him. And that familiar scent is enough to both make him feel safe but also make him wonder how he ended up there on the first place.  
Trying to recollect his thoughts, he results that it must have been when he had sat on the bed to feed him.

Damn it, I knew it wasn't a good idea.

But now it is too late to be regretting over this. Still not having overcome the double shock-one of the nightmare and the other of him laying almost on top of Naruto, he stays completely still, merely focusing on his and Naruto's breath, as they meddle together so perfectly, even if so different.

His is slowly calming down, passing from a frenetic rhythm to a stable relatively relaxed one.  
Naruto's is just calm, rather a tad bit fastened at some moments but that's just about it.

He lets out a silent sigh, his chest weighing tired against Naruto's. Moving softly his head around the spot, he notices Naruto's hand around his shoulder and realizes the kitsune had dragged him closer.  
This sudden proximity, as if everything had been okay between them since ever, was scaring him.

Not that he didn't enjoy it, but he didn't understand it and he couldn't explain it, thus it was slightly freaking him out.  
But looking back to the past, he came to notice how it was him himself to initiate physical contact with the blond most of the times. Yet, when he caught himself on action, he felt rather taken aback by the easiness he had into doing it.

He didn't know whether the blond was asleep or not. He was afraid to move, as if he didn't want to break a begnin spell that was tying them together so harmonically.

Feeling still slumbering, he tried to move softly upwards. Whether he knew how he ended up like that or not, it didn't matter a lot compared to the fact that he didn't have enough strength to resist Naruto's natural warmth that was stroking his body on the places they came in contact.

Moving slightly upwards, careful not to move Naruto along, he slowly let his head down on Naruto's neck, burying his face deep in its crook .  
He was probably going to regret this in the morning, if Naruto found him like that, but as long as he could steal more of those tingly personal moments with his dobe, he felt ready to deal with any consequences.

As long, as he and Naruto were close…

His left hand moved slowly to Naruto's upper side of head and his fingers entangled in his golden blocks, playing with them softly in a stable rhythm.

He closed his eyes, taking in Naruto's familiar soft scent: he smelt of oranges and vanilla flowers.  
A fuzzy warmth dominated his entire being, as he silently pushed his body closer to Naruto's, to recover for the distance that was created upon his former movement.

Now he could feel his front coming in contact with Naruto's side. It felt safe, comforting, holding him so close.

There were so many things he longed to say to Naruto, so many things that he hated keeping inside him forever, so many things that ravished his heart dizzy, screaming to him to speak up…and probably Sasuke, as always, would just ignore those spontaneous feelings if he was in a proper state of mind…but being under the effect of slumber didn't do it for him and thus he ended up saying things instead:  
'' Naruto…'' it was a soft mumble, against the blond's neck.

'' Don't let go…Ever. I don't want to lose you again.'' He whispered, completely forgetting to take into account whether Naruto could hear him confessing such affectionate and needy thoughts or not, in all of his slumber.

He was too dizzy to put his mind in an order at the moment, plus having Naruto so close to him certainly had a strong effect to his heart's strings. It felt that every time they touched, they could see, they could read inside each other. They could understand each other, see right in each other's hearts ,feel what each other felt.

And if they paid close attention to it, they might even be able to see that...they felt the same things deep down. They were the same in their cores of their hearts. Only that Sasuke had never realized it before, he had never opened up for anyone to see. And Naruto was always open about how he felt.

Be it pain, love, anger, loneliness, betrayal,...guilt...They had both experienced the same feelings during their lives, even if under different circumstances.

Sasuke now realized that, knowingly or not, he had given his heart to the the blond anymore, and he couldn't possibly live without his heart, thus he couldn't possibly live without Naruto.

Cause Sasuke and Naruto were one… Two souls in one body, one soul in two bodies…It really didn't matter what he phrased it as…because the boy in his dream seemed to know the answer long before the raven had even searched for it:

_The little boy looks up at him, tears still running down from his clear cerulean eyes, but with a determined expression on his innocent childish face, that tanned skin marked with whiskers, fading behind his messy golden locks.__  
__Naruto…_

_''I am you.''_

And upon those tender thoughts…, Sasuke let his hot tears run down on his friend's neck.

_Maybe life had a meaning, afterall._

**Naruto's POV**

The world has stopped outside, leaving silence to rule the white room with a dull air. Everything around them is stagment; forgotten amongst a sea of ivory. And still, Naruto can't find it inside himself to take his eyes away from Sasuke. He's scared, mostly, about what's happening. About whether after all these years, he's finally gotten what he's wanted— or if he's fallen victim to another cruel illusion.

Sometimes, Naruto isn't even sure whether any of them actually survived.

He blinks, brushing the pad of his fingers against the soft skin of Sasuke's arm. Every breath the other takes is like electricity being shot into his veins, ruining him with the overwhelming serenity and perfection of pain. Did he register how deep this dark devotion could possibly run?

Probably not. Naruto nuzzles his face in Sasuke's hair, sighing desperately and trying to suck in every detail of this moment. Because if there's one thing Naruto's learned, it's that this quiet is short-lived. So he watches tensely, as smooth breaths are broken by the knowledge of what's coming.

Nothing lasts forever, least of all him.

He feels himself slipping at the edge of consciousness, where the pale skin and serenity will soon be replaced by blood. Strong, potent blood that will coat his hands, and rip Sasuke away.

''Don't let go…Ever. I don't want to lose you again.''

Albeit startled by the words, he wants to promise that he won't. That he _can't._ Not even if they're torn apart by things Naruto will never understand.

But he doesn't.

Because unlike past encounters, he's no longer sure of whether he'll be able to keep that promise, or if he'll just be forgotten by the morning's twilight. And if things were different, he would have tried with everything he had in him to make it happen. But things won't just change in a matter of hours, so he holds no hope for wishing on what he knows is impossible. Blue eyes swim with memories and regrets, remembering the plans he had for their lives.

Suffice to say, none of this had been in the dream. Looking back, he knew that he wouldn'tve believed a word of it, had someone warned him. Everything had been so bright- so torrent with promise. The academy built up their lives as ninja for years, promising more than possible.

God, he still remembered the look on Sasuke's face, the day they graduated.

It was the same repugnance he'd admired for the duration of their commradery; a type of nobility and sophistication no child should be forced to grasp at such an age. He knows it had bothered him for petty reasons at the time.. but they hadn't wound up in this situation simply because they were competitive teammates.

No, it was something stronger than that. Something neither would ever admit to knowing. Then again, personal afflictions had never came up, in all their training— the line was drawn at "targets, not people," and there was never the possibility for conflict over what was necessary and what it would cost.

They'd all been a bunch of kids pretending to be grown ups, killing each other over a petty rivalry. And now the remaining 'survivors' were equally damned because of it; scarred up and destroyed by a war he never wanted to fight, never intended to become a part of. It has captured Naruto's vibrancy and left him broken and blackened inside, and murdered all of their friends. It has ripped away everything again and again, until he was left screaming in that cell.

No one would ever understand it, either.

Sounds of Sasuke's devastation are the glittering shards left in his spirit, slicing through Naruto's heart like the cruelest, coldest glass. Naruto grieves for Sasuke, for all the ways he can't protect him. The world is larger and less controlled than even their darkest doubts had ever fathomed. But Naruto's arms hold Sasuke so tightly to hide the betrayal that wavers within them, to keep him from the swallowing black in this empty room.

''**Shh..**'' he whispers, looking listlessly to the window, as if stars alone could save them. ''**I'm here.**''

The worst part is that Naruto can't tell if Sasuke's tears are all for a dream, or partly for himself.

It's for this reason, that he wants to know where things suddenly went so wrong—why no one told them about all these gray areas that have found Naruto, that made his confidence bleed.

Fingers begin to twine their way though his hair, lulling him from the consideration. His attention slants from the window at an agonizing pace, giving him time to count the breaths Sasuke takes, and the traitorous hitches that give way to the raven's misery. It draws him to glance down, sleepily acknowledging Sasuke's outline fitted against him; and allows himself to relax.

Unfortunately, morning comes too soon.

The first thought in Naruto's head when he awakes, is _ouch._ His body feels like it's on fire, crackling beneath skin. His ribs are throbbing, advertising the dull ache left-over during from healing session by the fox's command. He fights off the urge to let go of a low moan, or stretch back and choke on something tangible. His second thought, once cleared of the hurt, is Sasuke.

The kitsune brushes a sluggish hand along the edge of the other's cheek, creating a timeless embrace to ensure that he's still there- even when he could sense it. And for a moment, Naruto sits back in wonder. If he could do this for eternity, of watching over Sasuke… could he handle it?

He'd agree in a heartbeat, even if it meant spending the rest of his time in the Netherworld, but still— it's Naruto's fault for everything bad that's happened to Konoha. He knows he could try, but he's dreading the possibility of failure. What it could mean if he failed.

He has to think logically. He can't be so selfish anymore.

Sasuke is better off without him in almost every way, and he swears he'll give him up the moment Uchiha chooses. He's lived without Sasuke before, survived and endured as ninja do. It wasn't favorable, but he'd managed.

It was a day by day process, something you couldn't look too far ahead with, lest you fall upon the hidden agony. In the end, he'd never be able to breathe right without knowing that Sasuke's okay, and that his nightmares have been pushed away for at least an hour.

But it's still Sasuke he's holding right now, and Sasuke he'll always return for.

Blue eyes draw sidelong, catching the soft breeze that pushes through the open window.

_Was that open last night?_

He yawns— a silent, tired move —and turns his body to entangle closer to Sasuke. Naruto hooks his arm up through the raven's and ignoring the silent world around them, he tries to gain a bit more sleep.

Whether he gets it or not, is another question entirely.

That's held off for now though, and Naruto focuses entirely on the borderline of dreams. This—the world or something else—is barren and dusty in his mind, albeit with one resounding thump, it becomes abrasively _loud_. Naruto flinches, catching the sound coming from a faraway place outside the door, and waits for the third noise before slowly disconnecting himself with Sasuke, a frown flush on his lips. Everything in him wants to just curl up closer pretending he doesn't hear it, but he realizes now that's impossible.

Not with a voice inside him chanting that he needs to go to that door… to see what's on the other side.

The ex-hokage glances forlornly at the sleeping form he has separated from, making sure to keep the blankets around him as Naruto slips upward. He's shaky at best, teetering as he takes the smallest step. It's only when he sucks in a huge breath, thanking kyuubi for it's busy night; for patching up enough bits to provide the useful elements of walking on his own; that he manages his first solid step alone.

Well, mostly.

He has to hold onto the edge of the bed to move, stretching awkwardly toward the nearest wall when he's out of space. His chain, creaks under the strain, though he ignores it. It's not until he hears voices that he considers the foolishness of his choice, and twists back toward the bed.

A new ache rips up his back, threatening to throw him off balance. He pauses, reminding himself that every tomorrow is yet another broken promise. And that what's happening on the other side of that door….

May be someone he's suppose to save.

_Just.. One step at a time._ This is the darkest, most dangerous step he's taken so far, but he shoves the thought away. He imagines the things he might find on the other side. Most of them, horrible.

Too bad, he doesn't even make three, and he's sliding to the ground.

A tan hand swats angrily at his legs, cursing them for being 'stupid'. He gives the limbs a couple moments before he grunts his way back up, clinging to the flat surface behind him. Footsteps reach his ears this time, tapping into the distance. This is all probably for nothing, but he's wasted enough already to just get moving.. To keep edging his way on.

_One peak, and I'm going back._

_

* * *

_

_Review, plox!_

_Have a nice day! __:D_


	19. The Temptation

**The Temptation**

**Sasuke's POV**

Sasuke wasn't sure of why and how the figure laying next to him had dissapeared now or why he hadn't reacted. He was semi asleep, meaning he was half aware of what was going on around him, even not under perfect clarity. The thing that scared him more though was that Naruto wasn't asleep.

Did this mean he had heard everything he had said? He didn't remember what exactly he told to the kitsune but he knew he had said something heart felt and that was what was frightening him. He didn't want the blond to know, because Sasuke wasn't sure anymore…of Naruto's feelings. Had he forgiven him or was he pretending?

What if he was planning to kill him while he'd be under his guardiance as well? Even if the raven knew how unlikely such an act would be for the blond, he couldn't just let believe that anyone would have so much power, so much strength in their heart to forgive the traitorous deeds of his.

Naruto was so patient. But he vaguely wondered : would he forgive the same things if some other person was in Sasuke's place? If the answer was yes, he'd be able to feel relieved and bury his regrets forever. If not, that meant that Naruto had such a soft spot for the raven and that he might as well still be in pain from the betrayal. And Sasuke didn't want to deal with this in his mind.

He stayed silent and immobile, eyes tightly closed, as if he was trying hard to not return to a full awakening. It was early yet, he could tell, he was used anymore to be able to guess the time by the voices outside his room. The ones that probably, as he figured had dragged Naruto's attention.

It was mostly people training. But it was a brutal, cruel, inhuman kind of training. A training in which sometimes a part or even both were willing to fight to death to surpass their rival, prove their worth and risk getting stronger.

Sasuke himself had resulted several times heavily injured, though this was no serious deal for him anymore. Sure, he had found it a bit too demanding even for his likes-even for him who had been trained under the ruthless wills and tests of Orochimaru once- but with his infamous persistence and devotion to his goals, he managed to get the hang out of it relatively fast and now there weren't many ninjas on those training fields who could stand a chance against him for more than the first 3 minutes, let alone oppose an considerable challenge.

For that reason alone, Sasuke himself chose many times to train all by himself. At least, he'd save Madara from healing materials and beds in the small and unprofessional hospital room he had built for his minions.

His thoughts struggled to focus on what seemed to be moving painfully slow towards the window in the other side of the room. Eyes closed still, he could guess his exact location just by experience for many years on the field. He was not specialized in chakra detection but he knew the ups and downs of it.

He was in need many times of himself to detect people by their chakras on the battle or training fields, so he had fairly improved at something he didn't posess a genetic boost of.  
Sasuke inwardly cringed, as his conscious returned back to a fully awaken state, leaving him frown annoyed by the intense source of light that was diving in the room out of such a small window.

He made no move to open his eye lids, move himself or show any kind of sign that he was awake. He didn't want to disturb Naruto's plans, or startle him or make him feel as if he was there to stalk his every move and punish him for it.

It felt bad knowing that probably that was the way Naruto perceived his protection but it couldn't be changed. All he could do was give him some minimal space to breath. His breath stopped in its tracks, as he heard something similar to a thud, as if something had hit the floor and he instantly guessed it was Naruto. Sure, he ought to still be clumsy so early after his recovery. He needed more time to regain his full strength, kyubi container or not.

But still it was amazing to see how fast the demon fox healed him. Before, he had such grave internal wounds and deep superficial ones that he hadn't be able to reach while he was stitching him. He was no medical nin. But the kyubi had that ability and it could surpass all the medical nins he knew off. Even Tsunade…But that was something to be expected from a powerful 9 tailed beast, wasn't it?

Slowly, flickering his eye lids open, he remained in place, breath as calm as ever. But….something felt weird about him…his face, …his skin,…his cheeks, they felt wet.

Had Naruto being crying? He shivered involuntarily at the thought, as his heart clenched in his chest. Then he froze at the thought. Of course not. It had been him who had been crying, in Naruto's embrace.  
Coming to think of it, he remembered some beats. And it was strange how an emotionless guys of his likes came to be so sentimental and sensitive just by being close to a person he loved.

That was the initial reason he wanted to get rid of any emotional bonds either way. As a kid, his heart was ready to burst of love every time he saw his parents or brother, before the tragic day. He knew he had a bit too intense feelings for his people, even if he was too young to have good self knowledge back then.

But he knew. And it didn't bother him. Because then he hadn't lost anything yet. And he didn't know how it was to lose those bonds. How it felt for them to be cut suddenly out of your heart, leaving you numb in pain, in shock…in fear and loneliness…bitterness.

But he soon came to learn. And he sweared to what he held as most important in his empty life….if he was in the place to know what life held for him before the tempest that hit his childhood with Itachi's crimes, he wouldn't have let himself experience such strong feelings for his family. And if he couldn't do that, he'd run away, just like he did with team 7 some years later.

Or if all the rest failed, he would have killed himself…to prevent him from every experiencing such deep absolute hurt. No one deserved to feel this.

Thinking of all this, though, wasn't actually helping the situation with Naruto and he cursed himself for his random flashbacks inside.  
He could see the comparison now, the connection. Naruto's family was Konoha, his fellow ninjas of the academy, his teachers, his comrades…and Sasuke had helped in their slaughter.

Was he another Itachi for Naruto? It could be. Just like with Itachi, Sasuke was now the only member still alive in his vast ''family''.  
But Naruto had forgiven him so far. Not only forgiven, but also he hadn't even blamed him for anything. Unlike the raven avenger had done with his older brother.  
It all felt so unfair, so much that it made his chest hurt. If it was for anyone else, he wouldn't care, but this was Naruto, the man he loved.

Snapping out of his thoughts, he moved slightly and sat silently on his bottom on the bed, shifting the sheets away from him.

He looked at Naruto as a cat looked at a panicked mouse that was trying to find its way out even if it knew there was no escape.  
It was both sad and amusing in the same time. But Sasuke wasn't there to torture Naruto. These days were over, hopefully.

He rubbed his eyes slightly, feeling his fingers coming in contact with the wet skin and turned his bored gaze on Naruto.

Even in that state, Sasuke realized that Naruto would never fight to save the others. Even if he knew that everyone was dead and done, Naruto would fight in his dreams, in their shadows, in his illusions, to save the irredeemable, the ones who were already goners, the ones who denied fiercely his help, everyone that was screaming for help even if they didn't know it.

Naruto was there for them all. But who had ever been there for him?  
Sasuke left that question lingering in his hurting mind as he softly stepped down the vast bed. Giving a side ways glance at Naruto, he stayed silent. He didn't plan to scold him for moving away, but his silence spoke volumes, in its own.

He couldn't deny he was feeling sllghtly unnerved by Naruto's persistant tries to walk away in order to save the remaining villagers or escape. He didn't want to lose him. But Naruto didn't seem to want to be close to him anymore.

Maybe…wanting to save the others was an excuse for him to always run away from the raven?

His paranoid mind just couldn't make a rational assumption out of it all. Perhaps he was too possessive for his own and Naruto's good.  
He made some slow soft steps towards Naruto, who was supporting himself against the wall.  
His onyx eyed bored strictly into Naruto's, accusing almost, but then he shifted his gaze from the blond, deciding that he wasn't in the mood for a scene in the early morning.  
Turning his back to the blond, he dove his hands into the water bucket that was placed on a small low table and he watered his face, rubbing the surface kind of harshly, to push the sleep away from his eye lids.  
With a rushed glance over to the window, he saw it was indeed sunny and hot air was coming through, making the dust dance furiously, as in a hurry, under the yellow light.

After he swiped his hands with a small blue cotton towel, he tossed it on the bed and grabbed the side ends of his shirt, dragging it upwards and in the process, pulling it completely off him, revealing his bare chest.

Since today it was sunny, the less he had on the better, he thought. He would be out to train true time after all and sweat would just make it less comfortable for him to move around in his body.

He hadn't said a single word to Naruto all this time and even if he felt unnerved by his own cold stance against the blond, he kept his emotionless facade, as he tossed his shirt on the bed.

Shifting his gaze back to the kitsune, he covered the distance between them and stopped a breath space before him, looking in his eyes stably.

''They are training.'' He said in a low soft tone, as his gaze flickered knowingly to the window before returning his onyx orbs back to the blond, boring into him lazily.

He thought he'd save Naruto some time before he made his whole way to the source of the noise by telling him what exactly it was about.  
Of course, Naruto could still resume his way there after Sasuke left. He knew how stubborn he could be but instead of ordering him to quit his pointless efforts, he thought he'd be more subtle.

With that, he turned on his spot and walked towards the door, leaving Naruto where he had found him when he woke up.

As usual, food for the blond was arranged to come long before the time the raven would be back. Now if Naruto would need a little help again with eating it or not, that was a whole different matter on its own.  
Even if it saddened him to see Naruto denying things that could improve his health, he decided he rather enjoyed taking care of his kitsune. It was his own subtle way to express his caring, without being too poignant about it, without being all that open about his feelings, something he found hard.

He put his hand in the handle and opened the door, but came to a halt before stepping out, turning his head slightly sideways to look towards Naruto's direction, with the corner of his eye, his signature unreadable expression on.

''I'll come back at noon. Don't stretch yourself.''

And with that, he stepped out, shutting the door somewhat angrily, leaving the blond alone in the room.

**Naruto's POV**

Naruto used to think Sasuke knew, back before.

Before team seven, because surely that was why Sasuke really ran away and never looked back. Why he started acting like he'd never had a best friend or a make-shift family or anyone at all. For years, Naruto thought it was then.

Later, Naruto decided it was before he left. That whole period (almost a year) when Sasuke kept his distance through all those tight places and broken dreams, that must have been because he knew. Once he was gone, it seemed Sasuke's absence became more than Naruto could possibly handle. Clearly, he'd been mistaken somehow: Sasuke wouldn't have betrayed him so coldly if he knew how much—absolutely everything, down to the name written on his soul—Naruto had always been ready to give him.

To be honest, Sasuke really should have known when they were drawn together again several years ago. The fact of what Naruto wanted to trade for Sasuke couldn't have been clearer—it was laid out as solid proof in tears and blood. Sasuke couldn't possibly have missed it, he'd have to have been blind.

However.. now that Naruto's been sentenced to his own Hell, the blond knows the image of Sasuke and the world around them has grown irrevocably skewed; and he's sure that a certain knowledge must have been part of what allowed murder to be written off as a simple string of irony, and for everyone to be forgotten. Because now everyone was dead, and Sasuke's eyes were finally on him. He and Naruto were on the verge of being able to set things right between them, but it was all too bittersweet.

Mostly since Naruto didn't think they deserved it.

_Not until Konoha's restored._

Even if he can't pinpoint exactly when it was, Naruto figures Sasuke must have known sometime—hell, he had to. How else could he have felt so safe in leaving, in rejecting Naruto and every part of their past? It had to be because he knew Naruto would always be waiting for him, just hanging on the hope of his return.

So it is in the silence of morning, after they'd rested aimlessly under moonlight and the illusion of sleep, Naruto welcomed the soft clarity that echoed.

No longer were they the stupid little boys sharpening their kunai. They were just stubborn men trying to hold onto their sanities. And they were bitter because of it.

In Naruto's eyes, this new life of his will always be filled with the same pain that flows on, like in an endless river. Because just like the history books report, every soldier must find their way back to the lines. No account has been shared about the care between supposed enemies, nor toward the names of all those the leader has lost. No, no. In his book, Naruto will always keep trying to find Sasuke, or keep making excuses.

The blond will forgive everything and anything without question, so long as it saves him. Because in the end, it won't matter when the ex-Hokage thinks he knew. It'll be written off in the uncredited edition of their lives, drawled on about in blank pages of their histories, repeating itself over and over.

_Don't let go._ Naruto blinks, watching the shirtless form shift from the bed and come toward him. The blond pauses, aimlessly stunned as Sasuke stop's just a hair away. Another inch, another breath..

''They are training.'' He looks at Sasuke as if he's grown another head; so flustered by the very essence that's settled before him and it's like burning his soul alive to be close like this, and not reach out and _touch_.

''**For what?**'' The sound is null of the meaning it hides, or by the reassurance that's unknowingly sought against his half-naked other. Minutely, Naruto remembers he's been making the same mistake. That he's leaving Sasuke for Konoha, and putting the safety of others before himself. Unfortunately, he feels no remorse. Because when it comes down to it, Naruto knows he'll do everything the same. Just like he knows the Uchiha would. If he doesn't, who will? Sasuke has set him up like a crutch without an arm for years— and he's never once complained. Never once thought more of anything Sasuke has given him, or doubted that one day he'd return. They've got hundreds of scars from their encounters, and millions more from the enemies they've faced alone.

_Don't walk away._

And just like that, he was gone.

''**Teme, wai-**''

Naruto has swallowed Sasuke's abandonce twice, and the second time hadn't been any easier than the first.

In the briefest clearing in a forgotten grove of memories—someplace dark, because it matters to him if not Sasuke that silence be comfort now—he lays the last of his concerns to rest as the door slams shut.

He grips at his chest with shaking hands but can do no more, even with a lifetime of lectures behind him. He knows what's expected, but this is Sasuke and he just can't do it, can't forget Sasuke that way. Never. He almost wills himself to abandon the whole idea of caring about the door's secrets or his people, half-tempted to leave Konoha's memory to rot, because he knows how hard and lonely the coming days—weeks, months—are going to be. But he can't.

Because Sasuke's gone, and Naruto'll never be confident that he'll be true to his word.

Naruto stays put for the first few seconds, surrounded by Sasuke's scent as he drifts in and out of troubled thoughts. Sometimes he staggers and grows restless, too aware of the accusing silence. He starts toward the door then and slumps as if that will leave the curiosity behind, stopping a half-hour later when the weight of fatigue returns.

He doesn't think too much more when the voices begin to erode his conscience, clotting his heart. It isn't that he's hoping for a random miracle anymore, not by a long shot, just that he can't... he can't be anything for anybody else right now. Not polite, maybe not even present. He just wants to curl up and die, and the only thing that keeps him from doing it is knowing what other's have sacrificed already for him to still be alive.

Two hours go by, and Naruto's saves his energy for the restless souls and one-minute conversations with food-carting enemies. He'll take up his walking again soon enough but it won't help much, not for anyone else. He knows this despair all too well, having lived through it before.

In the too-long silence, he finds himself wandering quietly from the wall to the door in the shadow, searching for something that will never be there to find. He watches the frame while his soul bleeds down inside him, waking when his head thumps against the smooth coolness of the pine.

He takes his time to wrap his hand around the knob when he reaches it, tired of resisting the urge to hold something close like an extension of what this self-torment is. He hopes better then, with the comfort of that familiar thought. He twists it hard, letting the door swing on it's own accord.

The seconds tick by like a haunting reminder of all that he's lost and for an instant, he forgets that the people are gone and everything becomes harder; but he'll trade them willingly for those rare seconds when he dreams of childhood. Those dreams are all Naruto has left of his supposed family, and it takes every ounce of his strength to get going again instead of spending long hours drifting in and out and chasing the hope of finding the next dream instead.

He took a deep breath, and stepped forward to the image beyond the door. Biting his lip, holding his breath, he rocked back on his heels like a lost child, taking what comfort he could from such a simple action.

_Oh god.._

Gradually, Naruto quiets, and his breathing ceased. He swiped his wrist over his face, rubbing at the tired pupils. He just.. couldn't believe what he was seeing! There were people, everywhere. And they were so violent, so horrid to one another in so called 'training', Naruto could barely keep himself standing against the sounds and images that rushed back into his thin form. Somehow, he managed to catch himself on the verge of falling over, making quick work of clinging to the door as he gazed at each fighter for a second more; before shoving the door shut.

Once it is closed, Naruto's body physically deflated.

He turns doggedly toward the bed, where he notices the food has been left for him. Everything has been left in a rather tidy, a bit too perfect for him to like.

_This is how it's going to be…_

Jiraya's voice is so certain when he lays it out for him so many years ago. There's how other people live and how the future Hokage must live. They aren't meant to be the same— won't ever be the same— and there's no use crying about it or trying to change it. There are places to go, things to be done, all of them important but not in the way other people understand.

Naruto needed to be perfect, those elders tell him, and he has to watch out for everyone. Because families don't really need much outside of themselves— so he'd better not get too attached to other people or places. Those things don't last.

Nobody ever said it could be lonely, always living with secrets. Nobody mentions that the future includes him turning his back on all the things he loved, always wondering if this is finally it, if this is the time he might not ever come back.

He frowns at the room. It's too quiet. Even with the noise of violence— louder than ever— there's silence underneath.

The rift between Naruto and Sasuke seems to grow tenfold, though Sasuke already left what seems like weeks ago. It's here filling the room, so large now that there's hardly space any more for Naruto to breathe. Every thing he thinks seems wrong, and he realizes now that it was only Sasuke who ever really listened, even if he didn't agree.

Naruto's never been so lonely as he is right now, staring at a future with the possibility of just him and this silence and a terrible, gaping hole where Sasuke and the world should be.

Never has so much space felt so suffocating.

The blonds heart is frozen, waiting on Sasuke.

All those things his sensei's taught him aren't enough now. Who to be and what to do was different with someone there looking over his shoulder and keeping Naruto firmly within the lines.

The clock is ticking...

He's lived without Sasuke before, survived and endured as Uzumaki do. But having done it—raw fingernails clinging from one day to the next—he'll be damned if he's doing it again. He doesn't want to know what it would feel like, stuck here in this room for the rest of eternity, not when Konoha's waiting to be rebuilt.

When all those souls are urging him to be saved, sweeping him toward the window at a cautious pace. A hand is fiddling through sunny locks, accounting the teachings from so many books or experiences.

_I don't know where to turn._

Complaints of violence become his only company in this distilled room, permitting he perch quietly upon the sill. He won't look out at the people training, just stares overhead. He's forgotten what it felt like having time to count the clouds, or even what they looked like without a hinge of red.

For whatever reason, he ignores the smell of smoke that clings to only his frail senses, or the small flame that seems to trickle out of his beating heart. He's too caught up in the purity set upon the sky, and stretching out a small hand to trace it's patterns.

'_Do you still want to save them?_'

The voice is punctuated, like a rough grate being sanded against an open wound. It cuts through Naruto's facades easily, jerking him back against the sill in question.

''**Who-?**'' Naruto's body feels like it's burning inside, crackling under the skin. He isn't frightened though. Mostly cus' he catches on to what's happened. The fox's already tried taking over him before, on worse occasions than this.

So by now, he knows what that feeling means, about the disconnection of someone else controlling him while leaving just the scorched edges on his nerves to call his own. It doesn't mean he won't fight it. It means he'll win, albeit horribly shaken.

'_You wanted a miracle, boy. Don't deny me._'

The kyuubi's got the boy here, although he'll be damned if he lets his guard down no matter how hard it is to bend against the demon's rule. Anxiety hovers pinprick-sharp behind his eyes, until everything suddenly shifts and jolts and falters as the fox pushes at his body with a toxic roar of laughter.

Naruto waivers for a moment—dazed by the sudden change—and then he snaps to in a breathless rush. He picks himself up, one hand supporting him against the wall as he groans. The blonds body is used-up tired by now, shaking with the vibrations from the creature as Naruto struggles for his focus.

Then the world goes blinding-white like the stretch of eternity, fire-hot agony until it just stops.

''**Sasuke,**'' he murmurs. Naruto draws strength from the name, and shoves further against his emptiness.

'_I can save them._' it urges back, catching his attention on an underlying level. Blond hair juts awkwardly against his tan cheeks, mussed from their previous struggle. Naruto is still trying to right himself properly, and stumbles amiably toward the bed stand.

''**How.**'' the choice Naruto's willing to make is as obvious as the one's he's made for Sasuke; of the ones he's still willing to forsake in the name of forever.

'_You have to free me._'

Naruto grimaces against the rising flame that threatens to burn his skin inside out, forgoing any chance of fighting back this time as he barely manages to tumble back to the bed without gasping for air.

''**Are you... are you l-lying?**''

'_Heh. Does knowing truth matter more than Konoha?_'

For a moment, Naruto believes he's fallen further into Hell. But when a growl shakes from his cracked lips, Naruto feels the lonely fabric beneath his fingertips and _cries_ such a sad sound, it borders on the insanity he's welcomed. The voice is dominating his body now, rumbling murmurs and doubts. '_I'll save them, boy. All of them._' Swallowing thickly, Naruto considers the fox.

Vaguely, he knows he's still alive. That he hasn't been conned out of life, yet. Only because he can feel the other's presence roll off of him like an endless nightmare that showcase the future, and all the promise it could hold. Otherwise, he would wonder—haunted by another's pain, his own soul a fading shadow in the blinding sun. It could all be Hell or just the bleakness of a world without hope.

They might even be the same.

The fox grows tired of this gallows humor, but Naruto doesn't have the energy to find new ways to entertain him. All he can do is hang on through another second, knowing they'll run out long before he's ready. Then he'll be gone.

In some ways, he already is.

''**Alright.**'' he says— and it's like a blur of faces that collide together all at once, forming the broken image of his only remaining friend; only survivor. The one who's defeated all odds and still come out swinging.. despite the scars that mar his body, or the coldness that threatens to break every shred of warmth inside.

'_You're unbinding me?_'

Sasuke will understand, he thinks, not even paying attention as the nulling sleep edges at his vision, or as the door creaks open.

''**I'll.. give a-anything,**'' he's wheezing, drawing Naruto's flaws all too close to the surface. His body twists in reflex from the brand of imperfection, shifting away from the voice stuck inside his own head. The food has been flung by this point, scattered on the floor in a fit. Naruto is about to thrash a second time when he feels someone's hands plant firmly on his arms, applying pressure to the limbs.

'_Theres no turning back,_' it warns, pounding into his head a million times harder than any ninja. Naruto struggles against the hands, mumbling and growling all at once. More hands are joining the previous, colliding with any part of him they could.

''**I don't care.**_**I don't care**_**!**'' Naruto whispers back.

There's a certain primitive aura that's circling his veins, waiting for the moment it desires. Naruto is wrestling with the nearest ninja that has him pinned, snapping his teeth together in the struggle.

''**Just...!**''

The blond's eyes snap open. He's frantic now, deafened by the sudden orange hue everything has absorbed; clouded by the bloody pupil his fox has declared. Naruto feels his soul being tethered back, dragged into the distilled darkness he's wanted so long. Albeit for some reason, he won't give in. Not even when white hands are clawing at his body from within, or when all he can hear is the fox's static. His gaze is roaming fighting searching hoping for something he can't even remember.

Not anymore.

''**Sa-**'' the name broaches his lips, but freezes against growing canines. The fox whispers something in his ear, giving a sweet promise of a home he'd never see again. Naruto's chest is heaving, rising erratically despite his ever-slowing heartbeat. The one thing he wants to say won't rest easy with anyone, but he doubts he'll even be able to say it.

_I'm sorry I didn't tell you.. and that you had to figure it out alone._

He doesn't want Sasuke to think that he was the only one who knew. It wouldn't be fair. Murder and mayhem can be written off by whatever means, but Naruto doesn't want it to be because Sasuke _knew_. He wants it to be because he was waiting on that forever neither of them received.

* * *

_AAAndd, done with this chapter, as well! Updating, here I go!_

_Please, review!_

_Thanks, thanks!_


	20. Touch

**Touch**

**Sasuke's POV**

The demon fox had surfaced. They had heard weird noises from his chambers, and Madara had ordered some guardians to go check up on the him. They entered the room to see an erated mad Naruto trying to fight something invisible, his eyes tightly closed and the mark of whiskers more intense and clear than ever on his heated cheeks.

Sasuke looked apathetically at the short man in front of him. His characteristics were calm and in place but his cheeks gained fast in heat that he could almost feel them burning.  
He said they heard him murmur things that made no sense to their ears. And then the murmurs turned into animalistic screams. Ones that made no sense, too.  
_  
__Perhaps, I'd be able to see the meaning in them if I was there_. Sasuke then thought.

But he couldn't have been. And it was out of Madara. The man had told him nothing about it from beforehand. Instead, he had ordered his ninjas to put on a chakra seal on Naruto, thus sealing the fox demon inside the blond for good, and preventing any form of jutsu requiring chakra supplies of ever happening.

Madara thought he had been pretty tolerable with Sasuke's whims, his wishes to keep the blond alive and with him. If he could, Madara would have already extracted the demon out of the former hokage, but allas, somehow Sasuke had convinced him that besides the fact that they didnt know fully how to do it, it wasn't the right time. But with the current event, Madara's doubts about Sasuke's sincerity grew darker and bigger. He didn't want Sasuke to be there when the seal would take place.

Not that Madara thought that Sasuke would be as daring and foolish to protest against such a safety move, but everyone who knew a little bit about the methods Madara used in similar cases-he had controlled tailed beasts before- knew also that they were very painful. It was a pain that was almost able to kill you on spot while the chakra seal was being performed on you, but gladly it didn't last long after the procedure had been completed.

If nothing, it left your nerves kind of numb, as a result of the intense pain you'd have endured previously.  
Madara didnt'want Sasuke to witness that. If Sasuke was okay with Naruto getting another Kyubi seal, he knew the raven wouldn't be okay seeing the kitsune in dreadful pain. He'd get in their way, try to prevent them and get angry at Madara, causing a mayhem he wasn't eager to deal with at the moment. He had more important matters at hand, and getting done with the uncontrolled demon's issue was one of his priorities.

Madara wasn't stupid. He more or less knew Sasuke somehow cared for the blond. They used to be teammates. But that wasn't all. Sasuke had done everything to persuade him to allow him to have the blond under his protection and control. That was not a thing Sasuke did everyday, unless he had a personal profit to gain. In this case, Madara allowed himself to believe that the later wasn't the case.

Because Sasuke might be incredibly strong but in the same time the boy was a bit of a simple minded idiot. He never had any big aspirations or plans, like controlling the world, or handling a tailed beast for his own matters. He was simply satisfied just by going after revenge and his ambitions' horizons ended at that. What Madara didn't know though was, to what extent Sasuke was willing to go for his blond.

Only time and…tests could tell but for the meanwhile, the kyubi seal had been performed, Madara was sitting on his room, enjoying his lemon tea and Sasuke was just being told the news from one of Madara's filthy mignons.

At first, Sasuke felt so enraged. So Madara had tricked him. But why? This was alerting. He could accept the seal. But why had Madara felt the need to lie to Sasuke while he'd been doing it? Why tell him later and not then? Was it something he should be worried for?

He hurried to see Madara in his office, and even if the guardians protested that Madara hadn't desired to meet with anyone till next morning, Sasuke had already ran out of the last straws of patience in him.  
Pushing the guardians aside, he bursted into the office, glaring at Madara dangerously.

''Calm down,boy. It was something I had to do. And you being present there might cause me problems. ''Madara said expecting such a heated reaction, eyeing Sasuke with something between curiosity and amusement.

''Why did you lie to me?'' Sasuke asked trying to control his temper, a calm facade shining through his face, one that didn't fool Madara though. He had learnt Sasuke far too well for his own good anymore.

''Why wouldn't I? You're very predictable, you know, Sasuke-kun. You often like to act rebellious against my plans. I may have been spoiling you by being lenient to your foolishness so far but I wouldn't put up with this in the Kyubi's case.'' Madara said, looking at Sasuke with a hint of anger. Was he really that dense?

Sasuke lost his temper at that and crossed the small distance separating him from the man which he wanted to tear in countless pieces in the heat of the moment.

''What was the real deal?'' he asked, in a low tone hiss, breathing heavily onto Madara's face as he had gripped his shirt, dragging him closer.

''Sasuke…I know I haven't done such things before with you, but really now? I thought you did know some things about my ways…''Madara said, enjoying Sasuke's anger. He wasn't often to be able to get some reaction out of the raven, so the sight in front of his eyes was a pure bliss for him.

Sasuke's eyes suddenly flashed in realization. But that hint was fast gone, as soon as it came.

_Pain_. How could he have forgotten that? He had heard about that before, the way Madara had with the infamous demon seals. Heck, if Naruto had been hurt when Konoha was attacked, he must have felt ten times worse pain, now.

Anger redominated fast his onyx orbs, as he retook the grip on Madara's shirt, shaking him slightly, but with big tension nonetheless.

''You're worse than I thought. Don't. You. Ever. Touch. Him. Again. Is it clear this time?'' Sasuke hissed under his breath, as all of the rumours he had heard about Madara resurfaced into his hurting mind.  
Images of violent attacks, murders, demon extractings, sealings…all of it, all in a dazzle.

He felt his heart stopping at the thought of Naruto being in such pain. He shouldn't care but he couldn't bring himself to become indifferent. It was Naruto, for god's sake! He was lucky to still be alive. That b*****d Madara had really taken it far, this time. Very far…None had the right to touch his blond, let alone harm him.

Madara chuckled, amused. How funny for Sasuke to be calling him something like that. As if he had any room to talk. But he supressed the ironic bite threatening to escape his parted lips, deciding it was time he turned the discussion to a more productive point.

''Your …''interest'' for the blond…Should it worry me, _Sasuke-kun_?'' he whispered, a sly smile on his face.

''That is none of your business.'' Sasuke said coldly, a sting of worry troubling his heart and mind.

What if Madara had realized the depth of Sasuke's feelings for the blond and decided to use it against him?

''It's not as long as you keep your part of the contract. Which was keep him under control. You failed. Once. Next time this happens, consider that broken. I don't want him causing me troubles.'' Madara said suddenly getting serious.

Playing with Sasuke's sentiments was one thing and letting Sasuke get away with it thinking it wasn't really risky for both sides was another entirely different one.

''It won't .'' Sasuke said, as he released his grip on Madara's collar,taking in a silent but deep breath after he stepped some distance back.

Madara chuckled amused as Sasuke sent him a death glare before turning around and escaping the room with a frown all over his tired face. The door shut behind with a loud bang.

Boy, was he frustrated. Damn, that Naruto. On his way back to the training grounds, Sasuke could picture what caused the Kyubi to surface was.

_What for?_

His mind running back to Naruto's simple but full of subtle hints of worry question, he knew now that he should have said something back then to reassure the blond that everything was okay. Even if it wasn't. And even if it wasn't like Sasuke to lie. But he couldn't. And thus he had chosen to leave, ignoring the silent pleas of sympathy and help.

But even if he had lied to Naruto, even if he had told him that they weren't preparing for another atrocious war act on another innocent village, brimming with life and laughter and false innocence, just as Konoha did once, he knew it would have been pointless.  
Naruto's wild spirit would never be tamed. He would never rest assured in just a broken promise or some hollow words that he could never know whether they were true or false. Instead, he'd try his best to find out more, to help, to prevent, to save. Even if it was already too late for that which he so fiercely craved back: Konoha.

The Kyubi must have lured him to let it take control in exchange for help. Really, Naruto, has your desperation made you so foolish so that you chose to believe into that demon?  
Sasuke was very angry. And sad. Naruto was threatening to ruin everything with his actions, with all his guilt that he couldn't leave behind, with his stupid big heart that couldn't simply stop caring.

He found comfort in the thought that, going by what he knew, Naruto's body wouldn't be in terrible pain anymore. But Madara's words still rang as an annoying preaching into his ears.

You failed. Once. Next time this happens, consider that broken.  
As much as he secretly hated seeing Naruto in pain for all that which he couldn't save, he hated even more the thought of ever having Naruto separated from him again.

He was an egotistical b*****d and he knew it. In the same time Naruto suffered for all those lives that had been lost, Sasuke could only bring himself to care for what he wanted.  
But he pushed the regrets his conscience woke up in him away, because a second thought was more important right now.  
If Madara broke the contract, Sasuke didn't know if he'd be able to protect Naruto anymore.

And now with the chakra-demon seal done, Naruto didn't have any chakra to use in his favor/help/salvage against any attack. He was as weak as a normal non ninja Konoha citizen.  
If Naruto wanted to save the dead, Sasuke wanted to save someone still alive. He couldn't afford Naruto taking his sanity away just because he had lost his.

He didn't feel ready to face the blond right now. If he was in the same room with him, he might end up hurting him worse for all he knew. He didn't want to be violent, but his feelings had got the best of him again. Being around Naruto wasn't good for his inner peace.

And yet most of the times, he clang to the dobe's presence as if he was a hard drug in which he was unforgivably addicted to. A pleasant one…but drug nontheless.

He sat at the small make shift inn that was ran by some female kunoichis. He didn't use to go there often anymore, unless there was a major gathering going on or he was too bored for his own sake.  
There were a few sparse ninjas sitting down, scattered in the tables around the room, minding their own business.

A few though had appeared startled to see Sasuke Uchiha sitting among them. Now, that was rare.

And even more eyes seemed to widen when Sasuke made an order. Sasuke decided to pay no mind to their unnerving attention to his presence , too drawn into his own concerns.  
Drinking a bit should ease down his nerves, afterall.  
**  
****(Timeskip)**

It was late at night when Sasuke decided to finally detach his lips from the glass of wine and make his way back to his chambers, stumbling and murmuring pointless things in all of his drunken galore.  
He hadn't got drunk since like forever, if he put his mind onto it. He had taken the habit after Itachi's death, that dark period of his life in which he was struggling to not let darkness consume him, to not lose his sanity and grip with reality completely.

It hadn't done much, so he cut it off effectively after the period of 2 months. And thus he had started trying to cope with his pain, sober mode. It was far too hard for his own likings, so in the end he just pulled his heart away from his chest and pretended he had no feelings…until Naruto came back into his life. And as if some ancient forbidden ritual that had planted secretly its roots deep inside Sasuke's psyche, his drinking habit seemed to resurface.

Sasuke thought he should either tear his heart away from him or get Naruto out of his life forever.  
Because feelings were a forbidden luxury to him. An unneeded pain in his life. They were that tiring weight that slowed him down.

But allas, he couldn't do either. Because his heart and Naruto now were one and whole thing.  
It was simply impossible.

He unlocked the room and entered inside, slightly shaking in his dizziness.  
His eyes wandered around the room, in a blurry vision, before settling down onto the one thing that was of his concern.  
And that one person was looking back at him with that face….  
The face he had been seeing into his drink the entire night, into every drop of wine he got through his lips. He was all over his mind, his soul, his heart. He had made him pathetically weak.

_Weak._

In the impulse caused by his drunk, he closed the distance between him and the bed on which Naruto was sitting on and plugged a knee on the mattress to support himself.

Gripping Naruto's shirt with his tight fists, he dragged him breath close to him, uncaring for the close proximity, the fact that he was still bare chested from the morning, the fact that he was in no place to control the outcome of his reactions. But he didn't care.  
Was it from the alcohol or because he couldn't bear this burden alone anymore, he didn't know. But that was not of importance at the moment. Because when Naruto's agitated breath hit his, he lost his mind completely.

''Tell me…! Tell me what should I do…to stop caring for you. You make me so weak…you make vulnerable! And you make me feel ashamed for this! But I can't stop it. Naruto, I…''

He paused, taking in a deep breath after the flood of words coming out of his shaking lips.

Tears were on the verge of his eyes and he still had a last hint of dignity in his state to make an effort to push them back. But he failed. And a tear streamed down his pale cheek, betraying him. And just like the tears, he spilled out his heart to his best friend, finally wording that which he had suffered out of for so long.

''I want you…'' …_so much, it hurts_.

But even if his mouth couldn't bring itself to express the rest of the sentence, the tears and the love expression in his hurting onyx orbs were more than enough to cover up for the lack of words.

And with that, he leaned in and captured Naruto's lips in his own, sealing his confession with a heated kiss.

**Naruto's POV**

Naruto thinks the room must be filled with demons, because he can't move, can't speak, can't do _anything_.

It's like being in a dream, or a nightmare, knowing what he wants his body to do but unable to convince it to obey. He remembers jerking and snapping just a few minutes ago, maybe even wrestling. But now...? There's just this dizzying sensation of falling and a far-off horror as something loud breaks through the haze of static. Then, there's pain.

White - hot, agonizingly cruel _oh god kill me now_, pain.

The fox continues to roar against some sort of information he has not yet foreseen, albeit while under the duress of the seal, Naruto can only blink absently before being hurtled into yet another spiral as the life is being choked from him.

_stop stop STOP!_

His voice is hoarse from screaming, yet beneath that, there is also the furious humor of the kyuubi's will.

When it is finished, Naruto's sure he's dead. And to be fair, his heart has stopped beating for some minutes. He is comforted, pleasured in fact, by the warmth he feels at such an in-between. It wipes his body of loss and regret instantly, though it pins something dark permanently into his skin.

''Leave him.''

The sound drags him from such peace. Orange bleeds into blue, and as the figures slink away, Naruto can't help imagining that one of the demons looked startlingly familiar.

Still, seconds seem to drag into hours for Naruto, albeit for the longest time the blond simply lay at an awkward angle; pent up and hurting. He's scared to breathe let alone think, but somehow he manages to call for the one thing he wants. ''Sas-'' the voice is ragged ad chipped, making Naruto believe he'll never speak right again. Inwardly, he's pawing around for some sort of flame, to try and find the weakness within himself and stir it back to life.

When he tries too long, the pain intensifies.

Naruto lolls onto his side, hair spreading against the sheets in a wild mess. A soft sound slides from him, desperately miserable as he takes in another hushed breath.

_Where... what about Konoha?_ This thought is repeated like a mantra, branding all of his worst memories: where there are flames and fear and loud noises and blood. Where dark things linger in the night with fangs and dead things with living eyes. His gaze drifts to the side, pretending that none of it bothers him. Because somewhere, in his best memories, there is Sasuke. Who remains right beside him whenever Naruto needs him, solid against childhood nightmares and the uncertainty of nowhere being home.

''I can't..''

( time skip.. )

Somewhere behind him, the rest of the world keeps moving.

It's quiet through most of the day that follows, though Naruto himself doesn't understand what's going on. With time, he learns that the numbness will ebb away, leaving behind this uselessness that reminds Naruto he's truly lost everything. He begins distracting himself by trying to speak with the Kyuubi again or getting himself to move without much trouble before something more than how long it will take for him to die an horrible death seems to start up.

To be frank, it was all he could do.

He'd tried not to notice Sasuke slipping into the room late in the night, even hours after Naruto had laid out his life for all the wrong reasons and had no one to lean on. Sasuke is the one with a future, so he counts on such facts to keep him from cursing how things hadn't changed.

_Is he..., drunk?_

Blue eyes concentrate on the staggering image of his dark angel, contemplating the slurred motions of an all-too gone stoicism. Naruto swallows thickly, trying not to read into the meaning of such a outlandish choice. No, Naruto would never linger on something so obvious as that. I

nstead, his primary focus transcends onto the fact Sasuke was still _shirtless_, and wondering where he'd been for most of the night. Jealousy flared within him at the thought of having Sasuke fraternizing with random ninja while he'd been laying here; slowly dying and reaquaintincing himself with nine kinds of hurt.

That idea died however; the instant Sasuke came fumbling toward him.

It had happened so fast—much faster than Naruto's eyes could seem to comprehend for a moment, before the Uchiha was on one knee at the bed, glaring at him.

''H-how..?''

''Tell me…! Tell me what should I do…'' Sasuke's whispered words fell past him, lost in the scents that threatened to ache in Naruto's heart—blood, alcohol, and the smell that was uniquely _him_. Naruto was still reeling from the relief of it when Sasuke jerked the blond forward suddenly and stared at him so hard Naruto shook.

_Something's wrong._

Hell, Naruto sure thought so—even if he was tingling head to toe, and parts of him were taking far more notice than they should have, considering that Sasuke was his best friend. So why didn't he say something?

''-But I can't stop it. Naruto, I…''

Because he didn't want to, he decided. Maybe he never had. Instead, he stretched his arm outward, ready to steady the pair in case Sasuke tipped. When the raven slowly tilted his head back and looked at him blearily, Naruto couldn't resist getting caught up in the sinful curves of the other's lips. But only for a moment, he swears it! A lifetime of dirty thoughts had surged through his head, making the blond flush against their closeness. Still, he held back.

Even when the drunken intensity of Sasuke's touch seemed to be the only thing keeping him from giving in, or from moving forward. He's searching now, looking for some ground to believe anything that he has to tell him.

What Naruto finds, is a hazy reassurance in those dark eyes, for which he holds no more reason to search. It's like a doorway into a place that Naruto had long ago given up on ever finding. He finds himself falling into that feeling, slumping back beneath Sasuke with a heavy sigh.

"You're sure?" he murmurs. Even with the willingness in Sasuke's gaze, the ex-Hokage asks.

His answer, however, takes him completely by surprise.

''Mmmph,'' Naruto said softly—not a protest, cus he's sure Sasuke wasn't in any kind of mood to hear it. One way or another, they've spent the better part of their lives trying to deny the things they wanted here, and they were both finally tired. He wanted this—the closeness, the wrongness of it all.

Everything he had left in the world was right here in front of him, confessing in a splurge of wonder. It startled Naruto, to see that Sasuke wanting this, wanting anything to do with him really. But to be honest, he was also sick of fighting voices and demons and his own self-loathing to keep it from being taken away.

When Sasuke's cool lips pushed harder against his own, Naruto quickly opened to his kiss, one hand slowly sidling up through the raven's hair and tugging him closer while the other moved clumsily along Sasuke's arm afore resting cautiously against his ribs.

He felt them sliding backward but dammit the other was a good kisser, even when he was drunk. Naruto had suspected—all those years of watching Sasuke being fawned over by different girls and women, sometimes envying them and not Sasuke, wanting all that attention for himself... he'd always imagined it would be every bit as good as this.

''Teme—" Naruto began, though his own lips were stalling, waiting for the next move. He knew he shouldn't be savoring that kiss. Or the possibility of inhaling one more second of their closeness.

Least of all, the ex-ninja shouldn't be loving what Sasuke tastes like.

Especially when the Uchiha is drunk, and probably won't even remember this in the morning.

Naruto broke away from Sasuke with this thought, staring at the other with a certain consideration most would think impossible for someone like him. His hand is pulling lightly on the raven's hair again, refusing to let him get too far. The blond was panting now, breathless from everything Sasuke stole from him. ''..stop.'' So much lies in the fragile air here, that unspoken history of passion and loss, fierceness and regret, blood-tinged kunai and faded scars. It surfaces unpredictably, splintering everything for too-long seconds—minutes—before it's gone.

In the darkness, Sasuke has hinted something he doesn't know Naruto's afraid to rely on: I can't be without you.

Softest of all is, Yes—this time I'm staying.

He knows Sasuke will never say this, but satiates himself with the almost-known. The ex-Hokage is hesitant now, caressing Sasuke's skin as if it will cool this drunken slander that is no doubt escalating into confusion.

''I'm so sorry,'' he whispers. Blue eyes grow stony, though the meaning he's hidden in them doesn't stray. Naruto allows himself to push forward on his own this time, molding his lips against Sasuke's in a soundless acknowledgment for all the tears the other's shedding; for all the weakness he's caused in him.

It hurts watching Sasuke cry. It always has, but now it's worse. Finally, Naruto thinks his best choice is to make himself stop, frowning beneath the other. Naruto is shivering by the time they're done, absolutely tremoring from the situation he's forced upon him.

Granted, the other started it first, but Naruto's never going to point a finger. Because in the darkness, Naruto is different—softer and quieter, driven purely by touch. His fingers trace the truth of Sasuke's body along the plains of his chest, remembering and cherishing all the forsaken moments that they stole in childhood to the lives he and Sasuke had led.

''How much... have you dr-?'' he slows.

The question hangs there, questioning the Uchiha's coherency. Though it's meant more for regard than anything. Because he doesn't want Sasuke to act on something he'll regret later, even if he manages to remember something in the morning.

Honestly. Kissing your ex-teammate will not be something you just come back from without much remorse. No, he doesn't want to lose Sasuke again for that reason. Not when both of them know now, and finally understand how each other feel.

_You'll always have me, whether you want me or not._

_

* * *

_

Yayy, they finally kissed!

R&RRR, plox!


	21. Feel'

**''Feel...''**

**Sasuke's POV**

Even if his mind is blurry and his thoughts incoherent, Sasuke felt surprised when Naruto opened his lips to accept his kiss. And god knew, how much passion and wanting Sasuke put in it.

All those years he never gave him anything, all those years of longing, regret, anger, frustration, depression, agony. All those years of love…All those years and all those feelings he never had the way or nerve to express to his best ''friend'', they were pured so fittingly, so fiercely, so devastantigly into that kiss.

It was as if their mouths were a communication point, where their souls and minds connected. Where their hearts became one. It was as if Sasuke was feeding to him… as if he was giving Naruto his heart's contents. And boy, were they more than he could realize.

Now that he had tasted the blond, he couldn't stop. His heart was in pain from the crazy beating, so fast, so uncontrollable, so intense that to his ears it felt like drums on a parade beating right by his side. He decided at that moment, and yes he wasn't sober, that he wouldn't stop. Now that they had finally opened up to each other, now, no, he wouldn't miss the chance.

And then just like that, as if the celebration around him suddenly took an end and took all the excitement it brought with it, Naruto broke the kiss, pulling back, interrupting the intense silence with his soft voice.

_Stop._

This causes onyx orbs to avert to cerulean ones. He is still aware of the tears that are running down his face. And he is also aware of Naruto's doubts, that are portrayed so well into the blond's eyes. And the hand that is pulling against his hair so firmly.  
Sasuke knows. It is weird, how drunk he is, yet his thoughts and feelings at that certain moment are perfectly synchronized with the situation.

He both understands and doesn't understand. He could feel Naruto wanting him by the way the other reacted to the heated and unexpected kiss.

But he can't step on solid ground, not now, not ever, when it comes to people's feelings for him. Even if it is for Naruto. And so his heart is clenching painfully insisde his chest, hoping Naruto won't push him away, wont look at him dissaprovingly and tell him this was wrong. He hopes that nothing will change after that. That Naruto's behavior towards him will remain the same, as it always had stayed. He did as he felt, yes. And he took the risks with it. Yes. But his heart was weaker than he thought. And as all gambles and risks, it was a 50/50 case: lose or win.

So what had the raven got? Which one of the two?

He expects for the answer, half heartidly, knowing that behind all his grounded thoughts, all the brave attitude, all the ego he can summon from the depths of his will to pull himself back together after a possible rejection, behind all that lies a loving heart. And a loving heart is vulnerable as a fortress without its walls. It is weak. He is weak. And at that moment, he painfully admits, , to himself that his life will end, should Naruto turn him down. Silently.

He is ready to push back and run out of the room, cursing whatever God gave him the guts to do what he did tonight. Cause if he wants to be honest with himself, alcohol alone wasn't his only motivator. No, it was more than that. It has always been. Everything else, deep down, were excuses. Fickle, pathetic, mundane excuses.  
But before his mind is able to dwell deeper into his depressing thoughts of what he fears the most, he feels a pair of soft lips pressing back against his own. And his mind blurs into desire again, losing the little reason it had in the previous brief moments of silence.

He had won. With that, he allows himself to smirk slightly into the kiss, satisfied with himself, happy with Naruto. He doesn't care if this is all wrong. When was the last time he had done something right in his life either way? He is willing to burn his future, on that bed, into the arms of Naruto, even if the aftermath breaks him unrepairably. Because he loves him.

He can feel Naruto's hands tracing the surface on his chest, stroking it softly. And he leans in the touch, not being able to resist its warmth. As if he is a puppet resting lifeless and helpless eternally under his lover's control, and those fingers running on his skin, are his strings, the ones his master has good hold onto, on life and death. The depth of his love , he realizes now, scares him.

No, this isn't a healthy thing. But then again, when had he felt something healthy? Ever since he could remember himself, he always felt things that made him feel like a bad person. Jealousy for his brother, insane antagonism against everyone, hatred for the murderer of his family and later on Konoha on its whole…hatred for Naruto. And…love for Naruto.

How much... have you dr-?

Naruto slowed down, asking him something that didn't make sense to the raven. And in fact, it didn't matter to him. He knew Naruto. He could always read his mind, and he could even now, under the effects of alcohol on his system. He thought Sasuke was going to regret this first thing in the morning.

Sasuke didn't know what would happen after, though. He knew, he was sure he loved Naruto. But he wasn't sure for himself. Even he himself deep down, didn't have complete control over himself, over his thoughts, his actions or his wills. He simply was just like everyone else, human. In the cores of his heart, he was just an ordinary man. He was anyone.

Sasuke arches an eye brow at Naruto, shifting closer. He knows he is acting like a jerk, not caring for Naruto's insecurities. But probably, he hasn't realised the depth of the blond's feelings and maybe he never will, being so thick himself. More like he is afraid to trust.

Thinking Naruto doesn't think of it as important as he does, gives him the necessary motivation to ignore the blond's questions.  
Because Naruto, if anything, should know better than that. Don't they say ''Drunken words, sober thoughts.''?

''Tche…Annoying.'' He finally says, but he fails to pull of a mockery expression. He doesn't have that much control. Instead, his face is light up with feeling and need. He can't deny himself anymore what lies in front of him. Sure, he might be a b*****d for that, but what would be of change here? Wasn't he always one?

He takes Naruto's messy locks into his fingers, playing with them, as his form is slightly shaking. He doesn't want Naruto to think this is only the result of the alcohol. Because it isn't. It is Sasuke, loving him.  
He leans in closer and his cool breath hits Naruto's face. His nose almost touches Naruto's skin, as he slowly runs his face across Naruto's left side of head. The blond smells deliciously. He can't put a name on that scent. It simply is him. That's enough to spin his world around.

''Hmmm, Naruto…''

He presses his hand on Naruto's other cheek, stroking it softly, as he leans Naruto's face closer to his.

''Don't deny me. You can't.'' He murmurs. He lets his hand drop down lazily,softly stroking all the area from Naruto's cheek to his waist. And then it shifts to the blond's back ,together with his other hand. He looks deeply into Naruto's eyes. He knows he can't hold back anymore.

What's more important, he doesn't know what's right or wrong at the moment. But he does know one thing: He shouldn't hold back.

He pulls Naruto into his arms, their two chests pressing suddenly together. Before the ninja has any time to speak or make any protests, he smashes his lips against his.

Maybe he can't prove it with words, but he may be able to prove it with actions.

Will Naruto ever see how much he wants him? That his feelings are like a mountain that can't move no matter what? They are there to stay, just as the blond inside his arms. Because, yes, maybe he had a moment of despair before, right when Naruto had pulled back, but his passion is like a flame, like a fire, spreading, becoming stronger each passing second. And Naruto's sore existance next to him is the wind causing it to go wild.

He doesn't care if he is humiliated. Maybe that is because he is drunk, but his passion has blurred everything else and his mind gives him all the wrong orders. He is going after what he wants with all of his powers. Until he breaks every last of wall of resistance.

For both of them…

**Naruto's POV**

What does it mean to truly love another?  
Naruto is sure he knew the answer once. Or at least attempted to. Hell, given half a chance, he'd still try to control everything within reach that might somehow make the answer obvious. Ease someone's burden, even. Because if Naruto can do nothing for himself, he'd trade it all for a stranger.

He couldn't stop Sasuke from leaving—to be honest, he never thought the other would actually go through with it. But he made sure he kept the remains of their home in tact during the aftermath. If he hadn't, things would never have been all right for either one of them again. Naruto isn't exactly sure about why that would be either; but he knows this fact to be as true as the sky is blue.

Now, it seemed they had survived that home dying. Well, Naruto did. Some might say barely, but still, they made it. It wasn't an ideal situation, not by a long shot, but the blond realized having Sasuke before him was what counted. He'd always believed that. But that isn't to say he isn't still rattled.

And not exactly in your typical way, either. It's a shallow, hungry feeling, that threatens to devour him whole. He'll be damned to show it though, cus' he thinks Sasuke will possibly think less of him if he does. Erk, maybe. It's not like Naruto can sink much lower than his current copious standing.

Then again, Naruto isn't one to gamble with fates. Look what it had cost him already.

Naruto wonders about so many of the others they come across in— people and families who've lost themselves or someone else, whose lives are then destroyed. Maybe things won't be all right for them, ever again. He doesn't know. He hopes for better, but he doesn't dwell on it. He never made any promises to them. Just Sasuke, and himself.

''Hmmm, Naruto…''

The words slip from those cherry lips like smoke from hot flames, and Naruto's neck is tilting back further to welcome him. Those hands are dulling his senses even more so than before, though the blond is reeling from the euphoria it brings at the same time.

Insecure or not, he'd never move away.

They were so young when society turned their back on them, he barely remembers it. What he does recall, is fear and the way everything kept stopping—his friends, the happiness. Losing the one person he'd depended on was different—like losing himself, and maybe that's the same thing.

That feeling is familiar, buried. Rejected. It's half-formed, like a memory that's just colors without sound. Naruto tries to say it, say the words both he and Sasuke need to hear, but they won't come— he just can't find them. For a long time, Naruto really isn't sure things will ever be all right again.

For tonight, the doubt finds its way out of him, flowing into the space between them and the ceiling. It is such a relief to stop thinking it, finally. Those faces are too much for Naruto as Itachi had been for Sasuke.

But this wasn't some red-heart romance. Never had been.  
And Naruto knew he could never forget that.

''Teme..''

He isn't sure how to pour everything into a kiss; it's not like he was that experienced in the first place. But the blond thought it was portrayed well enough in every dirty little hero-worship thought he'd had about Sasuke suddenly noticing him for a change(which the raven would never learn), or corresponding to having him look at Naruto with the same starry-eyed admiration he was sure Sasuke expected from him. To be sure the point was shown, the smaller rolled his hips along Sasuke's, the corners of his lips arching upward as he met the Uchiha for another kiss.

''Nphh,'' he moans, and it's a sound filled with silent wonder.

The moment ticks on, but Naruto begins to feel Sasuke's smirk as it forms against his skin. For him, such a small sigil of happiness was a supernova, powerful and rarely seen. It had his heart beating harder and faster than he'd ever imagined, prying the ex-Hokage to press harder up against the Uchiha; only to regain some type of eye contact. That hand continues taunting him as it brushes against his cheek and skin— breaking him with every lost moment.

''Don't deny me. You can't,'' Sasuke says.

All the lies about being mistaken, or _You wish_ (or even the ones Naruto tells himself) can't hide the evidence: when Sasuke reigns him in close, the blond doesn't stop him. And when Sasuke kisses him? Naruto kisses back.

It's impossible, but somehow Sasuke has shifted the universe. Naruto's here. They both are— safe at last.

''Ten times," Naruto finally whispers; assuring something most wouldn't follow. But the blond expects Sasuke to, because if there's anything left of this broken world, he wants the Uchiha to know. He's practically vibrating against the other's chest now; exhilarated and breathless from the course of events. His lips are fitted perfectly against the Uchihas, though the words he murmurs seem to get in the way.

''it'd be ten times harder than you'd think.''

The part where he care for Sasuke far too much, in all the ways a best friend shouldn't, remains quieted. Naruto has already lived with that secret far too long, from all the way back when they were graduating at the academy. Those feelings had mocked him—assaulted him—at the most unexpected moments. Even eight years later, it's like nothing at all has changed.

The rhythm of Sasuke's breathing in the dark is there if Naruto listens. So many times he'd wished he could have followed the raven, just for a few moments, and know for sure that he was still alright. That he hasn't been torn to shreds, will make it through another day. Naruto runs his hand down Sasuke's side now, embracing the smoothness of the other's skin.

He feels the arms curving around his back, and wants to whisper that he is still there—will always be there—all night long. It scares him, how easily he is ready to give this. When their lips break, Naruto is pawing at Sasuke's jeans, desperate to feel more of the skin he so longed for all these years.

"Off," he finally commands, stopping his progressions only to draw Sasuke's lower lip between his, and nibble on it.

**Sasuke's POV**

Sasuke feels shivers going down his spine as he relaxes into Naruto's hot breath, eying him in hidden surprise.

_Ten times. It'd be ten times harder than you'd think._

Sasuke blushes slightly, letting his smirk show to his best friend. He wanted, wished within the depths of his heart that his words had been true, but hearing it being so passionately confirmed by the dobe's lips made him lose his focus for a small fraction of time.

He wants to let the dobe know that he loves him, that it is hard to keep himself away from him, that he could spend all night tasting his skin, his lips, his sweat, sniffing his every smell and scent, feeling the silk of his hair against his palms, breathing into him, slowly, yet excitedly like that, excitedly yet kind of sober in the same time, no not the lack of alcohol kind of sober, but the state in which you can still see the harsh reality for what it is, even if the universe has done everything to get you the one person you treasure the most on this planet inside your very arms.

Sasuke wants to say everything that little heart of his feels to its very own limits, those feelings that keep pressing the small withered walls as if trying to open a hole and flow…flow towards Naruto's heart and meddle with his own feelings, become one. But the raven can't say a thing, not of the things he thinks and feels. Because he is so stunned, so afraid to say anything wrong, anything he might regret later on.

Some moments ago he didn't care, all he thought of was how to make Naruto his. But after Naruto's confirmation, the first straws of fear stung his heart. It was fine, it was a game, a sweet madness, a lovesick risk, before the blond had finally expressed his acceptance towards what was happening.

But now, it all suddenly got serious. And Sasuke doesn't have the possibility of a rejecting Naruto in front of him, anymore. He doesn't have any other excuses and ifs to hide behind, no. He is there and he must do it. Because he started it. And he can't pull away now. But oh dear god, does he feel nervous.

He feels Naruto tagging down at his pants, in an impatient way. His breath slows down, and his saliva cant find its way down his throat. His mind can't figure out what is happening. Why doesn't he feel ready? Why after all this tension?

He stares at Naruto for some moments, those two onyx spheres of his, piercing into the cerulean pools in front of him. As if he needs reassurance. All he sees is lusting, wanting, needing. How can he say no to that? How can he go against his own wants, his own body, that has a will of its own, all caught up in the heat of the sacred moments he is sharing with his bond.

His body wants so badly to connect to Naruto's, feel the blondes skin against his, brushing, grinding, heating up against each other. He wants to make love to Naruto, with his every being. Not just in the mortal uninteresting usual way someone does that. No. He wants his every sense, every feeling, every touch to be an emotional explosion that will set his mind off the present, the past and the future. He wants to go into another dimension with Naruto, where every happy content feeling is too much to overbear, so much that you think you have reached the maximum of a mortal's possible happiness. He wants his and Naruto's souls to make love.

Without breaking eye contact with his blonde, he slowly, almost trembling, stands up and takes a deep breath. With a confident push, he pulls down his pants and bends down slowly to completely remove them of him. Then, he kicks them some distance away in the floor and thus rests in his boxers. He towers over Naruto for a while, looking down at him, smirking slightly, his eyes shining in heat. He bends down softly and starts planting soft brief kisses on Naruto's chest, very slowly. He doesn't care if he seems weird, he wants to savor every single moment of this physical contact with the blonde.

He heads up and down the blonde's chest, his lips leaving their affectionate mark everywhere. If he could say it with words, he feels like it would lose its meaning in front of the way each single kiss of his says it instead: _I love you._

He nibbles on Naruto's n****e kind of aggressively, rolling his tongue around it, sucking it, sniffing it, playing with it: _I want you._

He tilts up his head, when he's done, to look into Naruto's eyes. If he didn't feel so dizzy, maybe he'd be able to make out what he sees into them. But allas he can't. Is it that the physical contact with his bond makes his mind so uncooperative? Just how much of a big effect does Naruto have on him?

He sits down next to Naruto and scoots closer, till Naruto's shoulder pushes against his chest, as he leans over his blonde, using a hand to pull their faces closer. He looks closely into Naruto's eyes, and then kisses his nose, closing his onyx orbs in delight. He wants to explore all those little areas that no one has ever touched before on his blond. Because to him each and every one of them is precious to him. Naruto is precious to him.

He leans his head to the side of Naruto's head and starts licking slowly down his cheek, his hot tongue leaving small trails of saliva against Naruto's soft skin. He sucks on his friend's cheek, placing his hand on the back of Naruto's head, pressing his cheek harder against his mouth. Without parting lips from the hokage's skin, he moves his lips all the way down on Naruto's jaw's side and from there to the blonde's neck, over his shoulder. He takes in the scent of his skin, as he brushes his nose against it while his lips are busy ravishing the kitsune's length of neck: _You are mine._

He breaks the kisses to wrap his hands around Naruto tightly, pushing their bodies closer together. He leans his head to Naruto's ear, to whisper:

''I want to feel you.'' While his free hand brushes softly over Naruto's genital area under his pants. He revolves his hand to tag softly down onto those pants before pulling away to look into Naruto's eyes.

**Naruto's POV**

It was like a tsunami of desires swamped him at once. Half-formed wants and words bubble from him, but are swept away with Sasuke's next touch. The only time a fleck of unhappiness enters his mind is when the other moves away; to remove what he asked for, granted; albeit his attention is now sweeping across all the scars decorating that pale body, realizing just how often Sasuke has scrapped by. Heck, he even opens his mouth to ask about some of them, when Sasuke descended back down.. And steals every coherent thought.

Nuzzling, inhaling, _licking_ across Naruto's body, Sasuke truly had the smaller wrapped around his finger in a matter of seconds. The fox rolled his hips once or twice —feeling that hard heat trapped between them. The music of Sasuke's breathing makes him repeat the motion a couple more times, just to hear the sound rise against his chest.

Pale arms come around the back of Naruto then, gripping him, pressing him closer, leaving the touches to say everything Naruto could possibly need to hear. He felt so warm and real up against him, this moment had already become more than what he deserved. Naruto was probably going to Hell for letting things progress so far, but the blond knew he'd take an eternity in the pit for this little slice of Heaven. So long as he got to keep Sasuke all to himself for just.. A little bit longer.

Yes, living started here.

Naruto urged the other impossibly closer, letting his hand slip around Sasuke's neck as he breathed out ''Teme'' like the whole world was defined by the sound. Distantly; he accounted the meaning behind those lingering kisses and soft claims, and tried to bottle the moans that leaked from his mouth in return. They were drifting further and further from any normalcy they'd once held; but Naruto didn't want to turn back. No, never.

_''I want to feel you.''_

His breath hitched. His stomach fluttered. Did Sasuke realize that he was painting the clouds in the sky with those words? His hand was dipping dangerously low, and Naruto swore on his beating heart it'd be the death of him. Ever still, he practically purrs from the still-tingling sensations on his neck, eyes wide with a life he'd long but forgotten. There are no doubts in the kitsune's mind that this is where he wanted to be. No harbored regrets. Only Sasuke.

Always him.

"O-okay," A sweet smile crosses his lips, distracted somewhat by the tug on his pants. This—Sasuke's lips on his, bodies practically joined together—was the need he'd so desperately denied. But Sasuke owned Naruto's heart, his love anchored Naruto's soul.

_Is it so bad, when both of us want it?_

Naruto probably wouldn't get to keep any of this, not forever, but he'd take it.

He'd forgotten what happiness felt like.. And now that they were here, he would embrace their time. Would count each second and engrave it into his memory.

It's why, as he slowly shucks off his pants to comply to Teme's wish, the ex-Hokage keeps himself concentrated on his eyes. Because it's in those eyes that Naruto always finds sanctuary—can always recall better than his own, back as far as he can think. Those eyes have watched his back, seen him for who he was, even haunted him, since the earliest days.

Whenever Sasuke was quiet, contemplative or blank to a pain within, his eyes were beautiful. Naruto knows he had fallen into them repeatedly from across tables, battlegrounds, hotel rooms. He knows them in all their moods. But when Sasuke's gaze goes astray, Naruto sees that too.

He smiles more softly than before, raising a hand to caress the other's cheek. It isn't nearly as expressive a sentiment as everything Sasuke has done, but Naruto allows himself the fleeting idea of shifting forward to kiss Sasuke. The move isn't hard or demanding; isn't tender or full of passion. Naruto's lips are shaking.., but he won't let that hold him back. Sasuke's lips offer benediction for Naruto's driven-down desires. Sasuke's hands form a sacrament of trust.

He's willing to give everything for tonight, so long as Sasuke's happy.

Before now, he has never had a time where he could simply enjoy something without the pressure of responsibility or stress. The patterns of his past, good and bad, never allowed for the beautiful ease of simplicity. Probably because he never felt _right_ with anyone.

Part of him is getting caught on such new familiarity. The easy glances and intense words tossed between them. But the other part of him remembers chasing Sasuke through the woods and just wanting to _slug_ the b*****d for everything—and thinks that this complete, interwoven bond they have has now come _despite_ that past, despite their differences.

With how differently they think and approach things, loving Sasuke is a sign of something more real, not less. This whole line of thinking is confusing at first, and twists in on itself. But Naruto can feel the truth lying firmly underneath it.

A contented sigh slips past his lips as he hums down toward one of Sasuke's prominent scars; an unfamiliar line that draws along the inner portion of his collarbone.

Right now, he feels more like themselves than ever before. He grins because of this, permitting the pads of his fingers drift downward at a slow pace to follow the scar in a apologetic manner; as if he could erase whatever pain Sasuke might've felt from battle. He may never get a chance to ask about where all these came from, though for this brief moment, Naruto took the time to repent for one… maybe a few of them.

_If things had been different, this is how we would have been._

Naruto's fingers have drifted along far enough to dance at the edges of his boxers, nerves pressing him to brush the smooth skin just above it. Blue orbs peer at the raven, doe-eyed and curious.

.. It was time they both start living again.

So with that, he started drawing them down.

* * *

Ok, last chapter for now! I will probably take a long time to update again but hey you can't complain, I gave you like more than six chapters in one single day! :P Kidding. :)

Anyways, me and my partner have only written up to this part so I cant know when the next update will be. Please, be patient, and please, review! I am in great need of reviews!

Remember to not be too harsh. Thanks for reading!~

Have a nice day! :D


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